To think my children got so much

[Galwaygirl]

I am here looking at the amount of toys, gifts and Santa presents around the house. Don't children get so much, I actually have taken a black bag of toys away and no one has noticed, don't get me started on selection boxes, chocolate and crisps that were given!

Mine don’t, and we are well off (fortunately for us), just that we and family don’t go over the top.

It's my DS's first Christmas and he has been given so many toys! I can totally understand why children get so overwhelmed at Christmas, even I felt it and I'm a fully grown adult!
Can you do the thing where you rotate them and only keep a few out?
With the treats, can you ration them to certain days? Pile them up somewhere non accessible and they will have treat days sorted for a long time!

That's lovely. Mine don't get loads, they don't have lots of people who buy for them so it is manageable. I can see how it might get out of hand though. Grandparents give a bit of money, couple of toys from aunts and then it's whatever we get them.

My children got loads of toys too, many, many boxes of lego, new dolls, jigsaws....all sorts. They have a lot of people who buy for them though, around 15 I think, not including us.

Not all children. Mine only have me and 2 other family members who buy for them (small bits like selection boxes,
paper and pens)

DD was doing ok with a present each from family and friends and a few from DH and I, all stuff she wanted and was thrilled to recieve......then DM turned up with 3 black bags full of cheap plastic tat and dolls (DD doesn't like dolls, but DM does so buys them anyway) and DD got bored opening them, started complaining "oh look mummy, yet another one" and got more and more rude with every one she opened.

I was fuming at DM for spoiling her, she can't be arsed to visit her only grandchild all year then tries to make up for it with gifts all on one day to "prove" what a great grandparent she is

Previous years I have removed some presents straight to the charity shop still sealed in their boxes and DD didnt even notice, but she is old enough to know now (and young enough to let slip to granny) and I'm not so mean that I can take them away.

Anyone have any advice what to do with all this shite?

Mine received 10 presents each and a couple between them. Probably had about 200 pound each on them. Couple of books and small toys off family and friends too. My mum gave them vouchers we can use later in the year. I think that's too much but I know others who got a lot more.

I’m feeling particularly guilty and like there’s an embarrassing amount here. It’s not always been like this, never in fact. Maybe that’s why? It’s new?

Anyway, combatting it with having made sure we’ve donated toys and presents, also foodbank donations and san pro too. Nobody in RL knows that though.

Mine got 5 "bigger presents" and about 8 smaller ones. Nothing else. I don't buy in excess in any part of our lives and Christmas is no different.

@MissWilmottsGhost my advice would be to teach your daughter to be less rude herself. I'd never let my kids say that stuff - shocking

Your mum is a different matter entirely but what leapt out at me was how bratty your daughter sounds

My children got 4-5 presents max under the tree this year and it was the most enjoyable Christmas we have had! No one overwhelmed and they have actually played with everything they received. MissWilmottsGhost that stood out for me too - your DD sounds very rude.

Every year I say I will cut down but every year I don’t manage it. This year I think the present piles were smaller but I’m pretty sure I’ve spent almost the same, so I think it’s just because they’re getting older so the things they want are smaller yet more expensive.

Crisps? That strikes me as a particularly weird thing to give.

MissWilmottsGhost I'm not sure how old your DD is, but if she's past the age of about 3, perhaps you could start teaching her how much time, money and effort gift buying, wrapping and giving involves?

A friend made up a food hamper for them, Pringles, Doritos, Jellies, Chocolate, etc. That is where the crisps came from.

Has anyone got any advice for asking well meaning relatives to reduce the number of gifts they buy?

Last year it was ridiculous the amount of presents my parents got for my DD (only grandchild) - DD was so overwhelmed and there was so much not opened/played with even by the summer. I tried dropping hints and even said I think DD found it a bit overwhelming and they agreed said they’d just get a few gifts and some books, but... did the same this year.

I want to say it in a nice way as I know they mean well but the unplayed with toys are such a waste of money that they could use for other things and I felt so guilty taking bags of unwanted presents to the charity shop that my DD just hadn’t played with because she had so much.

Mine only got chocolate from their teacher and a friend plus their favourites from us.

I miss the days of huge piles of toys, once older the piles get smaller and more expensive. They had a few gifts from others but mainly money so will shop during the holidays for whatever they want.

We spent a lot on their gifts but I don't feel guilty. They are only children once. They each have their own charity they support and we donated to those.

It’s a nice problem to have, really, isn’t it? Lots of people who care for your child enough to buy them gifts; even if you think those gifts are too extravagant.

I wouldn’t say it’s new. Christmas in our house has always involved a lot of presents, and I’m 31. I’m also well adjusted, emotionally literate and no sort of demanding diva, so I wouldn’t worry that lots of presents at Christmas is setting your DC up to be future tyrants.

Yep. I usually put to one side things like duplicate gifts or items I'm not convinced they'll use and donate them to charity. Same goes for my gifts. I've given away a lot of body cream over the years. Do people actually use the whole set?

Put away all the stuff that needs time and attention eg craft stuff. Then introduce it on wet weekends when a distraction is needed and you have time to help. I would always say..oh heres the sand art Uncle Brian got you and maybe send him a picture of it all done.
Space it out over the year.
If your dc go to gps after school leave some there too. My gd leaves lots of craft stiff here as l enjoy doing it and her dm hasn't as much time. She turns up with various stuff to leave here and we work our way through it.
If there is duplicates give to charity shop or keep for birthday presents throughout the year.

Yep. Agree with pp who say DD was rude. It was totally unlike her and we were all shocked.

My point was it was really noticeable how she wasn't like that until she got bombarded by a 3 binbag shitload of plastic tat.

She handled it badly but then she is only 6.

Have some sympathy with misswilmot 's daughter. Having to pretend to be grateful for presents you don't want spoils the whole idea of getting presents. I received a big pile of stuff last year that is still in a box. It puts me off Christmas. Why does it have to be about consumerism, excessive consumption, greed, and destroying the planet? If children like the huge piles of presents that's fine, but if a child doesn't, they should not have to pretend they do. They should be able to say thanks but no thanks. At 6 a parent will obviously have to help them with their response.

Not sure if it helps but some of our relatives put money into the kids saving accounts. It started at their christenings so it made it less awkward if that makes sense.

We always limited presents a little. Ours also had to choose one stocking present to take to church where there’s a collection for the local prison visitor centre. I hate the idea of piles and piles of plastic tat and excess.

It was my DDs (3 months)1 first christmas and the amount she got was ridiculous (not us we didnt buy for her). It's all noisy plastic toys aswell. Already thinking that I need a plan for next year to keep it under control.