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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Without me, you are nothing

11 replies

Littlemust · 06/01/2019 00:16

(Name changed)
.......said by DH at the end of an argument.
I commented that we had some fresh bits in the fridge we needed to use up.
Dh said I should have cooked them then -
I replied that he could have cooked them, not just me.
He replied that he doesn't cook those dishes (simple pasta bakes etc).
I said he needed to learn to cook, he said if he can't cook (it's not what I said but he often twists what I say) he won't be cooking for DC's. (As in nuggets, salad, chips etc) To which I said fine, but I would need to take dc to a club on a Tuesday as they need to eat first and he'd need to do my task instead which is much more work, he said I would have to cook something for DC so he could give them that instead on that day. I said no, that would be lazy.
Dh replied that if he is lazy (Twisted, again) he will stop helping at all and watch me 'suffer'. I said fine - but you will need to leave, to which he refused.
And said 'without me you are nothing'.

He later tried to say he meant we are a team which is obviously a bunch of crap. How can I communicate with him?
What I say isn't what he hears. And to belittle me so easily, is it salvageable?

OP posts:
Doved · 06/01/2019 00:25

LTB

SignOnTheWindow · 06/01/2019 00:25

He sounds like a childish, manipulative arse. Poor you Flowers

stillreadviz · 06/01/2019 00:51

I'm sorry op he sounds like a total arse. It doesn't sound like a respectful way to speak to someone he's supposed to care about at all

AtrociousCircumstance · 06/01/2019 00:53

What a manipulative nasty gaslighting wanker you’re married to. Why would you want to salvage it?

Ginkythefangedhellpigofdoom · 06/01/2019 01:18

You are being abused.

I'm sorry I know that's very shocking to hear little but you are. You deserve much much better than this.

Get over to relationships and have a good thing then start a thread.

I'm going to go over there and get a link to the sticky il post it here please please read it.

BananasAreTheSourceOfEvil · 06/01/2019 01:22

That’s disgusting and demoralising.

Reread your post and really read what you have put- he would have nothing if you weren’t there. He’s playing mind games.

What a dickhead.

PomBearWithoutHerOFRS · 06/01/2019 02:35

"no dear, without you I have one less child and a lot less chores to deal with. Off you fuck now"
Whatever makes him think you actually need him around, rather than letting him stay because he amuses you/ is good in bed/ helps around the house?

Meangirls36 · 06/01/2019 16:24

If she was being abused then telling him to fuck off could be dangerous.

Hisnamesblaine · 06/01/2019 16:26

What a arsehole

skunkatanka · 06/01/2019 16:30

Bloody hell OP that escalated quickly! Does he normally have a temper like that?

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