To ask how your deal with know-it-alls??

[TrainsandDiggers]

You know the ones - the people who literally speak like an expert on every subject (even if the subject in question is your actual job/something you did a PhD in or something you have already done and they are about to, etc etc). The type the speak over you when you try to engage them in a conversation about the subject and/or just disregard your input even if you do get a word in?

I have someone like this in my extended family, so avoiding them is not an option. I find this behaviour absolutely infuriating though and find myself sat there seething.

Any proactive tips for managing this MN??

Apologies for all the typos - my seething fingers don’t type correctly! 😂

You can't change them. You can only change your reaction to them. Rise above it OP. Just ignore them when they start or give a cursory 'right, yes thanks for that.' If you challenge them you'll be the one who comes out looking like a dick.

I just find saying something like "that's lovely dear" is enough. It's nicely dismissive.

That’s just it. You’ve hit the nail on the head - I do look like a dick when I try to offer a counter-opinion. In fact, even if I try to agree with them I look bad as I have to almost shout over them and because I’m desperate to get my voice heard, I tend to hugely simplify my arguments. Rah! I can’t bear it. I either feel angry or patronised most of the time. But you are right - I can’t change them. Thanks for your post.

The knowledge that they are always found out and make a prat out of themselves is enough for me

It does make me wonder where they get their opinions from in the first place... I mean they must have shut up long enough to digest information from somewhere... why do they respect these sources? Baffling.

I just go silent, glazed eyes & ignore the temptation engage or challenge, it just encourages them!

As I've got older I don't even bother to argue or explain what they are saying is incorrect. I just nod and say "Oh really?" or "Oh yeah you're probably right" but inside I'm just shaking my head at them. What's the point of even engaging! I know what I'm talking about, they blatantly don't, so why engage!

Oh lord you know i'm thinking of the worst case of this i've experienced and it's making me angry just remembering him! Thankfully i don't have to deal with him anymore. It was the electrician and general handyman our old landlord used to send round. He fits your OP to a tee.

I agree you can't manage them. Or shut them up in this bloke's case. He was a know it all and could talk for England

for you if it's a family member. Learn lots of 'escape and move on and talk to someone else' tricks. Get your other half to learn a signal and call you away. Like the queen with her handbags

Ah yes, the know-it-alls. If you've been to Tenerife, they've been to Elevenerife. Drives me mad.

Definitely don't engage. Never feed the monster! I have a relative who just makes up bullshit stories. As soon as she starts I just go silent. Eventually she trails off and finds someone else to bore.

Yes, totally agree. Just smile , and let it wash over you

And mentally give them the middle finger !

If it's someone who isn't in a position to discover you're talking bullshit it's quite entertaining to gradually ramp up the improbability level to see how far they'll go with the one-up-manship

You can end up with one of your ancestors being actual Jesus Christ himself and they'll still try to out do it

Why are you shouting to get your voice heard? Just don't engage.

Smile, mutter "mmm", don't engage. I know you say you can't avoid them as in familly but I'd be doing my best.

I ask them questions which don't have a right answer or aren't related so they flounder, grab onto what you say and therefore reveal they know FA

Do exactly this:
Put your left hand on your right elbow
Hold your chin with your right hand
Close your eyes ever so slightly
Nod sagely
Listen carefully
Imagine how much fun it would be to disect him with a spoon.

My brother has always interrupted me to impart knowledge about any subject under discussion. Factous remarks given as if pearls of wisdom. Know-it-all’s are just self aggrandising bores and I like to imagine my hand on the imaginary lever of Graham Norton’s big red chair. Yesterday he told me how mashed potato should be made (as I mashed potato) then advised me of the chemical composition of nail polish and best way to apply ( as I painted nails) Never having done whatever he is explaining is no problem to this expert.

yeah yeah and a big obvious eye roll

Imagine how much fun it would be to disect him with a spoon.

Have you been taking advice from Fi in Burn Notice ?

Fiona teaching her relaxation technique to the mother of a kidnapped child.
Fiona: [in a perfectly calm, soothing voice] Now I want you to close your eyes, and take a deep breath. Picture a peaceful mountain stream. Can you do that? Now picture yourself drowning the kidnapper in the stream. You're taking a rock from the stream, and raising above your head-
Michael: Fi.
Fiona: -and with tremendous force, you're bringing-
Michael: Fi.
[Fiona stops talking]

Say, "Naw, really?" then turn away, even if it's just to look out the window. If bragging about their achievements: "Did ye, aye?" then turn away. Repeat as often as required.

I worked with someone like this. She constantly interrupted and talk over me with her opinion. It annoyed me so much that I just got up an walked away.

My SIL's ex was like this. After spending two weeks on holiday with him, DH and I were so gobsmacked and traumatised we had to write down everything he spoke about like it was some sort of therapy. He was the biggest fuckwit I have ever encountered. He made claims that were just so preposterous it was impossible not to say something. Holiday ended with a massive fall out, unsurprisingly. But with experience, like someone said upthread, don't feed the beast. Ignore, raise eyebrow in a Roger Moore type manner, smirk and turn away.