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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Hopping cross about front seat car seat , exh, nw and day trip

47 replies

Magentaorwagenta · 21/12/2018 18:07

Ex h has newish gf ie it's on and off alot with whom he also has a newborn baby. Today, exh, new gf, their one month old baby, her 2 year old DC and my 4 yo DC went to a theme park about an hour's drive on motor ways away. When he dropped her back I realised she - my 4 yo dd- had been in the front seat the whole time with new girlfriend in the back with her two dds!!! I felt so upset that my DD had been put in the front, air bags still on. Aibu???

OP posts:
FFSFFSFFS · 21/12/2018 19:11

Well - he increased the risk of your daughter being seriously injured or killed if there was a car accident.

So yeah I think you should be pretty pissed off.

BottleOfJameson · 21/12/2018 19:13

Yeah I'd be annoyed if he didn't turn off the airbags. I did once take a short journey with a child in the front (I guess my car has airbags and I have no idea how to turn them off), so I might be a hypocritical but in my defence, her mum had to rush the younger sibling to hospital (she was fine in the end) and I had to take the child unexpectedly - in the panic I forgot and wouldn't have known how to switch it off either. For a long, planned journey on the motorway I would definitely have looked it up in advance.

Planesmistakenforstars · 21/12/2018 19:23

I have nothing to add, but I do like the fact that you've used "hopping cross" instead of "livid" or "fuming." It makes a nice change.

feelliketomhanks · 21/12/2018 19:25

Are you sure it wasn't an issue of not being able to fit the car seats all in the back?

Magentaorwagenta · 21/12/2018 19:33

Thanks all for replies. Yes hopping cross not fuming today 😂

I shouldn't have added the info about the on off girlfriend- it's true,no relevance to the story.

And yes I am upset cause dd could have been seriously injured and I wouldn't personally be comfortable sitting in the back knowing a small child was in the front with air bags on.

OP posts:
Magentaorwagenta · 21/12/2018 19:33

And yes absolutely sure. The car is a ford galaxy.

OP posts:
Magentaorwagenta · 21/12/2018 19:34

He clearly didn't prioritize turning off the air bags so yes I am pissed off

OP posts:
viviene · 21/12/2018 19:46

You would leave a newborn in the back with a 2yo and a 4yo instead?

Magentaorwagenta · 21/12/2018 19:48

Or not go to a theme park with a 4 week old baby and two preschoolers....

OP posts:
Nicknacky · 21/12/2018 19:50

For goodness sake, now you are saying they shouldn’t have went on a day trip?! Why shouldn’t they?

feelliketomhanks · 21/12/2018 19:51

I wouldn't put a newborn in the back with a 2 and 4 tbf. And I went on plenty of trips when my kids were young. They aren't like dogs. You can take them out before their vaccinations.

Louise856 · 21/12/2018 19:58

I think a 4 year old can sit next to a newborn in the car without hurting it, and I’m sure many do in families of 3 children! You have a mirror so you can see the baby and keep an eye on them! You are right to be annoyed OP and I agree they shouldn’t plan day trips out with all 3 kids if they are not capable of transporting them as safely as possible!

Magentaorwagenta · 21/12/2018 21:23

You are right to be annoyed OP and I agree they shouldn’t plan day trips out with all 3 kids if they are not capable of transporting them as safely as possible!

This!!

OP posts:
Lazypuppy · 21/12/2018 21:26

I thought if they were forward facing airbag is supposed to be on but just move seat as far back as possible?

I wouldn't put 3 young kids all in the back, if they start misbehaving it can be distracting. Makes more sense for one to be in front, but would have made moresense for baby in rear facing imo, then gf in back with the toddlers

Cupoftchaiagain · 21/12/2018 21:26

I thought the advice was to leave airbag on with forward facing child and push seat as far back as poss?

MaryShelley1818 · 21/12/2018 21:28

I agree with the last 2 posters. Forward facing car seat and airbags should be ON.
They should be only turned off for rear facing.

Fr3d · 21/12/2018 21:29

If your child is forward facing, I don't see the issue. Airbags only need to turned off for rear facing car seats

Nenic · 21/12/2018 21:29

If it’s forward facing seat, the air bag should be on but seat pushed back.

Snowydaysaregreat · 21/12/2018 21:32

Forward facing.airbag ON. Even dsd chilbminder puts her in the front due to lack of space in back. Perfectly legal

Cherries101 · 21/12/2018 21:39

The airbags were on, so that was dangerous. If they had been in even a minor crash your dd would have died while his gf’s kids would have walked away. Make that clear to him.

Lazypuppy · 21/12/2018 21:42

@Cherries101

The airbags were on, so that was dangerous. If they had been in even a minor crash your dd would have died

That is so wrong! Airbag SHOULD be on for forward facing as pp have said above! Chair should be pushed right back, so that's what Op should be checking with ex

Nicknacky · 21/12/2018 22:30

No one can possibly say the op’s kids would have died and the babies would have survived a hypothetical collision ffs.

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