To think it’s weird people wanting to cancel Christmas plans over colds and other little ailments?

[Newsername]

When I was younger I remember occasions when I (or one of my siblings) was ill with flu, diarrhoea or something else but gatherings in our house ALWAYS went ahead. I was just confined to my bedroom and food/medicine was brought to me. My parents would never ever cancel plans over minor ailments like this.

If we had to go somewhere and we were ill, one of my parents would go and take remaining siblings with them, or sometimes (my mums aunt would always do this) everyone would prepare food and bring it to ours and we’d have Christmas at our house.

Even now, if I’m not feeling up to it, I get picked up by family member and get given a blanket at their house and I sit and rest whilst they fuss over the kids, but enjoy time with my family.

I don’t understand why people are prepared to cancel plans over a cold or something else minor and not be willing to swap things around? Colds and winter bugs aren’t contagious if you follow appropriate basic hygiene and confine the ill person to a room.
The only exception is if someone in the family is immunocompromised, then keeping away is completely understandable.

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People with d&v need to keep the hell away from other people until 48 hours after last symptoms. The reason it’s everywhere are due to people not following this very simple rule.

So you feel like total shite, unable to eat anything, need to have emergency trips to the loo at no notice, have a pounding head, and all you want to do is lie on the sofa wrapped up in a throw & die. But because of the date you need to force yourself up, travel to someone else's house & feel even worse there.

I certainly wouldn't "enjoy time with my family" if I felt like death, and I wouldn't be terribly good company for other people in that state. All I would accomplish is potentially having a toilet accident on the way there, have to be looked after, the headache would get worse, I still wouldn't be able to eat, and make somebody else's loo stinky which I would then feel obliged to clean & deodorise. From the host's point of view, they would need to look after a sick person & plan everything around the body on the sofa.

I’ve had a virus for the past three days that’s totally floored me. I’ve regretfully cancelled two gatherings at my house. Partly so friends with toddlers don’t get ill just before Christmas and partly because there’s no way I’m up to house and food prep for guests.

I’m sad because seeing people in the run up to Christmas is what gets me in the festive mood, food is all ready to make yummy things for our guests and there’s a load of mulled wine that won’t be drunk (I’m pregnant). It feels a bit of a damp squib to suddenly be Christmas Eve!

I think people can use it as an excuse but I would be much more pissed off if someone turned up at my house with flu than if they cancelled last minute, I think that’s really selfish.

I guess it depends on how big a deal Christmas is to you. DH, our adult children and I just see it as another day. Aside from exchanging presents, it’s no different than any other family get together, of which we have many throughout the year.

If we only got together for a nice meal a couple of times a year then maybe it’d be worth the trouble, but they were just with us a week ago, we’ll be visiting them at New Years and then we’ll be in town again a week later etc....there’s no reason for any of us to suffer through Christmas if we feel like shit, or to risk making others feel the same. I’d never expect any of them to make the effort if they were sick, and they’d much rather rest in bed alone than have us all descend on them.

Such a load of drama queens on here, trying to control the spread of infectious disease that could cause serious illness to babies and elderly people. Honestly

It's not all cancelling at the first sniffle, it's polite to forwarn people there is illness so they can choose. The vast majority the time people still go ahead with whatever gathering is happening.

Rocking up with illness on the day just isn't cool. Let people know first.

@gamerwidow RA is horrid. I am suffering too. Hope you can still enjoy Christmas

I am on immune suppressants so a cold would be okay, but anything more serious, I would be cancelling or not going. I do think it is nice to let guests know if you are ill though so they can make their own choice

And NV isn't just a 'tummy bug' it has the ability of paralyzing an entire organ (your stomach) so your body has to violently act and is so contagious and difficult to kill. It has the ability to survive outside the body for quite a lengthy time. Nobody sane invites that into the house.

Depends how ill they feel. If they feel really bad and just want to curl up having a house full of guests is the last thing you'd want.

My mother has "cancelled christmas" on several occasions. She hasn't been ill, she just refused to get up. We carried on without her, but as a 5 year old I was so sad. By the time I got to early teens I realised she wasn't ill and was just horrible.

The awful thing is that I had D and V at her house last xmas and she kept coming into my room and shouting at me until I got up to 'deal with my DD', who was having a good time with DH. Happily DM got sickness too.

I am immunocompromised and so is dd, but yeah, apart from d&v (which will floor me for 3 weeks) I can't bothered to worry about other minor ailments.

DD will try to avoid colds if she has a peformance coming up (she's a singer).