To ask if you've ever been contacted by the new girlfriend?

[Livingwell2019]

Just that really. If you've been in a abusive relationship, have you been approached by your ex's new girlfriend? We all live and work in the same area, and I have DCs with him, so I know sooner or later she will reach out to me asking why we split etc, when shes seen his true colours. He mentally and emotionally destroyed me. Even when I moved out, it still took me a while to relax, and not walk around with a knot in my stomach.

I would try not to worry about anticipating contact, it’s no way to live and I’m sure it’s stressful. She may never get in touch with you at all. If you are worried and don’t want any contact, you can preemptively block her on any social platforms you are aware of

The only contact I had from abusibe ex’s new girlfriend was when she called me to tell me that he wouldn’t be paying me back the money he owed me; he’d spun a story about how he didn’t really owe it to me and that’d I’d left him out of the blue for no reason (I did leave “out of the blue” for my own safety for very good reasons) and she was fairly nasty to me saying I was a psycho etc due to what he’d fabricated about me just in case I tried to tell her the truth.
I doubt she’ll approach you; it never occurred to me to approach any of abusive ex’s ex partners; in part I was too scared that’d it’d turn out he was perfect while with them which is what he told me. Unlikely though.

I spoke to my now ex Partners. exwife. About a year after we split. I asked their daughter (who I was in touch with) if her mum would talk to me , she called me and it was a wonderfully cathartic, honest, affirming conversation for us both. They split 13 years before I met him, and she had hoped he’d changed ... he hadn’t. She understood me like no one else could, and said that talking to me had validated her experience too.

Yes, she contacted me after he’d stormed out and ignored her for a few days after accusing her of cheating (because she didn’t answer her phone three times in a row). I left him because of his emotional and physical abuse and confirmed this was the tip of the iceberg and to get the fuck out now.
Reader, she married him😔

I doubt you will be contacted to be honest. Try and move on.

No. but it prepares me well for dating being on the other side.

When a guy talks about his ex I really read between the lines and I'm pretty good at discerning the difference between normal frustrations in a divorce and abusive man.

I don't see why she would reach out to you? Did you reach out to his previous ex? It wouldn't cross my mind to talk to a partner's ex

You've done well to get out of it OP, I would just focus on yourself now and try not to worry about the past.

I've both had contact with the exes of, plus contact with the new partner of an ex of mine. He was a real piece of work. People like him rely on their exes and current partners hating each other enough to not talk because if they talk, the lies come out and the carefully woven bullshit of the abusive gaslighter come undone.