by not opening the door to DD1 friends at 8am in the mornings

[Piksiminx]

although they don't have to leave until 8.20?
I'm not being a miserable cowbag but as a childminer I have three littlies running around plus my other 2 dds and 2 over 8's some mornings to get ready for school.

DDs friend is 12, comes in, leaves stair gate open which is a magnet to the littlies so end up having to keep rounding them back up, usually whilst trying to encourage reluctant 3 yr old to eat breakfast who quite frankly would rather talk to DDS friend an do hair, remind teeth need brushing/faces need washing again. So despite numerous reminders to DDS friend not to come before 8.15 I've decided just not to open door, but aibu?

It's your house so they should know your rules and stick to them. YANBU.

Quite right once you start they will be there at 7:30 looking fopr breakfast too!

Don't think I'd have to ask him twice if he wanted breakfast! I did over hear him tell DD that his mum told him he'd got to out of his house by 8am when she's at work.....I nearly said I'd send his mum a childcare bill then!

Couldn't you tell him (not hint) in no uncertain terms that he is welcome to come in and sit down and watch TV for 20 minutes but not to traipse through the house and mess about as it distracts the other kids, and if he doesn't like it he can wait outside for dd? (Easier said than done!!!)

YANBU, by the way. Sounds like you have your hands full!

Couldn't you have a word with his mum. She may have given him instructions to go that early and she should hear it from you that it's not convenient. Might give you better results. Also, I know it's not your job or your responsibility, but is it possible that things are not ok in his own home. My best friend growing up spent a lot of time at our house because there was no food at her house. We all (including her) just thought her mom was a little odd (parents were divorced and dad was a little spacey), but realized when we were older that mother was schizophrenic and wasn't really able to look after the children.

yeeh let them come after 815as long as they know why.[ manye there mus kisk them out early