Would this be disrespectful to DP?

[bigaba]

DP and I are in a little rocky patch at the minute. We usually spend a lot of our time together but I've asked him today to give me some space for the rest of the week so I can think straight about sorting our issues.
I never go for nights out but have arranged with a friend to go out on Saturday. Would it be disrespectful to not tell him? I feel like he's going to be a bit annoyed as I never go out and with the timing he will think I'm just trying to make a point, or trying to escape the relationship or make him paranoid etc.
It feels like I shouldn't have to tell him but feel like he'd be taken aback if he saw it on social media or something.

I take it this is a male friend? TBH I think he'd be entitled to feel pissed off

Why? Can op only be trusted to not copulate with friends who are female?

My best friends are guys.
My OH knows better than to say I can't see them, one of his best friends is female.
I don't fancy getting it on with my friends, they're like family to me.
Sorry, whilst some neanderthals do indeed think you can't have friends of the opposite sex, it still riles me when it's suggested even though the suggester isn't necessarily a neanderthal.

Your DH doesn't sound like a nice man to be with. It sounds like he has some shitty controlling ideas about what your personal rights are. I'm sorry

Well if you're constantly living in each others pockets and you never go out socialising with other people separately - then no wonder you've got issues!

@HeebieJeebies456 agree with you to be honest!

I don't think you need to tell him up front, but I also see no reason to hide it from him - currently you're having your own space, so that means doing your own thing - you don't need his permission, his ok, or even him to be forewarned.

If he gets to hear about it, or asks you and you tell him (which you absolutely should, IF he asks) and he creates about it, then it might help you with your deliberations on whether or not to stick with this relationship, which sounds pretty suffocating anyway.

Are you thinking straight about the issues or is this a 'gentle' way of breaking up? If it's the latter you should just be honest with him. easier said than done if the person in questions is a stroppy Mardy controlling husband.

I honestly don't understand how going on a night out could possibly be disrespectful? Does he control you in other ways? Maybe make his move permanent.

You don't have to tell him what you are doing.

If you don't tell him will it feel to you like you are keeping things from him? If you or he feels like you're hiding something from him (whether it's innocent or not) could it become a source of friction between you (feeling like there are secrets maybe) and possibly cause more problems?

You need to weigh up if not telling him would cause more problems than it is worth, or if telling him would be worse, then decide if you want to tell him or not.

Going out isn't disrespectful.
The fact that you consider hiding it rings alarm bells for me.
I wonder if this opportunity to go out simply arose because he is being away and giving you space. This would explain why you are feeling so guilty.
There's nothing to feel guilty about though. You need space, you need to sort things out. A night out with a friend sounds like a great opportunity to do just that and simply have some fun.
You are not responsible for his paranoia or controlling tendencies. He is.