to think I have PND and to ask desperately for help?

[LondonLatoya]

Posting in AIBU as I had 0 responses on the PND board...

I think I have PND but I'm not entirely sure.

I have a 2 month old. Spend a lot of nights crying but hide this from DH (I know I shouldn't). I suffer from anxiety already and also OCD. My anxiety is massively heightened. I spend 60% of my time not enjoying my son's milestones as I'm sad that he's going to grow up and I'll no longer have a newborn. I cried when I realised that one day I would no longer breastfeed. I then feel exceptionally guilty when I wonder if it would've been easier if I just didn't have a child. It's like I love him in this tiny form too much.

I feel extremely low.

What do I do? Can anyone help me? I'm scared to go to the doctors as it's just another mental health condition to add to the list.

I feel like I'm falling apart at the seams.

Hi OP. so sorry you are feeling this way.

This organisation may be of some help:

www.pandasfoundation.org.uk/about-us/

However I would urge you to both talk to your GP and also your DH about how you’re feeling. PND is nothing to be ashamed of and it’s important for you and your baby to get the help you need ASAP.

You sound like a lovely mum, I bet you’re doing a great job, but there’s no harm in getting some help. Take care.

Hugs to you from someone that understands. First step tell your DH, he probably won’t understand but it helps have someone on your side, next make an appointment with your GP, there is a lot of help out there but you have to ask for it, and that is hard. Do you have any family you can speak with?