Disabled and parent/child parking

[Thankfuckitsfriday1]

I know IANBU but I just need someone to vent.

Part of a parenting group on Facebook and someone has made a post ranting about “no spaces for parent and child again blah blah selfish people without kids using it blah blah I had to have a go at someone and give them a piece of my mind”
The amount of entitled mums has really shocked me. Having a go and shouting at strangers over a parking space of blocking them in is just insane. Some saying only children under 10 should be allowed.

I pointed out some adults have invisible disabilities which mean they may need the spot more.
Some have children with invisible disabilities who are trends or even adults who perhaps may have autism (my son is autistic and well likely need to use them for a long time).
Some people have serious health issues which would mean walking further painful like sciatica or fibromyalgia. A friend of mine had cancer and went through chemo and was shouted at for parking in one without her child but she was too weak to walk the distance.

And the biggest shocker came when a few parents said they thought they deserved the spaces more then the ELDERLY.. apparently it’s for children and parents and not old people (even ones with walking sticks it was pointed out)... I mean what the fuck.

And it seems to be almost ALL young mums who seems so entitled. (I’m a young mum myself at 24 with two children).

Sometimes the spaces aren’t the closest to the shop - they are intended to be wider to allow parents to get car seats out of the back of the car, pushchairs out of the boot, etc.
You can get a blue badge for invisible disabilities - my FIL has one.

Its because the spaces are wider. The number of times i can't get a parent and child space and have parked in a normal space and i come back to my car someone else has parked so closr to me i actually can't get my baby in the car, its frustrating.

Lots of what you have described is reasons for people to have blue badges.

At my local tesco the parent and child spaces aren't close to the store

P&C parking should be at the far end of the car park. Problems solved.

I think people think blue badges are easy to get () and therefore anyone who doesn’t have one who parks in a p and c space is unreasonable. At least that’s the general consensus on my local community noticeboard.

In reality in our area (Norfolk) you have to be practically dead before they give you a blue badge. My son who is 6 and has severe autism (severe enough to attend complex needs school) has been turned down 3 times (he receives high rate care dla and low rate mobility so we don’t automatically qualify we have to apply to the council) and my mum who has severe copd, anaemia severe enough to require monthly transfusions, Crohn’s disease and is unable to walk more than about 6 ft doesn’t qualify either.

I hate the sense of entitlement people have about p and c spaces.

Perhaps it’s down to my area? Around here all the large stores have parent and child all directly next to the store with the disabled parking spaces. You do have to go towards the middle/back of the car park otherwise

As PP's have said, the distance to the shop isn't why the parent and child spaces are there. They are wider to allow for getting DCs and prams in and out of the car. They often also have a safe walkway to the shop.

I agree that some people have invisible illness and shouldn't be questioned about using disabled spaces but I disagree that they should use parent and child spaces. And why should people without kids use them? If you saw someone who had a child using a disabled spot or someone who hadn't got a blue badge you wouldn't think that was okay as those spaces are provided for specific individuals in need.

Disabled persons should be the only ones using disabled spots. Parents with children should be the only ones using parent and child spaces. If I can't get one it's not the end of the world but it's much more convenient and is annoying when people park there for convenience because they're closer to the shop. I think that's why most people do it and don't care. They think the only purpose of the space is for parents to be closer to the shop.

Blue badges can be hard to get or take a long time. My son has non verbal severe autism but we don’t qualify.

Some disabilities mean you need a wider space because you need to open the door fully to get in and out. My local authority specifically says that you can’t get a blue badge for this, so unless you can get a ‘normal’ space on the end of a row then your choices are either a P&C space (which are a courtesy and not covered by law like BB spaces) or go home. Being disabled (social model) is isolating, dispiriting and mentally damaging.

I'm disabled and had all the struggles of trying to get the car seat back in to the car when DS was young and people parked to close to me. I didn't have the physical ability to climb in through the other side or slip the car seat through the boot and over the back seat. I got a man to reverse my car out of the bay once, it was either that or ask him to hold my baby.

Now I've grown a thick skin, and park like a wanker. I sometimes get notes on the windscreen, not as many as I probably deserve. I always park diagonal in the bay. I'm very careful not to go over the lines. This leaves one rear door and the opposite front door with enough room to get in/out. I've had to learn not to give a fuck.

I'm disabled but unless you followed me and noticed my gait becoming more noticeable, I don't look disabled.

The amount of stares and horrid faces I get directed at me sometimes.....

I never use parent and child spots, my kids are too old for that. If I can't get a disabled space I find a regular one. Sometimes that's more of a problem than other times.

Can't bear entitled cunts who think they are more deserving of a space because of their precious Tarquin in the back seat.

I'd agree over tens don't really qualify, my youngest is four and I think in the next year or so we'll probably stop as he's getting easier to get out etc. For older kids that have special needs then they'd have a blue badge surely?

I wish people understood how hard it is to get a blue badge! Even if you meet the ridiculous criteria, you still have to fight!

We have a blue badge for DD. I tend not to use P&C spaces unless there are no disabled spaces left (which is unusual). DD still needs help to get out of the car seat so technically meets the criteria for which the spaces are intended.

My mum used to use them when travelling with my grandma. It bugged me. If a person needs additional space and to be close to the entrance, they generally meet the criteria for a blue badge. After much pushing mum eventually got her one. It’s not massively difficult here to get one if you need one. If your LA is refusing because of autism etc, then get together with others and lobby them to change. It worked in our council area.

Legally I believe if there aren't disabled spaces available blue badge holders are allowed to use p&c spaces. Happy to be corrected.

A similar issue was recently raised on my local FB page and the consensus was that anyone badge holder or not who was elderly or disabled is perfectly within their rights to use the p&c spaces. There were a few entitled, selfish, thoughtless dissenters but they were basically shouted down.

They're more convenient for parents but they're not a necessity in the way wide, close parking is for the elderly & disabled.

I'm a mother, disabled and dd disabled too. I've had comments made when I've used a p&c space when dd on crutches and needing the extra space to get in/out of car or on days when she was in pain and needing to not walk far. Again local authority very reluctant to give blue badges - my dad in a wheelchair and can't get one! We've been unable to get an answer as to why!

"For older kids that have special needs then they'd have a blue badge surely?" So you're ignoring the posts about how hard it is to get blue badges then? Also children often don't get a dx until they're older, dd wasn't dx until she started high school but had certainly been suffering prior.

Sometimes P&C spaces are better positioned for disabled people than the disabled spaces. At both my local supermarkets that's the case and the reason I park in them with or without my child. I do put my badge out though.

Another one saying it's hard to get a blue badge. I'm a blue badge assessor but I have to follow criteria set by the government, many people have mobility difficulties but I have to refuse them a blue badge because they are not severe enough.

@Mischiefinthewind

P&C parking should be at the far end of the car park. Problems solved.

Couldn't agree more! I'd be quite happy with that as then i'd have more chance of getting a nice wide space!

@Graphista

P&C spaces have no legal status. It would be up to the car park operator to decide whether BB holders could park in them.

Sorry everyone hadn't rtft and I meant to say older kids with special needs should use either but would assume they had blue badge but my phone deletes half the sentence. Sorry

Blue badges are like hens teeth. My 12 yr old has no awareness of danger and will walk in front of cars or buses. He has severe or classic autism attends a unit and he hasn't got a blue badge. New law coming in Janst st 2019 means he might get one. Sadly this change came as a child with autism and no road safety was denied a badge. He was then run over :(

@Yabbers

"P&C spaces have no legal status. It would be up to the car park operator to decide whether BB holders could park in them."

P&C spaces are a facility/service offered by the supermarket for customers use.

Accessible spaces are a legal requirement and MUST be made available, as an accessible space under reasonable adjustments criteria. You do not strictly have to have a Blue Badge, although it is commonly agreed this is the easiest way to communicate who is entitled to an accessible space.

For instance, a person with autism who is unable to cope with car parks generally and finds themselves overwhelmed, but can access the supermarket if they park in an accessible space and are then quickly escorted in to the shop; qualify to use an accessible space even if they don't qualify for a Blue Badge. As it is very much a case by case decision, it's much easier to simply say these spaces are for blue badge holders.

If someone has a broken ankle and is using crutches/walking boot, they DO NOT qualify for an accessible space. Their impairment is temporary. Accessible spaces are there to allow those in need to live as 'normal' a life as possible and access shops and services. A temporary injury is just that, you are expected to rest and recover, accept your usual daily activities are somewhat limited; and then have a little more empathy for those with mobility problems in the future.

As a P&C space is merely provided for the convenience of one customer group over another, any other customer group can attempt to use the space. It's up to the supermarket to then 'police' the spaces to ensure they are used as intended. And we all know they don't.

The only reason for a parent and child space is to allow wider access for car seats. They shouldn't be used by disabled but sometimes will be. I've learnt this over the years. As pp said if they are far away from the store entrance (the p and c spaces). Then all the issues would be a lot easier. I certainly don't mind the walk from the space to the shop. I just really don't want to scratch my or anyone else's car.

It’s strange isn’t it that the same parents who demand p&c spaces don’t want them when they’re at the back of the car park.

I dont know if you'll get much support here at the moment, ThankFuck. On a recent thread about p&c spaces it felt like the general consensus was that it is fine, positively ones moral duty in fact, to leave notes/follow people round shops and have a word with people who parked in these spaces without children.

You can get a blue badge for invisible disabilities - my FIL has one. - this means jack, many many people get turned down

Disabled parking is not accessible parking, it is soley for people with bb.
P&c can be used by people a bb and i am sure by people without a bb who need space, i assume you would just tell security why you have parked there.