DH and I have had difficulties with his parents since we were teenagers and he felt they were too controlling and particularly after he decided to move in with me instead of return home after university.
We had massive issues when we were planning our wedding, as they expected DH's sister's wishes to take priority over mine, whixh we had to concede to in the end.
I, and my family, have tried really hard with them, but everything is a competition to them and no matter what I do, they have to outdo it.
For years, I've tried not to let the comments get to me and I've had to stop complaining for the sake of my DH.
They can be cleverly designed to sound more tactless than anything and like I could be choosing to be offended, but are hurtful and personal. One memorable comment was after them being told in confidence about something traumatic that had happened to me (so DH had someone to share with, not so that they would discuss with me) was for MIL to bring up the harrowing subject in a round about way and go into detail about what she'd 'read' and what she thought about it, despite knowing I knew that she knew I'd just about survived it!
The latest at Christmas, after finding out that I'd started a new job and been constantly criticised bullied out after a matter of weeks, and despite my confidence being at an all time low had secured another new position, was to sarcastically comment on the fact I was 'working my way around' employers to another family member.
Cutting contact is not an option, as my DH would not forgive me. Am I right to think I shouldn't keep putting up with the remarks or should I really just let them think they're not registering? No idea how to say what I want to them without sounding like I'm dredging up lots of little insignificant issues that I didn't pull them up on at the time.