I will start out by stating that mh which has been diagnosed and where the sufferer knows their issues etc is not what I’m referring to here.
Relative is in their 70’s. They have had mh problems all their life but although she’s on AD’s she’s never had a formal diagnosis and and she stops and starts her medication according to how she’s feeling.
I suspect she may be bipolar but obviously I’m not an expert, but she has extreme highs then extreme lows and she has delusions i.e. imagines that people are talking about her etc etc etc.
She rang recently to tell my parents that a family member had died, only for it to transpire that they were still alive.she has no empathy and will ring to make an enquiry about something only for it to end up with her talking about her life, her day, etc etc...
Anyway cut to the weekend and we all got together. She was incredibly high from the outset, as the night wore on she became more and more insulting and crass, until she was asked to stop due to there being small children around.
She started screaming and swearing, stormed out, and hasn’t been heard from since.
I will add here that she does have a dh and grown up children so we know nothing has happened to her since. Currently those who know her well say she will likely crash now and not want to speak to anyone for a few weeks, and then she’ll get back up on a high.
Thing is this is a pattern, and family have been putting up with it for years.
On the whole I don’t have much to do with her, but there’s a few events she’s arranged in the next few months which she expects all her family to attend, and by God she will bitch and complain if they don’t. But I’ve had enough of it. I really don’t want to attend another event of hers which ends up like the one at the weekend, and I am absolutely sick of the way she treats other members of my family, although their responses are their own.
I could just make up an excuse as to why I can’t go and won’t likely see her again any time soon. On the whole I’m not a fan of this notion of just going NC, but on the other hand it’s not fair that everyone has to walk on eggshells because of what her possible reaction will be, and I’m really minded to tell her that after her performance the other night I just really don’t want to go and won’t put myself through it again.
I realise this is emotive, but by the same token there are posts on here all the time from people who say their parents are narcissistic/addicts/have this and that diagnosable mh issue, so how do you draw a line at where someone’s mh affects the people around them and where it’s ok to walk away because of it?