To give up MAT pay?

[Sleepyquest]

My husband and I are wanting to start a family but I have just started a new job and would have to wait until May to get more than SMP.
I don't want to wait any longer!! But DH thinks we should wait as the extra pay would be about £3k. My argument is that it could take us that long to conceive and I don't want to let work etc dictate our lives. Yes the extra money would really help, but it's not the be all and end all.

Soooo would you wait? Or would you just go for it and what will be will be? AIBU not to wait?

Personally I wouldn't wait. But only you know if you could financially cope without your maternity pay.

I’d definitely wait! It’s not that long. And yes, it could take a long time to conceive. I thought that and got my positive test within six weeks of taking my last pill. It can go both ways.

I’d wait as it’s only 4m. If it was 1 year or something then I’d not wait.

If you didn't qualify for statutory pay you'd still be entitled to Maternity Allowance so you would still have 39 weeks pay. Assuming you're entitled to the maximum amount, it is the same weekly rate as SMP, the only difference being that with SMP you get the first 6 weeks at 90% of your average wage.

If your financial situation would benefit greatly from the 6 weeks extra then I'd hold off but as you say, you're not guaranteed the conceive in the first couple of months anyway! Good luck ttc

As it's such a short amount of time, and assuming you'd be planning to return to work after the baby is born, I'd wait. Your husband is right.

I’m confused... do you mean if you got pregnant in May then 9 months later by the time you go on MAT leave you’ll be entitled to more MAT money? If that’s the case I’d wait, £3K is a lot of money when you’re off work.

It's only a few months, you could fall pregnant straight away. A few months won't make any difference, except that by waiting you'll have money coming in whilst you're looking after your baby. Seems logical to wait

How old are you and do you have any sort of idea of how many kids you want?

How old are you?

Sorry - I would definitely get SMP but my employer offers half pay for 12 weeks if you have done a year's service 11 weeks before due date (complicated I know)
I'm 28, I would return to the job and I think we will have 2 children in total! But my husband is in his 40s so that is what makes me anxious that it could take us a bit longer to conceive.

Its 4 months, i would definitely wait.

I actually waited 11 months as then i qualified for 6 months full pay

I had a similar a year and a half ago. Although, we decided to start trying again while I was looking for a new job.

I was offered a brilliant new job and didn’t take it, thinking I’d be pregnant soon and needed my good maternity package from my current job.

Yip, you guessed it. 18 months down the line I’m absolutely miserable in my job and still not pregnant. I’ve started job hunting again, had 5 interviews this week and 4 next week. We’re still trying to get pregnant, I’ll just need to deal with mat allowance if we finally get lucky.

I hope it happens quickly for you. Why not use these months until May to start saving? You’ll be a lot more relaxed and enjoy your mat leave more if you don’t need to worry about money. Might be the difference between taking the full year or only as long as you can afford.

Good luck! Trying for a baby is so exciting :)

4 months and age only 28 id definitely wait! You don't want to be under financial pressure on mat leave if you can avoid it

@Gudgyx I'm sorry to hear that. I recently had to quit my job where I had qualified for great MAT pay but I knew I wouldn't get pregnant there anyway as I was so stressed and miserable!

I would definitely wait. The extra money might mean you can afford to take more time off after which you will definitely appreciate.

I conceived three times on my first cycle so whilst it's unlikely to happen that quickly for most, you just don't know what your fertility is like until you begin trying. So for the sake of a few months definitely wait.

I’d wait

4 months is nothing and £3k is a lot of money. I'm sure you're aware that children are expensive. Wait. You'd be mad not to.

I'd also wait. I'd spend the next 4 months tracking cycles etc to get grip on where I was. You wouldn't be more than 25 weeks pregnant in May anyway which may fit with your job requirement for needing to be there for a period of time? Or are you saying May is the earliest you could be pregnant based on that?

I took 2.5 years to conceive and had a mmc in the middle, now have 1 year old.
In your situation and even with hindsight I'd wait the 4 months. Whichever you choose I hope your ttc is short and straightforward :)

I agree about tracking cycles now (I use Clue but there are lots of apps). I also have a vague memory of reading that sperm quality is affected by diet from the previous few months, so if your DH is keen to maximise the chances, he could start cutting down on alcohol and eating more healthily from now onwards.

Thank you all! Think we are going to look at the numbers, start tracking and start to be more healthy because it's good to do anyway before we make a decision!

Good plan. What contraception are you using btw? If you're on hormonal contraception it can take a while for cycles to settle after stopping.

Just condoms! So that's not an issue

Definitely wait.