To ask if anyone else has converted faith to get into a school?

[JumpingJunipersBatman]

OK. So I know people have but what does it actually entail?

I was raised rc but am atheist. We are looking at getting our agnostic 8 year converted (is that the right word?) to open up school choices but I'm not sure what that would mean in practice.

I'll make an appointment with a preist to discuss but what should I expect and for those who have done exactly this, what did you tell the preist when he asked about your reasons?

I know this may be seen by some as disrespectful or playing the system and it possibly is.

I'm sorry if people think I'm acting appallingly but I don't think doing what needs to be done to get my child a good education is appalling
What gets to me is that belief that if you do everything, including bending the rules, teaching dishonestly to your kids to get them in that amazing school, it makes you a examplary parent insuring the best future for your child, who'd be doomed to fail otherwise if going to the poor comprehensive school.

This is exactly what happened where I live and yes, parents planned to turn religious to get their kids to the amazing Catholic secondary school. Well they are now 19 and there is no link whatsoever between those going to top Uni studying STEMs subjects. My DD went to the local comp, one of her primary school went to the top one, my DD got three offers to study medicine, the girl got none despite getting better GCSEs.

I would never have pretended that we were Catholic to get my kids in one school. I am atheist but respect religions and I find it an utter insult to such religion to pretend to believe in their faith just to get a place in a school. Ironically DD did RE in GCSE in her non religious school and seem to have more respect for religions than many of the kids who came out of the Catholic school.

There is no glory in getting your kid in the best school if you do so by pretending. A hard working, dedicated and intelligent enough kid will do well whatever the school they go to.

Hmm, no-one has reminded to my post, yet.
In my area, there are only faith schools. We were allocated a.place at one +our second choice).
So, am I a disgusting, deceitful hypocrite for taking up the only school place offered. Am I doing him a grave diservice, teaching him to lie to get what he wants? Should I, as an atheist, be Home Educating him (despite not having the necessary skills?)

How does my child, with no choice, differ from the child of a lapsed Catholic who is going through the motions? Is my child more or less immoral than the child of a lapsed catholic, on account of the school system denying us a choice?

Gah, responded

She isn't bending the rules. She is wanting to follow the rules. As a lapsed Catholic, she isn't being dishonest. Being Catholic isn't like being an evangelical protestant. Just be honest with the priest, you're a lapsed Catholic, wanting to ensure your child gets a Catholic education, and how can you get involved in the church again?

Nothing rule bending or dishonest about it.

Basically, this thread is "I'm Catholic, and want my child to attend a Catholic school, aibu to discuss with the priest how to make that happen?" So , no, yanu.

Faith schools are a cancer to integration in this country. It's pure political know aid considering most religious families don't want them. After all, we've seen them work so well in Ni.
Still if we end up in that invidious position where my DSs have to pray they can sub Mummy for God.
And I'll have fun with any priest going toe to toe with me what with my powers of EMPIRICAL EVIDENCE!

Mine go to RC school because their Dad is RC. I think quite a few of the parents at his school have done exactly this and I don’t blame them. We live in a working class area in the catchment of a failing school with very poor outcomes. The majority of parents at DS school can’t afford to move to the catchment area of a good school. However we are in catchment to an outstanding RC secondary.

I think it’s very easy to condemn people like that from the ivory tower of people who have access to decent schools. But I think in their situation a lot of people who condemn would do the same. If they go to our local comp then they’re written off at 11. They churn out illiterates and there is a horrendous level of bullying and violence which just isn’t dealt with.

If someone chooses to get up and go to mass every Sunday, nobody can make a window in their souls to see if they are sincere or not. And it’s not really for me or any other Christian to judge.

I was baptised, grew up attending church weekly and attended a rc primary school but as I got older, I gradually stopped going. Married a man who was atheist (he now classes himself as pagan). We split when I was pregnant and I moved back to my hometown. Son was never baptised as my husband didn't want him to and I wasn't overly bothered. He luckily got a place which had been turned down at my old primary school (i went there, my mum worked there most of my life, nephews went there). Its a really good school and although he has grown up with a traditional religious education, when it came to making his first holy communion, we had to decide if we wanted him to. It would've meant regular church going and having him baptised. He has wide views on religion - opinions which are changing and also influenced by his dad and he decided he didn't want to make his FHC. He was 1 of about 2 or 3 who didn't and no fuss was made. Parents who had baptised children but didn't attend church regularly were annoyed and surprised that the priest expected them to attend weekly during the preparation. I know parents who have kids at church schools who have applied for their child's place because of the high standards of education, Ofsted etc then complain that religion dominates or it's too in your face. Similarly, my son now attends a Catholic high school - one of 2 in our area (we are right in the middle of two catchment areas). An excellent CofE near us is so highly subscribed they require proof you have attended church for a minimum of 2 years as part of their admission criteria. My son finds the RE side of school boring but doesn't query why he has to go, he enjoys school in general. I understand why people do it and I'm glad I was able to get him a place without too much hassle but I would not get him baptised to get that place. Unless you have no choice, dont pick a church school then moan about how often they are expected to go to church, celebrate feast days etc. I feel sorry for parents who have no choice but church schools when they are not religious. I feel the same way about people who insist they get married in church when they are not religious.

I'm not catholic but Dh's family is. Ds1 is at catholic secondary and I want Ds2 to get in, so I should really up my attendance to be honest!!

Quite Augusta we also live in a deprived area my son goes to the locsl RC school because its a good school compared to the other local crap schools im catholic and had both boys baptised catholic if you live in a nice middle class area with nice middle class schools its very different to schools in a deprived area .

I think it varies by school. Have you looked at the admissions criteria on the schools website. Some require baptism, one c of e decent school near us requires 60 registered attendance to church in the last 3 years with at least 20 in each of the preceeding 2 years. And it's the family not just the child or the parent. Basically you're giving up a day every other weekend for 3 years.

I can see why people do it. I feel like it's a bit disrespectful to people that truly believe, it's hard to explain why, I think it's the sneakiness of it and not being open about why you're attending...like you're joining them in prayer and all the while you're just laughing at them for believing

Our old neighbours did convert to Roman Catholic faith to get into a good primary school. It’s mainly mass every Sunday, some charity stuff, and getting baptised. Not too bad (we are paying for a private school instead - not sure which option is the “cheaper” one)

I know someone who has done it... for a secondary school in the next town. Firstly, I am all about everyone to their own. BUT don't go through an appeal if you don't get in. Don't complain about the extra costs or the religious education incl. visiting the church on a regular basis. And for God's sake do not look down on people who choose not to sent their children to to what you perceive a "good school".
Remember - school is only as good as the pupil that is attending the school.

State funding of religious schools is an abomination. Don't feel guilty about it if it is genuinely worth your time and effort. Looking at schools around me I'm having similar worries (though further into the future). The thought that I will have to choose between a crap school and faking belief in some faith is depressing. I don't understand how so many clear headed people seem to tolerate this status quo.

While I agree that the system is awful how do you imagine the conversation will go with your DD...”I know you don’t know if there is a god or not but I want you to lie and say you have faith. Keep the lie up with priests, friends, teachers and over a long period of time. Engage in various activities that require sincerity and commitment but do it all while lying.”

I almost did it. Had a terrible situation. Older daughter out of school through anxiety then got a place at a catholic school (I was brought up catholic but am a non-believer and didn't get kids baptised). She loved it. My younger daughter was at the catholic feeder school. All her friends got in to the same secondary school as my older daughter. But younger one didn't because of religion. I did one appeal because I had to drive older one there, but under CAMHS with anxiety, loads of reasons. For some reason appeal failed.

In the end they granted a second appeal and she got in, but for a moment I was thinking - 'sod this' these parents don't go to church - a lot of them anyway. And the only way I could see out of the situation was got get younger baptised. Luckily I didn't have to but I can see reasons to do so.

This school had no criteria higher than faith: siblings far down list on admission policy.

I think the system is rubbish. But the faith school is lovely and caring and calm and self selecting so....took advantage of that. I don't think it is worse than moving into a catchment.

I’m sorry if this had been said already, I’ve not read the whole thread.

I’m Catholic, my priest is welcoming to families even if he suspects they’re just after a school place, the reason being is that to get that school place the child has to become a pretty active member of the church with regular attendance etc. We view it that it can only be positive for a child to be exposed to the ideas of the church.

That being said, where my MIL lives a child has to be baptised by 6 months for the school to ‘count’ it during the applications process so clearly not all parishes take the same view as mine.

Assume you've checked the criteria op? Our local RC secondary school wanted proof of baptism before 6 months old, plus first holy communion in year 3 and church attendance every Sunday from the age of 5.

Have you seen all the posts on mums net of atheists complaining about religion being forced at their children at CofE /RC primary schools?
I would say this is not a good path to go down...

Don’t mind the negative posts OP, and feel free to moan about the ‘faith’ part of the teaching if you want. The school is there to give an education and in a faith school the faith but is really only a small bit of it that most kids come out ignoring anyway, despite what the believers would like to have you think.

AMI, it doesn;t have to be giving up a day though. As teenagers my girls got us to go to the 8am mass, arrive at the offertory, leave after the priest's communion if you really want to cut it short - 20 minutes (30 including driving) out of the week.