To think these were unnecessary comments?

[jigglewigg]

In the coffee shop me and DS go to, there's a very chatty barista. I wouldn't particularly say he's friendly but he gets overfamiliar and chatty with most customers.
I was sat there with DS having a little lunch the other day and he came over and asked how old I was (I'm young to have a baby), and ask if I was with my partner (which I am). He then proceeded to question me in the middle of a busy coffee shop about why on earth I would choose to have a child so young (which is fair to ask if it wasn't in such a snotty tone, I don't mind). And then continued to tell me that I've missed out on alcohol, drug taking, smoking, raves, meeting and dating loads of people - in front of a busy shop! And then finished it off with, 'oh well, you'll probably just have to start giving him over to your parents when you get bored and want your own life, most kids your age do that'! I was appalled, how unprofessional! I left straight away.
My DP thinks I should just laugh it off and that I take comments about being a young parent to heart too often.

Cheeky sod !! I also had a child young and at times I was judged . I remember once or twice being told I've missed out because I've not been able to travel but no one has ever said anything like that to me .
Like your partner said ignore don't let it upset you .

Bizarre, How old ar e you?

How bloody rude!

He's really over stepped the mark. I'd email a complaint. Cheeky sod.

I'd give them a seriously shitty trip advisor review detailing it. He'll hopefully not do it again to anyone else. Prick.

Sounds like he's a bit clueless and doesn't realise how rude he is! YADNBU

That's awful! I'd have called him out on it. I've had the odd comment (I had DD at 21, I'm 22 now) when out but nothing like that, I'd have told him where to go and probably complained.

Every question he asked was totally inappropriate and you should have told him so. Then a clear "fuck off" was in order.

He sounds like a total bitch who is used to forcing his judgemental opinions down people’s throats because people probably don’t challenge him.
Next time tell him to fuck off.

Quite honestly I would complain to the manager, that is incredibly rude.

I’d complain, that’s bang out of order.

Gosh op that is so rude! I'd have to put in a complaint. Not everyone who doesn't have children young goes on to rave and take drugs. I certainly didn't. I also haven't travelled (apart from city breaks in Europe!) Having children doesn't stop your life. For all he knows, you could just look young. I'm 26 but am aware I could pass as about 20 and also often still get IDd!

Did you tell him how unprofessional he was being?

wow, that's WAY out of order, who the hell does he think he is?

YOU paid (some of) his wages by frequenting his shop, the LEAST you would expect would be a modicum of respect for you as a customer.

In future my love, if anyone starts to talk to you like this, shut them down and tell them that thankfully, while they are entitled to form an opinion, it doesn't mean they have a right to be rude and disrespectful.

Tell him if you want his shitty opinions you’ll ask for them. Then demand to see the manager and report him for being rude to a customer.

I'm actually shocked! How rude and judgmental!

I was young when I had my first baby. I was 20 but looked about 16 and I had a few comments off strangers. People can be nasty but it doesn't mean you should just accept it. I didn't.

He then proceeded to question me in the middle of a busy coffee shop about why on earth I would choose to have a child so young (which is fair to ask if it wasn't in such a snotty tone, I don't mind).

And then continued to tell me that I've missed out on alcohol, drug taking, smoking, raves

Next time you go in there tell him that you thought about what he said; and tell him you didn't fancy working in a coffee shop all day, getting pissed and drugged up every night as your life choice. Fine if that's what he wants to do. Then tell him when your baby is at school you may get a job, go on to further education whatever you like, you are young enough to do that.

Complain to the manager! How rude of him and what an unnecessary silly thing to say.