I need a kick up the bum

[Nemo1986]

I just can't get up in the morning. I've been awake since 8am and I'm still in bed now. I'm a mature student (single, live alone) and I should be writing my dissertation. I desperately want to do it, and I also desperately don't, in equal measure. It's like I am frozen. This is what has been happening to me all week:

8am awake but brain not working I'll lie here and get up now-in-a-minute.
8:15 "maybe half past"
8:30 "Make it 9am"
9:00 "I'm going to read this news article on my phone first"
11:00 "It's really late now. I've blown it. May as well stay here till lunch and mumsnet"
12:00 "I'm not hungry"
13:00 "I hate myself".

It sounds like I am depressed, but I really don't think I am, on the days I go to work I am up and out of the house no problem. This lounging in bed is serious procrastination, but I can't seem to stop myself, and I end up with serious self hatred and motivation on the floor.

This is not how I want to start the new year.

Can anyone give me advice / a motivating kick up the bum please?

Could someone pop round and get you up in the morning on their way to work or something? Or get a study buddy through uni? Or just visualise handing in your completed dissertation and get on with it? It's obviously very boring if you're procrastinating that much- could you change your topic at this stage? Or work on rewards I.e if I get up now and work for 1 hour I can then go to the local cafe and get a fry up. If I then work til lunch I can watch 1 hour tv etc etc. Motivate yourself in a way you'd motivate someone else!

Don't think about the essay. Get up and shower and go for a walk. Do the work when you get home.

So I know you don't think you are depressed, but extreme procrastination can be a symptom of my depression. It's actually one of the ways I recognise I am depressed.

Are you behind in your work? My procrastination gets worse the more pressure I feel I'm under.

This is not how I want to start the new year.

So don't. Give yourself until Jan 2nd and then hit the ground running.

Oh god I'm so like this. Only thing that got me through my dissertation was a lovely friend who would come to my room every morning and turf me out of bed and take me to breakfast with her then to the library. We lived in halls though so a bit different!! Anyone who could even maybe come and ring your doorbell?

Leave your phone downstairs!

Just do what you do on a work day but go to a library/ cafe to study instead.

Would it help you to know I'm still in bed too ?

You need to break the "in a minute" cycle. So you need to get up and "go to work" in the same way you would if you were actually at work. It is hard to work from home, so you need to artificially create a place to "go to work" on your dissertation.

Take your computer (with internet disabled) to a cafe, and get a good hour's worth done. Once you're in the flow you'll be OK.

Thanks. Yes, I am behind with it. I would have been on schedule if I had been working since the beginning of the Christmas holidays as I should have been, but now I still haven't done the work I meant to do on the 15th December and am panicking / in denial.

Sadly I have nobody to pop round to turf me out of bed :-(
I just need some more self-control, but getting it is a bugger!

Squirrels, thanks that's a good idea. I had thought cafes were no good as a workplace, but you're right, once I'm up the main battle is won...

They're not good as a full -time option. But just to get the juices flowing in a different place, they can be freeing. You can't get distracted by research (just make a note to come back to that bit and keep writing), you have a small amount of social pressure to do something "useful" with your laptop as you sip your coffee, you've got dressed and gone out with the bloody laptop so may as well get started.

As the famous slogan says, Just Do It.

Nemo I'm also behind on my Uni work, not a dissertation admittedly, but I am currently sat in Costa having a MN break and this is the first chunk of work I've managed to get done.

How about going into Uni and working in the library?

And... I'm not replying any more because a) I don't want to encourage you to check back and b) I need to get up!

Just get up and have a shower.
Have a coffee and something to eat.
Get your stuff and go to the library if they’re open today.
Don’t think about it, just do it. Now.

Aw I get the same problem!

You need to break this task down. I am far more likely to procrastinate when I have a big unstructured task in front of me. If I have broken the project down into tasks, then it easier to take things step by step.

Accept that it won't be perfect, you won't feel perfect when doing it, and you just need to put the time in no matter what.

When is the dissertation actually due? If not straight after the holidays then you have more time to play with.

Once you know exactly how much time you have, you can break it down into manageable chunks. If it's hard to get started then begin by just planning to do a very small amount - say 100 words - it's a start and then you will hopefully feel.motivated to do more.

Thanks everyone! @Charles11 did it for me, I followed your instructions- the ‘Now’ was the crucial part!
Deadline is January 25th. I may come back next time I need a kicking (though you have all been very kind 😊)
Happy new year!

I have been a top rate procrastinator in my time. The best advice I’ve had is - you don’t have to wait until you feel like doing something to be able to do it. Just start.

It can sounds glib and simple, but it made a huge difference to me. Don’t wait until you feel like writing, just start writing and see how it goes. The task itself is rarely as bad as you think it’s going to be.

Glad I could help.

I get it. I spend so much time organising stuff for everyone else that I don’t always have the headspace for me.
Sometimes (only sometimes, mind) I need someone to just tell me what to do.

Seriously, leaving your phone in another room will change your life!