To change child minder

[Londonlife85]

I've been unsure of the childminder for a bit now. Basically my faughter doesnt have milk in the day any more and I've expessed this to her but she still gives ny daughter milk. And finally the last day before christmas, I picked her up and she had been crying for about 30 minutes, there was only 2 older children still there age 5+ who were playing a game nicely, so I dont understand why she had been left to cry. Aibu to change child care for these reasons, she only goes 1 day a week atm but as soon as she sees the building she starts screaming. Im thinking of changing to a nursery for 2 days a week. What would some of you more experienced parents/childcare workers say?
Btw my daughter is 15 months.

So the childminder has an assistant and it was the assistant that told me, after the kids said shes been crying all day, she said 'not all day' but on and off during the day

Sounds like your DD is out of sorts if she has been crying on and off all day. She could be teething or coming down with something. Did the assistant say she has been crying for 30 minutes and we’ve just ignored her?

I would change, nursery would expose her to different children and more than 1 carer. They run a variety of programs and expose children to different things.

What do you think childminders do weenurse?

The other children said she's been crying all day, they are usually very honest!
You need to speak to the childminder though, and it could be she is unsettled if she has had time off over xmas, even harder to resettle with a break.

no advice with the cm as ive never used one but your best bet is dont see the hv anymore,you dont have to have them they are a optional service

15 months is still a bloody baby,very bad advice given there,so what if she on the high end milk is still very much needed at this age, maybe not formula but cows milk instead,calcium and vitamin quota is very needed at this stage

I agree you've had bad advice from the HV. Can you ask to get a second opinion from another HV?

would change, nursery would expose her to different children and more than 1 carer. They run a variety of programs and expose children to different things.

Oh ffs. Yeah the kids I look after sit in a room all day with no contact with anyone except me, oh and I usually separate them so they are completely alone. We don't go to parks, kods groups, softplay, we went to activities in the house or have parties for special occasions. You are right nursery really is the only option, childminders are shit incapable. 🤨

Maybe the other children are having milk and your lo is having it at the same time. I’d just ask your childminder how they’re dealing with her when she’s unsettled. Also one day a week isn’t great for settling. I love childminders as a setting but you need to have trust and feel 100% confident in them.

As for the milk thing, we don’t know op was given bad advice. Maybe her lo wasn’t eating much solids when she was told to reduce milk, lo could’ve been having6 bottles a day at 12 months and not eating solids. Let’s not discredit professionals without facts. And yes I do know some give poor advice.

If your dd gets comfort from her bottles of milk wouldn't it make more sense for to have a bottle at the childminders? Its one day a week, hardly going to impact on her weight. Such a restriction seems cruel to your child and unfair on the childminder.

@Nicknacky
christmas How do you know there was no contact when the baby was crying and she was just left? - I presume this was directed to OP and not me? I was giving my view on how I would feel if my child had been left (which she hasn't)

And I left my kids longer to cry than 3 minutes. It can’t be helped when you have an older child and need to see to them too. - maybe that is true for you but in my life the time limit tends to be around 3 minutes as I stop what I'm doing and provide comfort, this is what I'm comfortable with and I'd be expressing my wishes regarding timescales (amongst other things) to the childminder to confirm this was something they could manage. No way would I accept 30 minutes, or even 10!! I do understand it's harder with siblings but I don't think my child should suffer in a paid for environment.

Go look at nurseries. You don’t trust her, you don’t trust her.

2 bottles of milk a day is absolutely fine for a 15 month old - they only need about 12oz total!

christmas I’m referring to your post where you said you wouldn’t want them left. The op hasn’t said her child was left to cry.

A childminder has more than one child to look after. They can’t provide instant comfort every single time, and if that is so important to a parent then childcare isn’t for them.

I knew my children and I knew their cry’s. Wingeing in a cot with a tired sleepy cry? I left them.

A scream because they had hurt themselves? I would react quickly.

@Nicknacky yes I did say I wouldn't want them left, I went on to say also that if comfort wasn't helping then investigation would be expected (by me, for my child, and the childminder I chose would accept this or I'd look elsewhere). That's what I find acceptable. I don't know what happened, that's why I detailed what is acceptable to me in any instance and so giving the op an idea of what others (ie. me and other posters) would find acceptable.
Also, I don't expect an instant response to crying (unless it's medically required etc) but I think 3 minutes is enough time to have to make a distressed child wait for comfort, again my opinion for my child.
These are my views on my child. I wanted to outline them for ops sake to give an idea of what others find acceptable. I'm just a bit confused as to why you feel you need to address my post at all.

Why don't you look around local nurseries and get a feel for what they offer? My DS absolutely adores his nursery and it's made going back to work so much easier. I drop him off in the morning and he just smiles and toddles off. He seems to have the best day of his life every day he goes.

It's extortionate though.

I would look at other options as she sounds very unhappy there.