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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To feel all antsy and weird about moving house?

4 replies

Movinghouseatlast · 04/01/2019 12:47

It is almost exactly 2 years since our first attempt to move fell through when our buyer pulled out.

6 months later, our seller pulled out on exchange.

We found a new house to buy, but there turned out to be a restrictive covenant that meant we couldn't buy it!

We have now bought a house at last. We are going to rent out the house we currently live in. A combination of factors, mainly Brexit, have led us to this decision.

So, for 2 and a half years we didn't do much to the house as it was mostly Sold Subject to contract!

I think I also emotionally detached from it, so things didn't get done. I let the garden go a bit etc.

I loved this house so much. We have been here nearly 20 years and have done up every room. I thought it was our forever house.

We decided to move because our new neighbour raised a boundary dispute and then had an extension without getting a party wall award, destroying our garden.

We were about to do an extension ourselves, and he told us he would make our lives hell if we did. Basically, we have been bullied out. Police say it's a civil matter. I nearly had a breakdown, it was just 6 months of hell.

Anyway, we are getting the house ready for the tenants now. We have nhad new blinds and hall carpet, about to get a new dining room floor.

I love the blinds and keep feeling a bit shit that at last the kitchen is perfect and it's not for me. We have spent £5k getting the house up to a really high standard.

I feel sad leaving the kitchen I paid for with my inheritance when my mum died. We are leaving my pride and joy range cooker as we don't have gas in our new house.

We are having our last dinner party here on Saturday. I keep thinking of all the things I've never done. Stupid things, like paint a wall which is a slightly different colour. Thinking why didn't I change the blinds sooner?

I love our new house, but it needs quite a lot if work. It will be ages until it is right.

I am supposed to be choosing colours for our new kitchen (work starts on the12th!) I keep kind of trying to replicate the kitchen I'm leaving, which is nuts!

I know this house is too small and we need to move. I want to move.I need to get away from our cunt of a neighbour. I am starting a new adventure and it is exciting.

But I am a bit homesick already!

I am.just wondering if this is normal? And I know this is a first world problem...

OP posts:
kingofthemountains · 04/01/2019 13:15

I felt like this when we moved last year, even though it was a fairly "simple" house sale/purchase and didn't have the drama that you did.

The older I get, the more I realise I don't deal with change well, even when it's change of my own making. It takes me quite a while to get my head around big stuff - leaving uni/moving house/being pregnant (now!)

Now I recognise it, I let myself get a bit freaked out about stuff every now and again instead of just ignoring it and it waking me in the night.

I also talk to DH who doesn't really do emotion and he reminds me of the rational reasons we have chosen to do stuff...!

SerenDippitty · 04/01/2019 13:31

The older I get, the more I realise I don't deal with change well, even when it's change of my own making. It takes me quite a while to get my head around big stuff - leaving uni/moving house/being pregnant (now!)
Yes I'm the same apart from being pregnant! Big changes are bound to make you feel anxious.

BettyBooJustDoinTheDoo · 04/01/2019 13:34

Look at it this way, if your move was an utter disaster (unlikely) you could always go back, you have not severed ties altogether as you are renting your house out, if you look at it that way it might make you feel less apprehensive about the move. I can appreciate how you feel though, we sold our last house about a couple of months after we finished renovating it to perfection and moved to another renovation project, in all honesty those first couple of years I pined for my perfect house constantly, even though the new one was so much bigger etc I just hated it, but now after another full renovation project my house is perfection again and I adore it. My mistake was not having the opportunity to enjoy the fruits of our labour on the last house and I won’t make that mistake again. You on the other hand have already emotionally detached and you know it’s the right thing. Good luck with the move sounds like you have an exciting project ahead.

Movinghouseatlast · 04/01/2019 16:48

Thanks! I just had a real "this fucking house is so small" rant whilst cleaning it. Tripping over everything because there is nowhere to put anything.

And I thought "it's ok. I'm moving on Tuesday". Then felt bad thinking that!

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