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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

AIBU to feel disappointed at this restaurant's reaction to my complaint?

75 replies

Whatadrop · 30/12/2018 21:51

DD has a food allergy.

Early December we went out for a family meal at a well known, chain, high street restaurant. I rang the venue before to let them know. We told them again when we arrived and told the waiter again when ordering her food.

On the way home from the meal DD suddenly fell unwell and it became apparent that she had consumed her allergy food during the meal. The food that was given to her was given to her in error and her allergen food had not been removed from the meal. DD was unwell for almost 10 days.

I emailed the chain immediately. It took them 6 days to respond. They said they would look into it. In the mean time I contacted the Food Agency to notify them. They said it wasn't their department and they did not deal with such situations and to instead told me to notify Trading Standards.

In the mean time I contacted the chain again for an update to which they responded they had notified Food Agency who were now investigating and they would let me know the outcome of that.

I, for some reason, feel unhappy and I can't put my finger on why. I feel they're perhaps not taking it seriously. It's now been almost a month since the incident.

OP posts:
NicoAndTheNiners · 30/12/2018 21:57

You're not been unreasonable at all.

Dd has coeliac disease and also lactose intolerant. Eating out is a nightmare, and I'm nervous for her. She can be so poorly if she eats anything by mistake.

My worry is though that if people complain (and I totally understand why you have) then restaurants will start to decide it's too much hassle to provide gluten free/dairy free stuff. But then if you don't complain they don't improve. I read about a coeliac woman who is suing a small cafe because she got glutened, sounds like via cross contamination........the cafe will just stop offering gluten free food if they're worried about legal action.

I feel so sad for people who struggle to eat out because of allergies.

NicoAndTheNiners · 30/12/2018 21:58

Oh and some chains will only allow a manager to serve dd. So Wagamama it has to be a manager who takes our order and brings our food. Makes you think they're taking it seriously which is good.

Original poster
Whatadrop · 30/12/2018 22:02

Yes it's a worry. We very rarely go out due to the stress of it to be honest. I just feel it's not worth the worry.

I do understand the point you're making with regards to the liability issue, and I really admire chains for putting the effort in with food allergies and for being inclusive with people who live with allergies.

It's really dented DD's confidence about eating out Sad

OP posts:
Original poster
Whatadrop · 30/12/2018 22:03

Yes we've had a very positive experience in Wagamamas. Sadly I read somewhere that it's since a customer was exposed in error and died after dining there as a result.

OP posts:
PowerPantsRule · 30/12/2018 22:18

It's not good enough is it? So sad that change will only come because of publicity due to untimely deaths and near misses. We eat at home mostly because of fear of contamination.

We were about to tuck into a buffet once after I had checked it was nut free. A spidey sense made me ask a passing chef and I was told that although the buffet had no actual nuts in it, they used peanut oil to fry with! You can imagine how much that dented our confidence.

TruckLoadOfSubtleGlitter · 30/12/2018 22:40

OP is it a chain?

If so I would really like to know who they are so I can avoid them.

My DS has severe allergies and eating out is a big deal for us as well.

No wonder your DD's confidence has been knocked.

Perpetualstateofchaos · 30/12/2018 22:46

You should contact the environmental health department at the local council they should investigate.

MakeAHouseAHome · 30/12/2018 22:49

What exactly did you want out of it/their response to be?

Katinkka · 30/12/2018 22:52

I would expect a total refund if it was me. OP did everything she could by telling them numerous times and then her child was ill for 10 days. I’d be bloody livid.

Original poster
Whatadrop · 30/12/2018 22:54

Makeahouse - I want an explanation as to how it happened. I want to know what went wrong and what exactly they're going to do to ensure it'll not happen again. I want reassurance. A phonecall perhaps would have been nice. An apology too would have been a bonus.

OP posts:
RitaTheBeater · 30/12/2018 22:56

So, can you tell us which chain it is? So we can strike it off the list of places to go.

sirmione16 · 30/12/2018 22:59

I've worked in chain restaurants as management. Their protocol will be to report it to their health and safety company they use - often an external company who will then follow procedure and investigate. You should then get a call from the general manager or the area manager once that's complete.

However, unfortunately a lot of chains are poorly managed at the moment and if an inexperienced manager is handling this, it'll take time and communication may be minimal whilst they figure it all out.

I'm sorry this happened to you.

Jaxhog · 30/12/2018 23:00

Allergies can be a nightmare. Some places, especially chains, seem to be really casual about allergies. I suspect it's poor staff training.

Trip adviser is your friend here. Post your experience as a caution for other people. And never use that chain again.

MakeAHouseAHome · 30/12/2018 23:00

Fair enough if that is what you wanted - and agree that id what they should have done.

I see too many threads like this though where essentially all people want is a free meal, and don't actually care if the restaursnts procedures are looked into.

sirmione16 · 30/12/2018 23:02

PS to all saying contact local council/EHO etc there's no point as for chain restaurants who have such strict procedures and (more to the point) paperwork in place - they won't touch it, chains cover themselves from every angle as they invest in legal procedure and cover. It's a business. It's only independent restaurants local authorities will assess really.

BlackeyedGruesome · 30/12/2018 23:05

pret a manger will always be known as the child killers to me and they can fuck off with their sandwiches as I will never ever risk dd's life in there.

other places we have had a really good service. (a local harvester was brilliant, also managed the autism as well)

WhyDontYouComeOnOver · 30/12/2018 23:08

I'd be going public, Facebook, Twitter, local press until they acknowledge properly. People can die from allergies and it needs to be taken very seriously.

Poodloo · 30/12/2018 23:08

I'm sorry this happened op. I'm assuming (correct me if I'm wrong) that your daughter is allergic to gluten. Which can make people very poorly. I have to say that I think people don't take caeliac as serious as it is sometimes due to the amount of people who are gluten free for a fad. I have 2 friends who are gluten free. They are not allergic. Have not been diagnosed. And its people like them that make it hard for others to take it seriously. I have a nut allergy so I will always always take an allergy seriously. But it's a sad world we live in that people are pretending they are allergic to just for a status.

Original poster
Whatadrop · 30/12/2018 23:10

I see too many threads like this though where essentially all people want is a free meal, and don't actually care if the restaursnts procedures are looked into.

Well I can ensure you I have no intention whatsoever of being in this simply for a few freebies. My DDs welfare is paramount to me. End of.

I won't name the company for now. I don't want any sort of legal fallout that has happened on MN in the past due to naming certain things/people.

OP posts:
CallMeSirShotsFired · 30/12/2018 23:10

By the by, I was in a chain pub yesterday and noticed the menu section about allergens.

Usual guff about speaking to waiting staff, but also a bold statement saying any allergen suffer should not eat anything not served on a green plate.

That sounded like such a commonsense double check, so kudos to them for some simple solutions.

Cakeandbake229 · 30/12/2018 23:11

What area are you in op?

Mrs9C · 30/12/2018 23:12

YANBU, given the sad news this year of the Pret a Manger this year and the lack of due diligence given to food allergens, it's high time all restaurants took these matters very seriously. I hope you get some compensation, thankful it wasn't worse.

BrigitsBigKnickers · 30/12/2018 23:18

Some restaurants have absolutely no idea.
My DD has a dairy allergy and one of our local restaurants was totally hopeless. They claimed on its website to cater for any allergy requirements. Her food was sent back no less than 5 times as she kept checking that nothing had been cooked in butter. The final thing was the rice where the waitress said" it's only cooked in a bit of butter I'm sure it's fine..."🤦‍♀️

Others pay very poor lip service to it. We recently visited the crypt at St Paul's for an afternoon tea for an elderly relatives birthday treat. Phoned twice to check they could cater for DD. They had clearly forgotten as were like a rabbit caught in the headlights when we turned up. DD was provided with a few tasteless sandwiches, two pieces of tofu, tinned fruit salad and some sort of weird flap jack that looked like it had been scraped off the bottom of a budgie's cage. We make all sorts of dairy free cakes , scones, brownies and cookies at home. It's not difficult and for £35 a head I really do think they could have made more of an effort. If they had told us what was on offer we would have brought something nice with us.

KateAdiesEarrings · 30/12/2018 23:22

Hmm, it's not been a month and it includes the Christmas period so I don't think it's an issue that you've not had a more detailed response yet. I'd imagine they don't want to issue an apology until they're sure they're responsible. If they apologise in advance, it's assuming liability and companies are reluctant to do that.
We have allergies in our family so I'm not unsympathetic, just being pragmatic about timescales.

wrenika · 30/12/2018 23:23

I think that if your daughter's wellbeing is your primary concern, then I would reconsider eating out. I know that sounds like an extreme option, but for the sake of health, I think it's always the best option. I have coeliac disease and I never, ever eat out. It's not worth the risk to me. I can never guarantee being safe from cross contamination in the kitchen, even if it's an educated restaurant. It takes so little. And when I boil it down to 'do I want to eat out' vs 'do I want to risk gluten', then it's always been a very simple answer for me. No meal out is worth the risk.