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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

WWYD-blended family christmas presents for the kids

9 replies

Whatshouldonedo · 28/12/2018 18:00

This is more of a what would you do type scenario; DH and I aren't sure of the best approach

Going to see DH siblings next week for a late Christmas get together; his siblings are always very generous toward our children and have bought some lovely gifts over the past few years.
Between the siblings they all have their own children who are now in their teens, however one sibling has step children from their partners first marriage.
These children split their time between DH's sibling + partner's house, and that of their own mother

Next week all children will be there

The issue is this; I feel that we should get all the children the same gift- we were thinking of giving them all some cash. DH feels that his siblings step children are exactly that, step children, and therefore he wouldn't necessarily think to get/give them the same. For context the step children are also in their teens

My feeling is that we are there for a family Christmas get together and DHs sibling and their partner have been together since the children were still in nappies so it's not like it's a new relationship. If I was one of those kids I would be gutted to see one of my step cousins getting a gift of higher value to me because I think children really pick up on stuff like that and it seems a bit mean

In short, I think all or nothing for each child but DH isn't convinced

WWYD?!

OP posts:
checkingforballoons · 28/12/2018 18:02

I think they should all be treated equally too.

hazell42 · 28/12/2018 18:03

You're right. It will be awful. Especially noticeable of you give cash. Don't do it. They will be very hurt

Redken24 · 28/12/2018 18:03

Yup all or nothing I agree with you. Will mean no bad blood.

WhatWouldLeslieKnopeDo · 28/12/2018 18:04

They should definitely be treated equally.

whatstheplanphil · 28/12/2018 18:04

Yep you are correct in my opinion they should all get the same .

Birdie6 · 28/12/2018 18:04

They are his sibling's kids , really. I wouldn't keep thinking of them as step kids after all these years together. I'd insist on getting them the same gift as the others - I couldn't sit there watching them all opening their gifts, knowing that I'd short-changed some of them because of being "steps".

loubluee · 28/12/2018 18:05

I think they should all be treated the same. They are family now. Also you are right children do pick up on these things.

lalaloopyhead · 28/12/2018 18:06

Treat them all equally. DH's DD is grandparent to 8, only 2 are actually biologically related - they are all treated exactly the same by all of the family, I think it would be rather sad if they weren't.

NChangeForNoReason · 28/12/2018 18:09

Treat them all equally ... it's the nice (and right) thing to do!!!

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