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Original poster

New lodger taking

25 replies

pregnantvirgin · 30/12/2018 15:31

New lodger moved in Saturday last week. All seemed fine.

She's had a friend staying (friend only lives down the road) most of the week, as I wasn't here for Christmas. Said friend is now not staying over, but is using my bath and shower?! They've been here all day and her friend has spent a couple of hours in the bath this afternoon.

What do I say to this?

OP posts:
Original poster
pregnantvirgin · 30/12/2018 15:31

Title should say taking the piss!!

OP posts:
IDontLikeZombies · 30/12/2018 15:33

That is a bit odd, what is the lodger saying about it?

lastqueenofscotland · 30/12/2018 15:34

Say no to overnight visitors or say you’ll need to charge the friend £75 a week for her bit towards the bills Grin

FuzzyCustard · 30/12/2018 15:35

You say " I think we need to confirm the rules for lodging here." Then spell out what is and isn't acceptable and get her explicit agreement. If she doesn't like it, then she has x time to find alternative living arrangements.,

Twickerhun · 30/12/2018 15:35

‘Hello tenant we need to establish some ground rules....

krustykittens · 30/12/2018 15:35

Err, just point out she doesn't live there and has no right to be having baths/cooking food or whatever else takes her fancy! And if lodger objects she can move in with her mate!

OyOy · 30/12/2018 15:41

These threads pop up from time to time.

Landlord has one expectation, lodger another.

You should have a list of ground rules in the actual ad, reemphasise when they view and then again on the day they move it.

It's salvageable - but you need to talk though the difference between a lodger and a flat mate and be very clear on the rules.

StripeyDeckchair · 30/12/2018 15:42

As the lodger has just moved in and you've been away now is the perfect time to sit down and give her your expectations in writing.

  • When people can stay over (e.g. weekends - fri & sat - only, with 1 week prior notice)
  • How frequently someone can stay over (e.g. Max every other weekend, you don't want a future partner moving in every weekend)
  • Entertaining friends at the house (1 week prior notice, no bringing everyone back from the pub)
  • Cleaning schedule and responsibilities (to ensure you have the same expectations, or split the cost of a cleaner)
  • Leaving pocessions around the house/tidying up
  • Cooking and washing up (e.g. All washing up to be done & put away on the day the dishs are dirtied, nothing worse than someone who stacks up the washing up)
  • Washing and drying (you don't want their knickers on display all the time)
  • Car parking (if relevant)

Any other issues you think might be important or relevant.
Best to be clear now than have issues down the line.

Rosehip10 · 30/12/2018 15:53

Is your lodger middle class?

nicoala1 · 30/12/2018 16:00

Personally I would not allow overnight visitors at all. That just leads to expanding the boundaries eventually.

If someone wants someone to stay over, let them organise their accommodation so it can be done. I can never understand why it is always the lodger's house that has overnight visitors. Does the lodger never stay overnight at the visitor's house?

Sorry if I sound cold hearted, but my younger sister took in lodgers during a difficult period in her life and said NEVER again would she allow overnight visitors. Sensible I think. If lodger doesn't like it, they need to move on.

But as another poster said, ground rules should be laid down before lodger moves in. Sis didn't do this, and thus said never again!

Wish you the best my love. Take a deep breath and lay down the rules now. It is your home and your life too. You can get rid of a lodger much easier than a tenant with a lease.

Aridane · 30/12/2018 16:01

I’m g

Santaisfastasleepatlast · 30/12/2018 16:03

Invoice the friend 50% of what the lodger is paying. Cf.

nicoala1 · 30/12/2018 16:08

Santaisfastasleepatlast,

Doubt visitor would pay.

However if some home owner is kind enough to allow an overnight visitor I would accept something like 20 quid per night to cover showers and so on. Get it from lodger before visitor arrives, or put in the t+cs of the arrangement.

Honestly, hard enough to give up part of your home to a stranger, but it must be bloody awful when stranger brings another stranger in!

Anyway.

Dvg · 30/12/2018 16:18

to those saying to make it that she is not aloud overnight guests - As a landlord she is not aloud to do that as the woman is paying rent.

You CAN restrict visitations to only a couple of days a week and bathroom use etc, but cannot say no visitors welcome at all as it is now classed as her house as well (i'm guessing she has a tenancy agreement? )

I would be making a new agreement that reduces guest visits to say 2 nights a week maximum and restrict how long a bathroom can be used for (more than 45 minutes is ridiculous)

EssentialHummus · 30/12/2018 16:25

It’s different for lodgers dvg.

OyOy · 30/12/2018 16:27

Dvg to those saying to make it that she is not aloud overnight guests - As a landlord she is not aloud to do that as the woman is paying rent

Not true. That's the difference between being a lodger with a live-in landlord and a tenant.

A lodger with a live-in landlord is an "excluded occupier" no tenancy agreement needed and only "reasonable notice" for eviction.

On the flip side they should only pay one amount and not expected to pay any bills or expenses on top of that.

m.spareroom.co.uk/content/info-flatsharing/rights-for-renters-for-tenants-and-lodgers

Aridane · 30/12/2018 16:28

(glad I’m not a lodger)

RaininSummer · 30/12/2018 16:28

With a lodger you certainly can say no overnight guests if you want to and do it at the outset. They just don't take the room if that doesn't suit. The lodger's friend is just taking the pee so tell them it isn't on. Charging 20 quid for a shower would be well worth it if they were willing to pay😊

OyOy · 30/12/2018 16:29

Still fascinated by this Rosehip

Is your lodger middle class?

!?!

nicoala1 · 30/12/2018 16:35

RaininSummer

Completely agree with you there.

But TBH if it were me I would stipulate NO overnight guest at all. The guests can visit, for an evening or whatever, but NOT stay.

Them's the breaks. If lodger doesn't like it, Home Owner can get rid pretty sharpish. Two way street.

melj1213 · 30/12/2018 16:57

You should have given the lodger a list of rules/expectations when they arrived.

If not then of course they are going to push the boundaries, especially if they have never been a lodger before.

As you have been away for Christmas it gives you the perfect opportunity to sit your lodger down (now that they have settled in and got used to the place) and discuss the rules of their tenancy - including guests and bathroom usage.

Graphista · 30/12/2018 17:06

Dvg - not true for lodger arrangements at all. Landlord has final say on everything. It's not lodgers home it's lodgings - different legally. As a lodger you're not a legal tenant.

Op definitely sit lodger down and clarify terms. Cheeky lodgers friend taking advantage - heating, hot water etc is not free!

DoJo · 30/12/2018 18:43

You should have given the lodger a list of rules/expectations when they arrived.

To be fair, even if they did, I doubt the OP would have anticipated needing to tell her lodger that her guests were not welcome to take 2 hour baths!

troubleswillbeoutofsight · 30/12/2018 19:30

I've heard of landlords agreeing to a lodger having a friend stay the night for the same amount of nights that the lodger stays with the friend

troubleswillbeoutofsight · 30/12/2018 19:30

At friend's house I mean

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