I don’t want to give too much info as this may be outing. I hope you can follow it.
A few years ago a close family member behaved disgustingly to myself and my sibling. This destroyed the relationship between me and the family member but my sibling (who has form for being a complete pushover) still kept contact and allowed the family member to alternately treat them badly then allow them to buy them large gifts to assuage the guilt they were feeling I expect.
Other members of the family have tried to stick up for my sibling and themselves been ‘cut out’ by family member yet my sibling is STILL in contact with them, relying on the person to help them with household repairs and going to them for advice etc.
I’ve tried explaining to sibling that all the time they remain in contact and have a relationship with this person it’s sending the message that it’s ok to allow them to treat him like this. It’s like my sibling won’t cut ties and stand on their own feet. Sibling will come to me for help and advice but also family member who, after the way they’ve treated us they shouldn’t be in any of our lives.
I feel so angry and betrayed, I’m losing respect for my sibling who needs to also stand firm and show this person that it’s not ok to treat people badly. Sibling agrees with everything I say then is back in contact with family member straight away. I don’t want to cut sibling out of my life but I hate the fact I know they are in contact. AIBU?