To fucking hate sudden video calls from PILs

[RoboticSealpup]

Arghhh. I've got norovirus, look like death warmed up and they videocall us in the middle of dinner, mostly to look at / speak to 4 year old DD. This happens often. I don't speak their language so usually parrot some phrases and put on an inane smile. It feels like they just landed in our living room... I feel like a right grump. This is normal behaviour these days, isn't it?

I would hate that too - frankly, if they can see that it is the middle of a mealtime/some other inconvenient time, they should apologise, say they’ll ring back later, and ring off!

Just don’t answer.

Just don’t answer, surely it’s as simple as that

Who answers in the middle of dinner?

You don’t have too you know

My mil always video calls but I just call back when convenient.

Put a piece of tape over the camera and just say it’s not working!

My IL’s live abroad and I bloody hate it too. I find it so intrusive. I don’t answer but DH does and I end up leaving the room. They usually FT on a Sunday morning which is the one day I’m not up and out of the house by 8.20am and I get a sarky comment about ‘lazing about’ in my pyjamas.
To be honest I hate video calls full stop! I don’t want anyone to see my face when I’m talking to them.

Cut the call off and ring normally after you've finished dinner.

DH has a habit of accepting FaceTime calls from MIL when we're sitting on the sofa in the evening (fine) and then suddenly swinging the iPad round without warning so that I can 'say hello' (not fine, renders me stabby) regardless of whether I'm eating, half asleep, reading, painting my toenails...

They don't ring me, they ring DH. Maybe I should ask him not to pick up.

He keeps telling them were eating but they're from a culture where people just drop by other people's houses whenever they feel like it and mealtimes are social occasions, not private time.

I never answer videocalls, that's one intrusion too far imo. At least with a phone call you can just carry on with what you're doing mostly. Videocalls mean devoted attention.

Tell him not to pick up when it's not convenient and he can ring back afterwards.

So annoying. I feel for you. Don't answer the calls.

Well they should respect your culture and realise it’s rude to continue the conversation when you say you’re eating. Defo don’t answer next time they call during a meal time

No way would I answer if I was in the middle of dinner.

@SoyDora it’s exactl the same for us! Overseas ILs Skype on Sunday mornings. DH always answers them. I usually leave the room. They aren’t convinced I still live with the family

BareBelliedSneetch DH asked me to stay in the room the other day because he said his parents were starting to think I’d moved out!

I always vanish when the ILs FaceTime. I’m not a fan, it’s incredibly intrusive.

My DM randomly video calls, most common times are when we're at church (same time every week funnily enough) and used to be while a DC was napping. We just don't answer, and then answer an email with a better time.

DPs family do this “to speak to the baby”, never check whether it’s a good time or whether she enjoys it. They behave so manically to try and get her attention that she’s just bemused. Sodding DP always answers it. They called when I was feeding in my pjs on Christmas morning. Bloody hate it!

I hate video calls, thanks to the wisdom of MN I learned how disable it from WhatsApp and messenger (had already uninstalled FaceTime)

So glad to see I’m not the only one who hates video calling!

I always say to DH ‘go and sit by the home hub, it’s a better signal’. It’s not of course, but it gets him (and then) out of my hair. I can’t bear it - and he too swings the iPad around for me to ‘say hello’.

I hate sudden video calls, and won't answer.

If I am going to video call someone, I send them a message first to see does it suit to have a video call, that gives them time to say when it suits and be ready for a face to face chat.

I will be going abroad for hospital admission for several months in 2019, it was put off from autumn and will be relying on video calls a lot and have been practising getting used to them with friends as it will be my lifeline (skype/hangouts)

I once had a Skype call with my two nieces then aged about 5 and 2, I couldn't tell which one I was talking to. My DM accuses me of "refusing to let her see the DCs".
Face Time is better quality. I always ignore Messenger video calls as they are inevitably pocket dials.