Too not let my DD2 see her friend this week?

[Nctoprotecttheguilty]

So, for background, DH & I both work full time. We have 2 DDs (8 & 11) and only minimal local family help to cover school holidays etc (PIL have them 1 day a week during the hols). As a result, DH & I have between us have to use most of our annual leave to cover the school holidays. This means that we are rarely all off together as it is either DH & DDs off or myself and DDs, rarely all 4 of us together. Two exceptions to this are 2 weeks in the summer holidays where we get to have our annual summer holiday together and the week between Xmas and New Year where I try to make sure we do stuff together as a family.

This year, however, DD1 (11) wants to go shopping with her friend tomorrow, spend the night at her friend's house and then get us to pick her up about 5 on Saturday. I've said no as I'd had visits to local attractions arranged for those days and, also, there is no reason why DD1 and friend can't do this next week when DH has gone back to work (friend and her DM have both confirmed they are free next week). Dd1 now, however, has a face like a slapped arse.

IABU to expect her to spend this week with the family or should I let her go. I know she's of an age now when she is going to want to do more with her friends and get some more independence but I don't think asking for 1 week when we're all together is too much to ask, and, as I said, she can do all this stuff next week when DH is back in work.

Another aside, if we do let Dd1 go with her friend tomorrow then we will not be able to do the activity I had planned for tomorrow as it is quite far away from home and I wouldn't feel comfortable being that far away in case DD1 needed us for any reason.

Can you not compromise and pick her up earlier on Saturday?

I would let her go in your place. But that is because I would imagine a sulky child being dragged around tomorrow if you forced it.

Forced family fun is the worst. A few days yes but an entire week is ott in my opinion.
It sounds like its more about you than your kids.

Let her go. That's what she wants to do in her holiday.

And what do you imagine is going to happen to her if you're a fair way away? Isn't she being cared for by her friend's family?

You could offer to take the friend along, we have done that before.

Let her go with her friends she is entering into the time in her l7fe when fear of missing out will overrule family time if you say no she will sulk and have a miserable time with you anyway pick her up in the morning.

In this case I’d let her do it the following week provided that she doesn’t walk around with a slapped arse face in the meantime.
The sleepover may be what she wants to do but why should that come at the expense of her sibling having a day out when she can see her friend the following week anyway? She needs to learn that her wants aren’t the only ones that matter.