Oh pissed shouting at me at his mum and dads

[happynewyear19]

OH and his dad and brother went to footie today and pub after, out all day from 1-9 I've just come upstairs now because I'm knackered ready to get into bed I've had dd and ds all day playing with there nephews exhausting!!!

He goes are we having her tonight or is my mum I goes you can have her you've been out all day I'm knackered and your mum must been knackered cooking catering for everyone all day.
He's just shouted at the top of his voice so his parents can hear "she's not a fucking little doll she's not a fucking chore you can't just pick and choose I wish I never had her with you" making me sound awful.

Yet he came in from the pub I asked him to hold her for a little bit and he didn't even want to hold her her.

Surely I'm not being unreasonable asking him to feed her if she wakes up in the night she's been sleeping through anyway!

He sounds awful, but if he’s spent 8 hours in the pub he is hardly in any fit state to take care of a baby

Er, he sounds like a knobhead.

So you should be delighted to care for your daughter every second of the night and day and he begrudges holding her for a minute when he's been out all day and looking after her at night? He sounds like a dick.

Bloody hell, does he speak to you like that a lot?

Is he usually like this? Has he bonded with DD? Does he look after her at all?

You have my sympathies.It's the drink talking. You are definitely not being unreasonable. He is showing you he is an arse. I am glad his parents heard him and I hope they back you. Don't bother telling him he is unreasonable now as it is never worth arguing with a drunk. Discuss it in the morning. Tonight make sure you and the baby are safe.

If he is drunk I wouldn’t have him anywhere near her.

yanbu to expect him to help and he sounds horrible. I would be furious to be spoken to like that. However yabu to want a man who has been drinking all day to be responsible for your baby.

in these circumstances I imagine we would agree that DH gets tonight off but I get a rest tomorrow or something similar

but what he said to you would be hard to forgive.

If he's pissed and angry, I wouldn't be leaving the night feeds to him. I know you are knackered OP and it's a shit situation but I would get up to her myself during the night so I'd know she was getting her usual care.

Tomorrow morning however, I would be having a discussion with your DH regarding his unacceptable behaviour. What an absolute twat. Is this a regular occurrence for him shouting at you?

Firstly I wouldn’t really ask a “pissed” person in the first place. However drunk or not he sounds vile poor DD thank goodness she’s unable to understand what he’s saying . Id play hell with him if I was his mother !

What an idiot, kick him out and have him sleep in living room or spare room...and when his parents ask why, say he said he regrets having his daughter with you, which is another way of saying he wishes she wasn't here...what an awful man..drink makes the truth come out, I'd listen and take note of what he is saying

What a manchild.
I guess it's not the first time he's been drunk and abusive during your relationship?

Him shouting is wrong and vile.

You thinking it is a good idea for someone who is drunk to be in charge of DC is also wrong and you need to give your head a wobble.

Why are you trying to get a drunk person to look after your baby?

I'm sorry OP. This was a v similar Boxing Day to me in 2011 except DD has been up ill all night and I dared to complain to step mum that exP stayed in bed next morning even tho I had been up all night! She grassed me up hence passive aggression all Boxing Day: I was trapped as a non driver in a strange city but if you Dan escape pls do xxx

He is a total knobber OP and I only hope his parents back you up on this.

He is clearly steaming drunk, it happens (hopefully not often but it is that time of year) - don't let him within feet of your baby. And have the (perfectly reasonable) argument when he is sober. Hopefully he will be remorseful. If not, you should be rethinking your options (IMHO)

Unless his parents are equally awful then he has made himself look bad, not you.

The old saying springs to mind.

When someone shows you who they are, believe them the first time.

I'd find it hard to forgive behaviour like that, drink or no.

Sounds like a top class ass

I don't know, I am am picking up you have been drinking too?

I didn't even think he was drunk he seemed normal he's been a nightmare pulling covers of me shouting close to my ear.
Acting really weird never seen him like that now he's just randomly passed out I'm starting to wonder if he's had drugs.

@poppiesallykatie no I'm not drunk.

You are as off your tits as he so clearly is if you let him within a country mile of his baby daughter.

See what the morning brings but his behaviour is horrendous, and were I to hear one of my adult sons talk in such a way they would sober up pretty quickly once I had finished with them.