Bit of background, I separated from my ex husband when my now 12yo DS was only a year old due to his emotional bullying and anger. I have since remarried and have angrier DS and a DD.
My ex has been horrendous over the years, he treats me like shit and often I just take it because I can't cope with the backlash if I stick up for myself. He doesn't have DS during the holidays at all as he " likes to have his days off to do things he likes to do" he doesn't see DS during the week even though he's only 30 minutes away because he can't be bothered. He basically only has him every other weekend, collects him on a Friday and then myself or DH pick him up on Sunday.
DS started playing rugby 2 years ago and this is on Sunday mornings. Ex won't take him. So now I either have to pick him up on Saturday or early Sunday morning.
Ex refuses to pay maintenance or buy ANYTHING for DS. I once got the CSA involved and his then boss (he's since been sacked from that job for his anger and bad attitude) let him reduce his hours so that his payslips would reflect that and he would only have to pay me the minimum. He stopped paying even this paltry amount after a few months and I just couldn't cope with the conflict for the sake of £10 p/w so he hasn't paid since.
I know lots of friends whose ex picks up and drops off their children and actually I now want to just say to him that if he wants to see DS he picks him up AND drops him off from now on. AIBU??
Ps DS often doesn't go now as he doesn't want to and now that he's older I feel he has to make that decision for himself. So he wouldn't be bothered by my saying that to his dad as he prefers being at home anyway.