To ask DH to book the time off work from my induction date?

[Bitchfromhell]

Ftm, being induced in a couple of days at 39 weeks due to medical complications and big baby.

DH really wants to spend two weeks off work once baby is here at home as a family (all being well).
On my induction date he intends to be with me in hospital but bring his laptop and phone and get on with work while we wait.

We've been warned it might take days. I had an examination yesterday and whilst my cervix was closed it was very soft and everything is in the right position.

Aibu to tell him to just book the time off from that day so he can support me? Or am I crazy to imagine I'll be moving along quite quickly and actually baby might not arrive for 4+ days?

Any advice, experiences gratefully received.

I'd of thought if you labour that fast he won't be interested in his laptop.

If you're gonna be in there for a while though whilst things get started then you'll probably want something other than conversation to entertain you so I wouldn't worry.

With my first DC he wasn't born until 4 days after being induced so I would say see how things go and play it by ear.

Is this your first?

You'll need him more when baby is here then in labour anyway

My husband technically worked whilst I was being induced. I needed him there for some of it - but wanted him there for all of it. My induction went quite fast - admitted in at 11, induction started at 2, baby delivered at 8pm the same day. He didn’t need to do a lot until my contractions ramped up at 6pm,( and then he was about as much use as a chocolate tea pot).
It may be better to do s he wants and to go with the flow. You’ll really want him when you are at home.

I'm assuming that this is your first? I would leave him working until you're actually home with the baby. Things went a bit tits up with my first and I ended up having a cs and staying in over a week. It would've been pointless for dh to be home while I was in hospital. Hope this doesn't cause too much concern, most people poop them out and then go home within a few hours, hope it all goes well for you.

He’ll be with you at the hospital. As soon as things get going he’ll be able to log himself off in a second. Honestly, he’ll not be delayed by. Laptop or phone.

It can take a while and if he can sit and do work then let him...take a book of iPad fir Netflix (download some stuff at home)
If it moves quickly then it will be down tools.
Good luck

POP!! POP them out (although I understand poop is common)

I’d let him work as long as his work are clear that if things move fast he won’t be able to continue.
It’ll be much more useful to have him when baby is here and while you’re being induced I’d recommend that you try and distract yourself with Netflix etc

If he can drop his work at extremely short notice then his plan is pretty sound.

As a former midwife i know unfortunately onltoo well what delays can occur.

1. No beds available for admission. Wait may be more than 24 hours.
2. No staff available to monitor you and get initial pessary started. Pessary is slow to work.
3. Ready for delivery suite but no beds or midwives available.
4. Get to delivery suite, finally get membranes ruptured and synth up but takes several hours before Labour is actually established. Obviously I wouldn’t exphim to be working on delivery suite but it could be days to get to that point.

Alternatively you could be admitted and delivered within 12 hours which happened to a friend recently.

Best wishes.

Seems unanimous Thanks, yes ftm.

Should we leave the dog at home as well? He would come back and sort her out/ contact pil if necessary.

The alternative would be to drop her at pil the night before but then (elderly and panicky) pil will need to be told about the induction which wasn't part of the plan?

Agree with Matilda, I had a delay of 48hrs+ because of point 3 on her list with both my inductions.

I went 36hrs from induction before birth. Induced at 430pm day 1, Partner was sent home first night came back about 730am day 2. Had drip and epidural about 6pm, slept till 730am day 3 partner slept on chair, baby born at 830am, on ward about 2pm. Didn't escape until 10pm day 5.

Check your induction time, chances are they won't start you until later in the day - and only if they have the space for you.

Id say if he can be flexible that's probably best.

Is this your first baby? Inductions can take a LONG time, particularly before your due date and particularly if it’s your first baby. I looked after a lady recently who was being induced on the 20th December and her baby was born late Christmas Day by emergency caesarean, her husband only had 7 days off work so she was discharged as he went back to work, felt quite sorry for her as she will have needed him more for the recovery. Depending on your hospital policy he may not even be allowed to stay on the induction bay with you and be expected to go home each night unless you are actively in labour. If he only has 2 weeks it might be best starting it when you’re in labour to make sure you have the help in the early days?

I had to be induced twice OP! (Same baby!) as the pethidine totally stopped my contractions from the first induction!

I would get the dog sorted pre-induction personally. I found that nothing happened for ages and then everything happened quite quickly with little warning - got bed on delivery suite, waters broken, syntocin started etc, and as a FTM you’ll probably want dh present for that.

I'd let him work at the hospital if he can until things actually start happening. It could take a while and every extra day he works before baby arrives is a day more he has after x

Dh says thanks to all of you. He's now gloating cos he told me so!

Can you arrange a sitter for the dog? I wouldn't leave it home alone - what if your DH can't get back for some reason?

I went in on a Tuesday for my induction and had my boy on the Friday. There was a LOT of waiting around. Unfortunately my husband started his paternity leave on the day of the induction, so by the time we got home a week later, we only had a week at home together. I’d suggest saving his annual/paternity for once the baby is here. Good luck, I hope it all goes smoothly (and quickly) x

Yes let him continue with his plan but if he's anything like my DH he will turn into a nervous wreck and be useless once you've arrived at hospital and it all becomes real. I had to send mine home a couple of hours after the pessary went in because he was annoying me.

My induction lasted 4 days. The first 2 were really boring and I sent DH home.

5 days my induction took for health issues plus big baby (estimated at 9lb - was actually 11lb).

Equally, I’ve known many for whom it gets started rapidly.

I’d say take the laptop and if it kicks off obviously he’ll drop the work.

When induction was discussed for the second I’d have gone in with someone else and called him if it kicked off so he could maximise leave afterwards.

My induction with DD took 2 days and she was born at 11.48pm on day 2 so even if DP had gone to work, he would have been there in plenty of time for active labour. I was then kept in for another 2 full days so effectively he wasted 4 days of his paternity leave which made it feel really short.