Why is a trip to the walk-in centre a family outing?

[freeAnneBoleyn]

For some?

I went yesterday. Looked full to bursting when I came in, not a single free chair. Looked to be a lot of families with one sick/injured member, with both parents and other children in attendance. Why? If you have two parents why in God’s name would you drag your other child to sit amongst lurgy ridden patients for four hours and have to worry about keeping them amused as well?!

I eventually got a chair when someone else got called up- I had a fractured shoulder it turned out so not desperately ill obviously but still in pain and was anticipating, correctly as it turned out, a very very long wait.

Worst was family of five opposite- one feverish looking child asleep on mum’s lap, two older children and a dad. He’d brought sweets and sandwiches for everyone but the kids were bored shitless which led to the inevitable handing over of a phone to mess around on with the horrible pingy sounds of the game they played audible to everyone. Another toddler was left to just roam about, and started running up and down.

It made for an even more unpleasant waiting experience for people who are in pain and sick, exposing healthy children to germs, and bloody boring for them too.

I am NOT judging any parent that had no choice to bring other children along, but if there are two of you...why do it??

There’s a huge difference between regularly visiting a long term sick child in hospital to maintain a sense of normalcy, love and raise morale and an entire family turning up at an emergency healthcare centre because a kid has an infected thumb or a temperature.

Well I’m sorry Nothing that your mom didn’t visit (genuinely - not snark) I would have wanted my mom so understand that could have been hard.

My first ever visit to A&E was when DD was about 2. About 11pm, on a Friday. Super fun.

We went straight past normal A&E to the paeds A&E to find a teenage girl, prob 16 ish, who was steaming drunk and had fallen over and broken both wrists, alternating screaming with pain and laughing hysterically. Accompanied by both parents, a grandmother and 3 siblings. They must have taken two cars, FFS.

Saw this at A&E today.

As I pulled into the car park, one of the empty spaces was being blocked - for a second family car to pull in next to them.

EIGHT people in total (4 kids, 4 adults) toddled off into A&E. I left shortly afterwards as I was taking my dad and his wife who don’t drive, there was no way I was hanging around there for several hours. Who would WANT to, anyway? It’s mind boggling.

Maybe these places need a policy of patient plus one only, unless there are childcare problems!

Well this is it querty I just don't understand this hyper judgemental stuff.

I do agree that people who are healthy taking up chairs is shit > see my example with the antenatal clinic as well for this! But other than that I just find it all a bit, well, unpleasant really.

Live and let live and all that.

I think it's a natural response to stress though which is why threads about any public services that are crowded and you don't really want to be there seem to be very similar (kids badly behaved, why are they there, seating is a blue touchpaper issue, etc etc).

I suppose I look at people like that and think it's nice that they are close as well, maybe.

The outrage and anger seems OTT.
Yes the seats thing is shit.
But other than that, take a magazine, take some headphones and try and tune it out.

TBH if I was injured I think my DH would want to stay with me, he is soppy and a worrier. This would mean the kids coming too.I don't think he'd want to leave me in pain on my own.

Note - we haven't actually done this, we haven't needed to, thank god!

Of course I could tell him to fuck off and he would but he'd look like a kicked puppy!

It's not come up though so that's good.

I do always think if you’re well enough to be enjoying an M&S sandwich picnic in A&E you probably don’t need to be there.

As to the walk-in question, I just don’t get it either. If only there was a hand-held telephonic device that we could all carry to contact our other parent to come and collect us. I’ve never been seen at the walk-in in under 2 hours, that’s a long time for little bored kids,

I don't think anyone's 'outraged' but I agree it seems odd and a bit selfish to bring along whole families to walk-in centres when people need seats - I see it quite often. I suppose in A&E people might all want to be there to make sure the ill/injured person is OK and supported, but even so a bit unhelpful. But agree we don't know people's circumstances so who knows, there may be reasons people need to take everyone

Echo it ups the whole drama value. I know that won’t be a popular view, but I am really beginning to think this is true when it comes to NHS services.

I don't drive so if we go we all go. Poorly child usually wants me plus if they're poorly enough to go there they need looking after in the car. Taking stuff with you is called planning! We all know it's boring and kids will get hungry etc. I obviously make sure my children respect the other patients but I do think generalising in this way is rather rude! Who really enjoys A&E/out of hours anyway 🖕🏻

Oh I had this the other week. Doctors closed for the weekend but needed a certain medication so not an emergency. Dh drove me and dropped me off. A family mum, dad, three children arrive, mums cut her hand washing up yet everyone stays. The children bored and unruly.
Compared to the poor mum there alone presumably single mum or no childcare trying desperately to keep her children entertained. I felt sorry for the mum alone I was pissed off with the family. They where not the only family who arrived in similar style and yes I know what was wrong with them as you know no privacy when checking in.

This happened to me I was sent to a&e by gp not v well at all and waiting to see triage nurse and a whole family of adults and teens about 10 of them were waiting for a mum (about 50) to be seen all taking up the chairs and all v loud - eventually asked to move by a sister but all refused as their mum was important! Was unnecessary and rude

I don’t drive either. Still wouldn’t let that be a reason why my entire family had to be hauled in with me.

I’d walk, get public transport, taxi or a life depending on what was manageable and appropriate.

*lift

I work in a hospital and its actually a real problem. Everywhere is short of space, A&E's and walk in centres terribly over crowded.. Yet you often see three generations of the same family turn up for one sick person.
I unfortunately had to visit A&E 3 times recently. Each time I got a taxi there while husband looked after the kids, and I kept him up to date with texts.

I've no experience of non-emergency walk-in centres, but when my DS was young he was a frequent flier at the local Children's Hospital A&E for a range of reasons.

It was very common for large, extended families to come along with one child, who more often than not was there with a minor injury or ailment (I know this because having been triaged, other patients who arrived later were often seen before them). They took up loads of space, children played and cried, adults would keep asking staff when they'd been seen etc. I could never understand the appeal of a long day or night out at A&E myself, but it seems to be a popular option for a surprising number of families.

Plus, would you want your other "well" children exposed to all the other bugs in the waiting room? I'd avoid taking extra kids based on that.

"I don't drive"... so hubby and kids all had to go... Here's an idea. Everyone piles in the car, poorly person is dropped off, family go away. Ring for help or get a cab home when released. (Which has never been less than 3 hours after arrival when I've been unlucky enough to go to A+E, and I'm a fast track patient).

Or parent and child are dropped off and the rest of the family go away. Even if it's too far to go back home, there's got to be better places to take your kids than A+E for a few hours.

Two I saw one very busy Friday night, in the children's A&E which at the time was tiny and had about 12 chairs.

Girl (aged 17yo-know her age because she had a strop at being sent into the children's one) with: Brother, both parents, 2 grandparents and an aunt. She had cut herself on the leg. Mildly. By the time she saw the triage nurse it had stopped bleeding and didn't even need a plaster. I know that because the whole lot insisted on going in to the triage nurse where they couldn't fit in so held the door open and we heard every (slightly sarcastic) comment from the nurse repeated by grandma at volume because grandpa couldn't hear it all.

Same evening mother who came in about 10pm with about a 8yo who'd fallen out of bed and broken her arm. No problem. Except she'd brought younger brother. Don't know how old but he was in school uniform. Apparently granny had come round to look after him and an older one but "he'd begged so hard she just had to bring him". Little girl was rather sweet. He otoh was dreadful.
He started by collecting all the (few) toys and attacking any other child who had any.
Apparently this was "cute and he was so tired so can you just let him have them".

About 11pm he'd reached the whinge and moan stage of tiredness. This didn't mean that he'd let any other child near the toys. This meant he spent the next hour banging the toys together loudly shouting "I'm bored/hungry/thirsty...."

After around an hour of this, mum disappeared in search of something to eat. She reappeared with a can of coke which she proceeded to pour into a bottle and give him. It didn't improve the situation for anyone.

Yes we judged.

But the one I felt sorry for there was the little girl. She was there, in pain, and she had her brother refusing to let her have any toys/magazines etc, mum's attention was fully on him. And when they decided they would need to admit her (needed an operation) mum decided she'd have to leave her on the ward as they wouldn't (rightly) let the brother on so she had to take her back. She said she'd be back after the operation, late morning.

This was a time this little girl deserved to be centre of her mum's attention.

That was a very long night. I was there 8 hours with ds before he was discharged. (they wanted to keep an eye on him, but he wasn't bad enough to be admitted)

I was scared, I didn't know what was wrong with me. I was in intense pain and I didn't want to be alone, so I wanted my partner to stay with me. He had to bring our child (luckily just the one at the time) until he could arrange childcare.

I nearly died and had to have emergency surgery. I'm glad he was there. I would have hated to be alone, in agony, trying to take in what the doctors were telling me.

Perhaps Mum couldn't drive so needed Dad to?
Dad still could have taken other kids somewhere whilst she waited though.
Kids are terrible at sitting and waiting - unless you have a teenager who can happily read a magazine.

regmover you're still insistent that

While you had invaluable help from your partner when you went to the hospital that you would have struggled without

For people with any children, they should not have this support and help from theit partner, the help that you deemed invuable, as they must immediately leave with their kids and leave their partner alone even if they are in a right state.

I find it really weird that you can't see how bad that sounds!

You have said,well I don't have kids, it's only one extra person. As soon as there's a kid on the scene nope you've gotta get out of there and as you said earlier if no car walk "somewhere".

Can you really not see how crappy that is?

Like this PP

"I was scared, I didn't know what was wrong with me. I was in intense pain and I didn't want to be alone, so I wanted my partner to stay with me. He had to bring our child (luckily just the one at the time) until he could arrange childcare. "

She wanted her partner there, that meant the kid had to be there. Like you wanted your partner there.

It just seems so massively hypocrticial to deny on some kind of moral high ground, the assistance and help that you had, to someone else, becasue they have a child...

You really aren't on the moral high ground here with your ideas TBH. Not from where I'm sitting.