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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To ask if anyone has made a major career change in their 40s?

31 replies

KM99 · 29/12/2018 19:55

It's been weighing on my mind for most of 2018.

I've worked in the corporate sector for 20+ years. Paid well and until having my DS (now age 5) I had a lot of job satisfaction and career progression was very important to me.

Now I feel unsatisfied, tired of corporate bs and want to do something that plays more to my people and coaching skills. And honestly, gives more back than just helping companies make money.

Have any of you made a big change in your 40s? How did you go about it? What did you have to sacrifice?

I know I'm very lucky in the job I have as it gives me lots of flexibility as a working parent, good benefits etc. And I've been able to tell myself that since having DS so I don't rock the boat.

But now I feel the daily stress, anxiety and ironically the sometimes boredom of same old politics and situations is dragging me down. I also think if my hearts no longer in it then someone younger and more hungry for it deserves the job.

Talked a lot to my OH about how we could make some life changes such as downsizing so I can make changes (I'm the major earner in the house).

Would love to hear your experiences if you are willing to share.

OP posts:
caddywally · 29/12/2018 23:01

I have nothing useful to add to this but am also interested, so giving the thread a bump!

Els1e · 29/12/2018 23:11

Sorry to offer no use advice but to go for whatever makes you happy. Yes, have changed jobs/careers several times to fit in with the lifestyle I want at the time

DobbyLovesSocks · 29/12/2018 23:12

My DH changed career last year aged 41. Went from shift working security officer to a 9-5 payroll advisor. It has meant an initial
Pay cut which we will claw back with pay progression (nowhere he could go in other role) but the difference it has made to our family life is immeasurable. He is also currently working on his foundation degree. It's not been easy financially as we moved house the day he got his interview invite but we've coped

Holidayshopping · 29/12/2018 23:13

Retraining can be a really great idea.

Just don’t go into teaching!

Cadburyssurpriseegg · 29/12/2018 23:15

Just don’t go into teaching

Confused oh shit

Oldstyle · 29/12/2018 23:18

I was forced to change by a voluntary/not voluntary redundancy in my 50s. Loved the old job and spent a couple of months sulking but it was ultimately the best thing that could have happened to me. Much less money but so fulfilling and wonderful to be learning new stuff / meeting new people / feeling energised. My partner had the same experience - moving from the corporate sector to self-employment. Rubbish money but really happy. Go for it!

BearFoxBear · 29/12/2018 23:25

I'm thinking of doing the same, so following for ideas! Changed jobs in the profession I've been in for almost 20 years a few months ago and I hate it, so I think its time to make a serious change.

ihatethecold · 29/12/2018 23:30

Yes. My job was Tupe’d into Poland in the summer of 2017. After 12 years I’m now training to become a counsellor.
I love the course and losing my job was a blessing in disguise.

ilovesooty · 29/12/2018 23:32

Yes, when I left teaching.

Jessicabrassica · 29/12/2018 23:32

I'm doing it and dh has done it. his changes made me the breadwinner and then I went back to uni. Financially things are tight but we've had 3 years of both of us being around in school holidays etc, I've been able to do the school run and I've spent a lot of time volunteering in school too which I have loved.

Wrongintherightway · 29/12/2018 23:34

Yes at 42 I decided to leave company I had enjoyed a good well respected career for over 13 years and move up a completely different sector

Lasted nearly 3 years and moved back to field was previously working in as decided that life should start to get easier not harder

Positives - I learnt loads and was a better person for it

Negatives - bloody hard work and very competitive with younger more than experienced people

Do I regret it, no would I change how I did it, yes but would still do it

Original poster
KM99 · 30/12/2018 05:30

@ihatethecold I've enrolled into an Introduction to Counselling course in January 😁

OP posts:
EdithDickie · 30/12/2018 05:37

DH was made redundant in his mid 40s and was initially convinced that no one would want him. He'd been in his job (stock control, book keeping etc) for 20 years. Anyway, he ended up actually thinking and what he wanted to do and retrained as a preschool teacher specialising in providing one-to-one support for children with SEN. He absolutely loves it.

daisychain01 · 30/12/2018 05:48

Now I feel unsatisfied, tired of corporate bs and want to do something that plays more to my people and coaching skills

IME making any kind of viable living from 'life coaching' can only be done when you're in a corporate role already, drawing a salary and do the coach/mentoring as an additional branch to your skills.

Unfortunately the market is flooded with life coaches who have been made redundant from years in corporate so already have a decent pension and paid off their mortgage with their redundancy, so can afford to do the coaching for fulfilment not to pay the lion's share of their bills.

However if you want to escape corporate bs, and you don't need a steady stream of guaranteed income, it would be a fulfilling use of experience gained from a corporate career.

PossiblyPFB · 30/12/2018 08:19

Suggest if you’re desperate, you retrain whilst employed if poss.

Also, do not minimise the importance of the flexibility, familiarity and good pay that you have where you are. The grass isn’t always greener & stability and flexibility with a young child is important ! I speak from experience.

ihatethecold · 30/12/2018 08:23

@KM99
That’s great. I loved doing the intro course. I then did level 2 and I’m now halfway through level 3.
I cannot tell you how much I love learning on my course.
It’s helped me so much personally as well as academically.

NaturalBornWoman · 30/12/2018 08:46

I did but I went the other way. I was a nurse, then a SAHM until my youngest child was 12. My ex husband had an affair and I went and got an office job. I was part time at first, then quickly went full time for a promotion, and after redundancy moved to a different company, did training along the way and now I'm in senior management.

TidaQuel · 30/12/2018 08:50

I’m also following, also mid forties and in need of a change. Was made redundant from my long term, customer service role that was part time shifts and reasonably well paid. Full time office based role now with lots of targets and for me, it doesn’t give anything back. I want to feel a sense of helping someone, making a difference. Not sure what to do though as only educated to a levels.

spanieleyes · 30/12/2018 08:51

Went from SAHM to Headteacher in 12 years!

OliviaStabler · 30/12/2018 08:58

I didn't retrain just went back to a job I'd been successful at 8 years earlier after a detour into a niche role. Was terribly difficult and this year has been very hard work wise. I was told that, as I has not done the job in the last 5 years, I was 'almost unemployable' by one recruitment consultant. I could prove I've been using the same skills but no agency cared. I finally found a role and have been very successful in it but it was a hard slog.

However I do appreciate that some jobs / industries are in demand and criteria will be different.

Sorry to put a downer on your thread but so many people told me I'd have no trouble getting a role with my skills set. The actual reality was very different.

Auntiepatricia · 30/12/2018 09:02

My DH did. He took a huge payout from a seriously senior corporate role to retrain and work in an area that was for the greater good. It turns out that even vulnerable people can be horrific people. The stress of dealing with the people he wanted to help and the bad outcomes for everyone has made the move a disaster so now he’s sidestepping into something he thought he’d never want to do but that he excels at. To be honest DH is a very rare person and very talented at what he does but he couldn’t make the ‘idealist’ job work without destroying his health and our family. What he is doing now will lead to amazing things, he’s already been mentioned in the news a few times in the last few weeks. But my point is be very very careful of romanticising helping people. As you see daily on here it’s rare to find someone you can help, even if you offer them you heart and soul. Many of the people who in theory need it the most will just take take take and shit on the help they do get.

70sbaubles · 30/12/2018 09:06

I changed early 30s. Manageable I was still seen as young but experienced. Now at 40 Im fat, old and past it and look like a middle aged mum with no value. I need something more practical but Im too old to be of use to anyone. And I was very capable once.

MsJaneAusten · 30/12/2018 09:07

Following as I’m considering this. I’m currently a teacher and considering retraining as an educational psychologist.

MsJaneAusten · 30/12/2018 09:08

need something more practical but Im too old to be of use to anyone. And I was very capable once.

What?! Have a word with yourself! 40 isn’t old and I bet you’re still capable.

proudestofmums · 30/12/2018 09:10

Not quite that old but I did in mid 30s when I realised that after the birth of. DS I didnt want to go back to my old job/working world. Luckily the degree I had enabled me to change career entirely and it was the best thing I ever did for various reasons, which I don’t want to sound smug or obnoxious about but they mattered to me at the time - hugely increased money, higher status and much more intellectually challenging. Ive now retired and looking back I am so glad I didnt go back to my dead end, brain stultifying job after DS was born.

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