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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To be upset at peoples reaction to the muzzle?

484 replies

Doggydoggydoggy · 09/01/2019 11:56

Just that really.

Dog wears one because she has nipped a few people.

She is not people aggressive.

I had a woman today clearly frightened because she ran near her buggy.
Near as in running past it.
Not barking/lunging/acting aggressive/approaching the child etc.

The woman got really scared at the sight of my dog, recoiled pulling the buggy so my dog did what most dogs will do in response and looked at her and went to approach.

So I called her back to me immediately and put her lead on.
That didn’t stop the woman constantly looking back angrily at me as she was walking ahead.

I really don’t think my dog had done anything that would reasonably make anyone feel frightened.

I can only assume it is the muzzle making the mum think she must be some child mauling demon.

And I find it really upsetting.

I wanted to talk to her and explain that she has the muzzle for nipping dogs and that I was sorry she frightened her but she honestly poses no risk to her child and has no interest in her child.
But her constant looking back and glaring at me made me feel really uncomfortable so I didn’t.

OP posts:
Doggydoggydoggy · 09/01/2019 14:04

Where have you got running around the baby from?

She was going past the buggy and stopped and went to approach (but didn’t because I called her back) when the woman started reacting.

So she was never anywhere near the baby.
Certainly not running around him/her.

OP posts:
Pissedoffdotcom · 09/01/2019 14:06

OP you're fighting a losing battle. People have taken your post, twisted the words & now have images of your devil dog terrorising the neighbourhood babies.

Don't let it bother you. You clearly understand your responsibility as a dog owner & can control your dog. Don't let folk ruin your day

Stopwoofing · 09/01/2019 14:06

no car is 100% safe - there are many things that are generally but not always safe in life to be navigated and you have to teach your children resilience to cars, other people, animals. Expecting the world to be perfect is setting them up for failure. It's also sad when children are irrationally scared of animals as dogs are such loving companions.

pomobrokemypogo we'll have to agree to disagree, I find it part of ordinary resilience to be able to cope with a friendly dog coming up to you and to believe it is likely to be friendly as that is in fact, the reality.

AtrociousCircumstance · 09/01/2019 14:07

You’re being unreasonable to be annoyed/upset with this woman’s reaction. Her reaction was perfectly normal. A muzzled dog off the leash which rushed past and then approached her - she had every right to be alarmed.

You should understand that people will react that way.

FrLukeDuke · 09/01/2019 14:08

Some people have a dog phobia

Lweji · 09/01/2019 14:09

She was going past the buggy and stopped and went to approach (but didn’t because I called her back) when the woman started reacting.
So she was never anywhere near the baby.

It didn't have to. You'll need to think like a protecting mother, not a dog owner. Mothers will react before anything happens.
Do you think she'd risk waiting until your dog jumped on the baby?

Fine, she may have overreacted a bit, but YABVU for getting upset over it. In fact, you are overreacting even more.

Yearinyearout · 09/01/2019 14:09

I’m staggered that people expect well behaved dogs to be kept on leads in places that are popular for walking. Dogs need exercise and I’m not about to start walking my dog in empty fields just in case she scares someone with her big brown eyes. Clearly places like forests and commons are very popular with dog walkers so if people are that terrified of dogs why go there? My dog is no danger to anyone, she doesn’t bark or jump up, but will approach people with a wagging tail wanting a fuss occasionally, am I meant to keep her on a lead because of that?

ifoundthebread · 09/01/2019 14:11

We used to use a halt collar with our dog, people used to mistake it as a sign of a dangerous dog when in reality it's a sign he walks like an arse hole and I'm sick of looking like a twat

It doesn't have a major effect on anything so I wouldn't worry what people think. Unless they reacted in a physical way towards the dog or yourself just keep walking.

AgathaMisty · 09/01/2019 14:16

I have PTSD, hate alarms and sirens - gives me flashbacks. Had to stand in a changing room the other day while some ones kid had a noisy book and kept pressing a really loud siren noise. Did I stick my head out and slap the book out the kids hands? Did I launch into a nasty slanging match with the mum? Do I demand that all such noises should be obliterated from society? No - because it is my issue to deal with.

You wouldn't have been BU to move away from the siren so that it didn't bother you. Isn't that what the woman in OP's example did? She didn't shout at OP or hit the dog... or am I missing something?

I don't get why people are being called dog haters on this thread! I love dogs but am a bit wary around the ones that are bigger than me or that look a bit aggressive. Fairly normal, I'd say.

AtrociousCircumstance · 09/01/2019 14:18

Reacting to a muzzled unleashed dog approaching, when you have your child, is the most intelligent thing to do.

Ruddyfreezin · 09/01/2019 14:19

Multiple dog owner here and mum of 3. Nowadays you almost have to expect negative reactions to your dog whether it's behaving itself or not. You'll then not be disappointed/upset when it happens and get a pleasant surprise when someone is happy to have your dog approach them.

I've had dogs for 38 years and it's becoming less and less of a dog friendly world, we as dog owners have to accept that. I personally wouldn't risk letting your dog off lead with a muzzle on in case some prat with an aggressive, loose, unmuzzled dog takes a dislike to your dog and you're not near enough to 'rescue' your dog.

I'm lucky enough to be able to walk in non-public areas but it would scare me to death nowadays walking my dogs publicly now.. Two friends have lost their dogs after being attacked by other dogs.

Aeroflotgirl · 09/01/2019 14:19

Why was your dog off a lead in a public place, with its issues, it should have been on a lead always, except for a deserted field or somewhere where there is no public.

Walkingdeadfangirl · 09/01/2019 14:20

Dear god, another dangerous dog whose owner thinks it wouldn't harm a fly. It has attacked other dogs, when on a lead it lunges at other dogs, so much so it needs to wear a muzzle and owner still refuses to keep it on a lead around people.

I am not sure how a person can tell the difference between a dog running past them and running at them. I know if I saw a dog running towards me I would immediately get ready to defend myself and my family. Why can't people just keep their animals on leads, its so fecking scary and upsetting for those of us who aren't dog owners.

Stopwoofing · 09/01/2019 14:23

that's exactly my issue yearinyearout, you read these threads and they are so intolerant of dogs whereas in fact dogs cause very few injuries to people (I'd love to see some stats on the safety of dogs - i cant believe they've gotten less safe). It's normal to be a bit scared of situations where some risk could happen when you have small children, but you have to do the test of rationality, the vast majority of dogs are safe, and a friendly dog jumping on you might scare you, but it's normal to be able to process being a bit scared and get on with it and realise there was no threat there.

Louiselouie0890 · 09/01/2019 14:24

Your upset when a wan with a child got scared when a dog running towards her with no lead and a muzzle got scared for her and her child? Really? I too would be annoyed as I would think any dog that needs a muzzle should be on a lead

Ivegotthree · 09/01/2019 14:26

I love dogs and grew up with loads of them, all different breeds. But a dog with a muzzle running up to me would frighten me. I saw a Doberman in a muzzled running free in the park yesterday and gave the owner a dirty look as it should have been on a lead.

And your dog is obviously a breed with a scary reputation or you'd have said what it was by now.

Not ok to allow your dog to frighten people, whether it meant to or not.

TitOfTheIceberg · 09/01/2019 14:30

I am not sure how a person can tell the difference between a dog running past them and running at them.

If you can't judge the direction a moving object is heading in - especially when it has eyes to help you assess where/what it's focused on - then I really hope you don't drive.

Yambabe · 09/01/2019 14:32

Erm am I missing something here?

No way is anyone going to get bitten by a dog with a muzzle on because isn't that what the muzzle is for? Hmm

Aeroflotgirl · 09/01/2019 14:34

Yes Yambabe, but the dog can pounce or jump on the person. A dog with a muzzle indicates to me that they have issues with biting, and maybe other behaviours, and should always be on a lead in public.

Stopwoofing · 09/01/2019 14:36

has anyone ever seen a muzzled dog doing serious injury with its paws? I don't recall seeing one article or event like this. I understand the fear is real, but the threat seems tiny to me. I've got a huge dog, if he 'attacked you with his paws' the worst that would happen is you'd have a sore foot, it's hardly a life or death level of threat.

Doggydoggydoggy · 09/01/2019 14:39

Hmm, walkingdeadfangirl my dog has never shown any aggression towards people.

She has not ‘attacked’ any dogs either.
She has nipped some.
No blood.
No broken skin.
No violent chasing after said dog. No rolling them over and barking in their face.
Obviously, other dogs don’t deserve to be growled at or nipped, so she is muzzled...

She is not people aggressive.

And ivegothree I have already said, she is a collie.

OP posts:
Ihaventgottimeforthis · 09/01/2019 14:40

I've been attacked by a muzzled pit bull. I didn't get bitten, as the muzzle was fitted securely. I did get scratched the hell up though, and scared shitless.
I'm more wary of muzzled dogs, especially if they approach.
I don't see what the woman was doing wrong, OP if you are happy that you are in control of your dog, then don't worry about other peoples reactions. Because people will react to muzzled off-lead dogs.

Lweji · 09/01/2019 14:43

"my dog has never shown any aggression towards people.

"She has not ‘attacked’ any dogs either.
She has nipped some.
No blood.
No broken skin.
No violent chasing after said dog. No rolling them over and barking in their face.
Obviously, other dogs don’t deserve to be growled at or nipped, so she is muzzled..."

"She is not people aggressive."

The issue is that the person you encountered doesn't know this. And that person has a little one to protect. She had an instinctive protective response. She might not be familiar with dog behaviour.

So, YABU to be upset by her reaction, yes.

The onus is not on her to react appropriately to your dog. It's on you to make sure your dog behaves.

Deadbudgie · 09/01/2019 14:44

Agatha - but I was in a changing room - undressed - so probably would have been unreasonable to move away! no doubt the appalled shoppers would have thought so anyway.

The woman made the dog walker feel anxious, people who are unfriendly towards dog walkers can actually be fairly intimidating! They are so confident they are right and you and your dog are the worst thing on earth.

The point I'm making is that we have to be accepting of everyone that we share the space with. The dog walker was doing something widely accepted (well off MN) of walking her dog. Her dog showed no threatening behaviour, it turned an checked out something moving suddenly in a different direction next to it (which seems perfectly reasonable), dogs tend to move where they are looking. No doubt if the woman with the buggy had simply continued on the dog wouldn't have given her a second glance. Animals are preprogrammed to check out unusual behaviour - its a survival mechanism.

themoomoo · 09/01/2019 14:45

Clearly places like forests and commons are very popular with dog walkers so if people are that terrified of dogs why go there
erm because people enjoy those spaces?
You really think that people should not go to forests etc. rather than dog owners should keep dogs on a lead?
That's nice
Go to a park that has a dog field and stop being so selfish