to ask for your help with my PND?

[Carmana]

I'm going to the doctors tomorrow because I think I have PND.

DS is 10 weeks old.

I'm feeling really down. I used to visit my mum and Dad once every couple of weeks as they live 3 hours away from me. I didn't miss them too much as I could always call them. Now I've had a baby, I can't just up and go that often as DH would be away from DS too much and that wouldn't be fair. I feel very isolated and don't have many friends around here. I plan on going to a parent and child class but haven't had a chance to.

I really think my low mood revolves around not seeing my parents often and the fact that they make it very clear that they miss DS and my dad especially is struggling with it. I am too. I miss them both a lot.

I'm a bit confused as I'm not sure how often is reasonable to spend 3/4 days away from DH with DS. I'm worried already about going back to work and not seeing my parents often. I worry about DH getting fed up with them coming to stay with us.

What routine would you suggest? DH can't really come with me as he has his DSD specific hours over a weekend (court ordered) so it wouldn't work him coming too (I don't think he would want to either).

I'm just so, so down. I miss my mum and dad and don't know what to do as there is no solution.

Please, any suggestions or advice? What would/do you do? I'm at rock bottom and not enjoying my son.

I feel horrid. I've cried about 20 times over the past 2 days.

Obvious question is why cant your parents come and see you

And 3 hours is an overnight trip not a 3/4 day trip

Focus on your parents doesn’t sound like ‘typical’ pnd but not saying you aren’t depressed.

Perhaps you need to focus on resolving this one issue then seeing what’s left over - perhaps this a wider problem about not connecting with people post birth rather than your parents.

There’s loads of drop in things you can do with a 10 month old. Try and get out even to a coffee shop and speak to someone every day.

Ask your hv for advice.

Look around your area - having a baby is a great time to get to know your neighbours - if there’s any with young kids invite them in for a coffee

So yeah book weekends in with your parents as an overnight trip and dh can come too

Sorry for short responses-typing in a hurry!

Sorry why can’t dh bring his daughter to your parents too?

I think I do have PND. I'm in tears all the time. I feel numb and exhausted. I have intrusive thoughts and am losing a lot of weight.

Not having my family around is a huge contributing factor.

He has his DD Friday-Saturday and gas to pick her up and drop her off. He works some weekends and it's really tricky to work out.

@Redskyandrainbows67 they can come and see me but they are separated so would have to alternate.

DHs family all live round here and DS is starting to recognise them. It's lovely and I'm just sad I don't have my parents nearby.

I don't enjoy anything at the moment.

You sound like you have PND. Have you spoken to a doctor?

Go and see the GP and sort out some counselling.

This tricky, exhausting, hormonal, intense part of parenting doesn’t last that long (I mean the baby stage, the first year or so) and so ask for anything and everything that will help. Tell your partner how awful you’re feeling that you’ll need your folks to visit quite a lot, and you’ll need to visit them too.

Tell your partner how awful you’re feeling and* that you’ll need visits, I mean