To despise shop bought cakes

[LadyRenoir]

First world problem alert- not to be treated (too) seriously :)

Ok, so I must admit that I don't mind shop bought cakes in general as such, although prefer to bake at home (especially easy stuff like cheesecakes, which you don't actually need to make most of the time). Just find it hard to find stuff that is actually tasty. I am no Master Baker myself, but I have a repertoire of really nice treats I can actually bake, and at home we never had shop bought stuff, Mum would always bake cakes and torts for birthdays.

PILs never bake anything. Not for the lack of skill, as they both cook well, but for every single occasion a cake or dessert is needed, they buy it. I have not tasted a nice pudding in their house ever- it's either some some of frozen strudle, or an affair involving a very dry sponge and tasteless jam. For bigger occasions, a few times a year they make a trip to Pat Val for a bigger cake.

I offered to bring something for Christmas, MIL politely declined that it is no needed, so we will have another dry thing with crumbling sugary coating. Yay.
I was about to bake one anyways as dont want to go empty handed (and I want to eat a nice dessert for Christmas).

If anyone knows of places selling decent cakes of sorts, maybe I can point MIL in that direction :)

@Bluelady I'm not going to upset MIL, I like her, just hate frozen strudels. And it's not like I can say no to a cake @FascinatingCarrot, as then she will be more upset I didn't want it (why? you not hungry? You want ice-cream instead?- which I don't).

@exLtEveDallas - They usually get cakes from the frozen shelf, not a proper bakery as such- although mind you bakeries near where I live make the most disgusting, artificially tasting cakes ever, we once got one for my partner's birthday and we thought we were eating plastic.

I just don't want to eat dry, disgusting cake that only tastes passable when you pour half a litre of custard over it. I love the opportunity spending time with the family and the meal, and didnt mention I dont appreciate having a meal at PILS, but not sure how it makes me ungrateful not to like dry sponge, if we could have something ever so slightly nicer instead.

I prefer home made but am grateful if someone else relieves me of the need to cook. It's what you eat most of the time that matters.

I can't stand supermarket shelf cakes 🤢
But have no problem with fresh cakes bought from a bakery.

I’m the opposite. I’ve yet to eat a homemade cake that is as tasty as a good bakery shop cake. Think people are usually too polite to criticise the efforts of those who have made a cake. Maybe your in-laws just don’t enjoy your baking.

But Costco frosting?

I'm not a cake lover but can't get worked up over shop-bought versus home-made. I am, however, an enormous pasta snob and in a blind taste-test can always tell home-made from shop bought.

I’m on of those weirdos that doesn’t like most homemade cakes. There are a few exceptions but it’s a risk and I hate not being able to finish something that someone has put time and effort into.

There are homemade puddings I like- just not cake.

And I bloody love a frozen strudel! Especially the ones with built in custard. Do those still exist?

I think everyone prefers home made, I know I do but it’s not always a option.

Make a cake for yourself for when you get home.

I think cakes generally are a bad idea.

I know two fantastic bakers- they are both morbidly obese.

Stiffing your face full of white flour, butter, sugar and encouraging others to do so is not something that sits happily with me.

@PigletWasPoohsFriend, wrong, they love the apple pie I bake, but MIL wants to be the master and commander of the feast, which comes with dry victoria sponge.

I can cremate wonderful cakes! :) one time I did bread rolls they were so bad that even though it was midwinter with heavy snow the birds didn't eat them ( though I am sure I saw one of them trying to kick a goal into the fence!)

Cake is overrated

Make moist cake. Bring half of it and say you had leftovers and didn't want to bin cake so you brought it with you and everyone is welcome to have a bit. Consume cake.

Why don't you take something, but say it is a new recipe you really wanted to try out and there's no such thing as too much dessert!

I prefer home made for some things and shop bought for others. My exMIL always baked home made - she really enjoyed them and genuinely thought about trying to sell them but I thought they weren't great (her staple was chocolate sponge filled with vanilla buttercream and raspberry jam, topped with chocolate flavour cake-covering and desiccated coconut ). Also at school carol concerts when parents brought in mince pies - most home made ones were grim. I love a good home made lemon drizzle or coffee & walnut though.

I’ve no time for baking and not interested but love the cakes from our local deli - they are one of my favourite treats. Sounds like you aren’t going to the right places to get your cakes .

@gottachangethename1- MIL does not enjoy being worse at something than me, and vice versa, so I understand the feeling. She was very upset when I made dish X for my partner, as she thought she was the only one in the family being able to make it for him (first born son, mommy's boy, and so on). We have had a bit of a rivalry since :)
Anyways, even if they dont like my bakes, I'm pretty sure they can't dislike them more than I dislike pastries past expiry date and dry doughnuts :)

I prefer home made so long as it’s made by someone who can actually cook/bake. Some shop bought desserts are fine. I like the fresh cream roulades etc ALDI etc do.

I am a very confident cook but cannot bake.

I've just made some mince pies. They are alright but nowhere near as tasty as the ones I bought from Sainsburys.

I also made a vanilla swiss roll with fresh cream. One again it's alright but not as nice as I could have bought.

So no I neither despise them nor refuse them!

@MrsStrowman @Celebelly
I actually DO have a recipe I want to try, so may bring a few slices for them to try. What's the worst that can happen, right?

Also, some people got very unpleasant- nowhere did I say I dislike PILS, just don;t understand their passion for dry, unpleasant cakes with no flavour.

A bad shop bought cake isn't very nice, but there's nothing as hard to swallow down as a bad homemade cake, especially if it comes from a kitchen of dubious hygiene. For that reason I'm quite happy to be fed shop bough at other peoples homes. You can always have a small slice.

I agree with Piglet. They prefer the shop bought cakes to what you make and are trying to be polite about it.

I’m sure the OP is on about bog standard supermarket cakes not something bought in from Betty’s of Harrogate or Hummingbird Bakery! I completely agree.

My son's birthday is on Boxing Day and we are on holiday til late Christmas Eve so we just won’t have time to bake him a cake so we’ve ordered one from a local cafe. She makes chocolate cake just like my granny used to make covered in Cadbury’s chocolate for £20 which will serve 8. Perfect.

I could have bought a vile chocolate tray bake from Morrison’s to serve 20 for about £5 but none of us would enjoy it so why not spend a bit more.

You'll get a hard time, it is AIBU after all. But YANBU, I totally agree with you.

I find almost all shop bought cakes and desserts taste horribly synthetic. Including Waitrose and M&S, in fact M&S have just much worse in recent years, they taste plastic now.

My MiL also favours frozen strudels, frozen cheesecakes which are really cloying and especially frozen roulades and pavlovas, especially chocolate ones which are especially grim. Cakes she prides herself on finding bargains in pound stores & that sort of thing.

Her main courses (especially her roast dinners) are fab! She just thinks desserts/cakes are not worth the effort.

Anyway, I tend to volunteer dessert or cake when I visit & she often accepts. If I don't want to make one, I just put up and shut up. In the summer there will be strawberries and cream which is nice, though unfortunately it is often elmlea rather than real cream.

If I do need to buy something sweet, I buy cakes from my local, independent bakers (their lemon drizzle loaf is good) or puddings from Cook which are excellent - on a par with homemade. Cook's Sticky Toffee Pudding is better than mine in fact. MiL won't shop in either though as too ££.

Sorry - but Colin the Caterpillar is proof that shop bought cakes can be amazing

I was about to bake one anyways as dont want to go empty handed (and I want to eat a nice dessert for Christmas).

Let's hope you aren't going to visit @quepoe with your offensive 'taking food with you Thread

To answer your question, yes, YABU to be so rude and critical about your host's hosting. Either suck it up or say 'no thanks' - you can just say you are saving your calories for the alcohol or the chocolates or whatever. I'm all for 'taking something with me' if going to stay, but it is the way you are looking down your nose at your MiLs hosting that doesn't show you in a great light.