Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. Protection built in.

Meet the Other Phone.
Protection built in.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To think it’s easier to want open boarders if you’re privileged?

705 replies

Theselfishsister · 12/01/2019 10:04

Having an ongoing conflict with my sister regarding refugees, she’s very ‘let everyone in’ I would say I’m somewhere in the middle.

She’s given up spare bedrooms to refugees, spends weekends in Calais helping them and is posting everywhere on SM about letting them all in. As well as attending protests regularly for the last 4 years or so.

What strikes me is that her and her other friends going to all of the events are white, MC (although she is by marriage, we grew up very WC) and live incredibly comfortably. She’s a SAHM and her husband owns his own company, they have never needed benefits or social housing and her children are privately educated with all of them receiving private medical care.

A massive increase in people here are unlikely to ever have much affect on her life, she won’t have to fight for jobs or wait for a house or deal with benefit cuts when too much is paid out, as well as the increase in waits for Medical care and school admissions. Whereas for someone like me, this is obviously a more worrying factor and the thought of just opening our borders to everyone does scare me. As much as I would love to be able to take every person fleeing a great life, it just causes me worry and I don’t think I could support completely open boarders.

She obviously just thinks I’m a selfish heartless bitch for not protesting to remove our borders or similar. When I asked why she let refugees sleep in her spare rooms but never the homeless man on the road behind her (who’s been in the same spot since she moved there 5 years ago!) she called me a racist!

So AIBU to think it’s easier to want open boarders if you’re privileged or am I just a selfish cow?

OP posts:
Oliversmumsarmy · 14/01/2019 22:20

Some people aren’t aren’t willing to do certain jobs

But they are it is just that the opportunity to work has been taken away.

How can a family man with a wife and children and rent, rates and food to house them all compete salary wise with a guy who has left his family back home in a much much cheaper area and is living 15 to a room.

Missymoo100 · 14/01/2019 22:25

Boney-

Exactly it’s all supply and demand- less workers means that companies would have to pay fairer wages.
But the influx of migration benefits business by ensuring supply of workers remains high and therefore keeping wages low, whilst the corporations keep the profits.

Oliversmumsarmy · 14/01/2019 22:27

I travelled through Spain this Summer.

I saw vans suddenly stop in the middle of the street and a guy would jump out the front and open up the back. 15-20 men with suitcases and back packs would jump out and run in different directions.

On the news was what looked like a Banana boat with some men on dressed in coats and with suitcases being towed close to shore.

The line was cut and as the inflatable drifted close to the shore line the men jumped into the sea and proceeded to run up the beach and scatter into the town.

How do we know that these are the people who are ending up in Calais.

There are no borders between any country any more

BoneyBackJefferson · 14/01/2019 22:31

Some people aren’t aren’t willing to do certain jobs. If someone else will, then why complain?

Because in some cases it is a lie, as I and Oliversmumsarmy posted this was a way of life for many rural areas.

I remember my school bringing a 52 seater bus to the local daff and strawberry fields to round us kids up because we had decided to ditch school to earn money.

I remember families losing jobs because of illegal work gangs.
Yet all of this is over looked because it doesn't fit the narrative of immigration is good for everyone.

BoneyBackJefferson · 14/01/2019 22:33

Missymoo100

I agree, I know several local business owners that have voted remain because the low paid workers benefit them and them alone.

Oliversmumsarmy · 14/01/2019 22:33

I have picked fruit and veg. It was part of our summer and I might be old but definitely not over 100years old

Missymoo100 · 14/01/2019 22:35

“There are no borders between any country any more”

Yes, and I think immigration will increase. I think the nation state will be abolished.

This is on the visitor centre to eu Parliament ;

National sovereignty is the root cause of the most crying evils of our times….The only final remedy for this evil is the federal union of the peoples.”

zzzzz · 14/01/2019 22:35

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Toseland · 14/01/2019 22:37

Why do we deserve to live in Britain more than anyone else?

Surely it’s because our ancestors worked, struggled, paid taxes, built and fought wars for this country?

zzzzz · 14/01/2019 22:38

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

BoneyBackJefferson · 14/01/2019 22:41

zzzzz

You do understand that agricultural workers under the age of 16 have had a set minimum wage?

You do understand that we were part of families that did this and this was part of the introduction to a type of work? a type of work that is no longer available to a whole section of people?

Oliversmumsarmy · 14/01/2019 22:41

You do understand the kids being picked up were illegal workers undercutting other workers pay

It was done on weight picked not on age.

As a family you weighed in everything together

Original poster
Theselfishsister · 14/01/2019 22:43

A homeless man isn’t the same situation as a refugee. Many of the refugees are people who have been forced to flee their rather nice lives because of issues in their country which are making it unsafe. They are normal healthy people. A lot (not all) homeless people suffer from addiction issues, mental health issues etc. Asking your sister why she will house a refugee but not the homeless man isn’t fair and YABU.

OP posts:
BoneyBackJefferson · 14/01/2019 22:45

zzzzz

An "immigrant" dr almost killed me by putting the wrong drugs into my drip.

Another "immigrant" dr saved my life by spotting it.

Another "immigrant" dr couldn't even understand what was wrong with my then partner because he didn't understand enough English, thankfully the "immigrant" nurse did.

Lets not pretend that all immigrants are good or bad, nor should we pretend that although the UK has a net gain from immigrants that this has a positive effect for everybody.

zzzzz · 14/01/2019 22:45

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Original poster
Theselfishsister · 14/01/2019 22:45

Sorry posted too soon (that’s a quoted post) A lot of the homeless men I saw were ex soldiers. Men who had PTSD from serving in war zones and turned to alcohol and lost their families because of it. Would you not say our country has fucked them over?

OP posts:
Sweetpea55 · 14/01/2019 22:46

Interesting that Lady Bountiful wants to have open borders and let in refugees when the impact they would have on her own life would be minimal.
UK should be sending less money in foreign add and help the homeless in the UK.

And its appalling that she would offer a room to a total stranger when she has children In the house

BoneyBackJefferson · 14/01/2019 22:46

From Oliversmumsarmy

It was done on weight picked not on age.

As a family you weighed in everything together

zzzzz · 14/01/2019 22:47

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Missymoo100 · 14/01/2019 22:49

Zzz,

Sure there are immigrants that are doctors and some who make wonderful contributions

But to assert that everything about immigration is wonderful, that all immigrants are doctors and engineers- is flawed and not based on reality.

Simply what is wrong with a fair immigration policy, as opposed to open borders that some are pushing for?

OftenHangry · 14/01/2019 22:50

*Some people aren’t aren’t willing to do certain jobs

But they are it is just that the opportunity to work has been taken away.*

I was once shouted at by a guy that I was stealing jobs from locals like himself. When I pointed out we were hiring and he can apply, he replied with a scoff and "I wouldn't do this job" Hmm
So SOME don't.

BoneyBackJefferson · 14/01/2019 22:51

zzzzz

It was a general "lets not pretend"

I am happy that you have had positive experiences.

I have had both positive and negative experiences. Friends had had wholly negative experiences. that is the point that I am trying to make.

zzzzz · 14/01/2019 22:51

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

OftenHangry · 14/01/2019 22:52

However, I agree that completely open borders are not a good idea. But I certainly wouldn't allow only high earners.

zsazsajuju · 14/01/2019 22:56

It’s not at all true I’m afraid. Legal work and accountancy are very diverse professions with a wide variety of Eu and non Eu migrants. The idea that immigrants do only or predominantly low skilled jobs peddled on this thread is totally untrue. Competition is a good thing- we want the best people for the best jobs. If it means some won’t be able to overcharge anymore, so be it.