The way my mum makes me feel

[Notrusthere]

My whole life it has been obvious that my older brother is my mum's favourite child. It's something I accepted at a very young age and we as a family usually make a joke of it.

My mum is disappointed in me. I'm overweight and don't have a good job. I also have mental health issues which she doesn't get, but tries in her own way to be supportive.

I don't know of its because it's coming up to Christmas but today it's really gotten to me.

These are the examples of what she's said today but it's just a snap shot.

1. She told me to stop sitting with my.legs up on the sofa, said I was bending my spine

1. I showed her pictures of the parents of the puppy we are on a waiting lost for. She said the mum looked gormless (both dogs are stunning)

1. She said she'd had a brilliant idea for my brothers Christmas present, and that was the present she was most excited about this year.

1. She asked where I wanted to go for Christmas eve walk (tradition) and when I gave my opinion she said it was a rubbish idea.

I realise this all seems very petty but small things like this add up and it's been going on 30 years!

I've told her before how it makes me feel and she says I'm being oversensitive.

I don't know how to deal with this and I'm worried I'm going to end up in tears over Christmas

I can relate, my younger brother is pretty hopeless so my mum has supported him most of his life, bought him a car, gave him endless money, drops food round for him every week etc. She says I’m sensible so she doesn’t have to worry about me. If me and my brother are in the same room I’m pretty much invisible to her. She has always preferred him but it’s just something I’ve learnt to accept. We’re all guilty of picking favourites. I have a better relationship with my dad and always felt closer to him but that’s not to say I don’t love my mum.

You could concentrate on yourself if your not happy? Sign up for the gym, maybe start looking into switching jobs? Concentrate on the more positive people in your life like other family/friends? Spend more time with them and less with your mum. That’s what I would do x