To think they should come earlier?

[BasinHaircut]

The ILs are coming round today and asked the other day what time to come. We said it please not before 12pm and dinner will be at 3.

They live an hour away but every single time they come they say ‘oh it was terrible traffic’ and they always arrive at least 90 mins after they say they were leaving. I think they just always leave late.

Apparently they are leaving at 1pm so won’t arrive before 2pm earliest, more likely 2:30.

AIBU to think this is a little late? We have a 5yo who they will want to do presents with when they arrive before dinner so they will literally arrive, presents, dinner. This will almost certainly them make dinner late by the time they come in, faff about and have a drink, do gifts.

They aren’t staying over and are unlikely to stay later than 9.

Well they're coming by 3 when dinner is. Presents can wait until afterwards.

We go to my parents for 1. Lunch is first. The boys (DN and DS) have managed to wait until after lunch for presents since birth - and survived!

We leave by 5/6pm though. 9pm would be too late for me. I'm half comatose by then 😂

Just start things when you want too, if they are late then they probably won't mind. Present opening can happen after lunch.
Have a lovely Christmas

Just start dinner at 3 anyway.

I was going to say "Isn't the 5yo old enough to be able to wait for presents till after dinner?", then realised it's the PILs who won't want to wait - well, they're definitely old enough to wait!

Saying they will arrive at 2pm when you've specified after 12 and dinner is at 3 is perfectly reasonable.

You are miffed because you are assuming they will be late (can still be 59 minutes late and still in time for dinner) and you are thinking presents will be rushed - but if dinner is nearly ready then you simply leave the presents for afterwards?

I'd serve up at 3 regardless of whether they are there or not.

My dhs entire family were like this.highlight dds 5th birthday
Food at 1, they arrived at 4. Lived 20 mins away.
Never forgave them, twats.

You can give children some presents early and other presents after dinner.

Don't stress about it, some people are naturally latecomers. Just don't get your dinner ready early. 3pm sounds fine but being as your in-laws are by nature latecomers, I might have said 2-2.30pm.

Not big deal though, you'll no doubt have a lovely time.

By way of an update, PIL arrived about 1:45 and almost floored me with thier punctuality.

In other news I got stranded with a flat tyre picking someone else up and dinner did in face end up being an hour late 😂

Was a nice day though so you are all right I just needed to unclench.

Merry Christmas!

Merry Christmas OP!

They should, and with a young child it's not a non-issue in the slightest. However, you know what they're like by now and they clearly don't intend to change, so the onus is on you to adopt the time honoured tradition of giving them an actual time to arrive that's earlier than the time you want them. Giving people like that a moveable arrival time is asking for trouble.

I did laugh at your update! "They will be late" and "I don't do late" ... universe "hold my mulled wine!"

They were probably aiming for 12 lmao.

Haha love the update!