Ok, will try and keep this brief. Haven't posted on here for ages but am so frustrated that I need some perspective!
Sunday morning, DH wanted sex, I didn't. I was happily reading my book, DCs were downstairs but inevitably come up as soon as we get to it, and are getting suspicious about locked doors. I said this, he got in a huff, went downstairs complaining that I was treating him like another chore etc. It is true that he wants sex more than I do generally.
Bit later, I followed him down, tried to make up with him. Can't remember exact conversation, but I ended up saying "surely I don't have to always agree to it". He flew off the handle, effing this and that, telling me I was accusing him of being a rapist, which obvs I wasn't. I told him he was being ridiculous, which definitely didn't help. He does get very sweary when we argue badly, tells me to eff off and that he can't speak to me. It's true that there's no point trying to talk to him in that mood, but I hate not being able to talk things through.
Now three days on and he's still barely speaking to me except when kids are around. I got really upset last night and was crying - he was working and I was in another room, but he came in and said it wasn't helping that I was getting upset. He doesn't want to talk, be affectionate at all, just wants to be left alone.
I understand that he was hurt and that he probably feels rejected, but I'm also hurt by the way he spoke to me. I've also been making a big effort to be nice to him, and not getting much back in return.
Whenever we argue he makes me feel that I'm being totally unreasonable, and just shuts down and refuses to talk. Most of the time we do get on really well, but I find his extreme reaction in arguments really hard to deal with - his family all talk to each other like that, but mine don't and I don't think it's right.
Rant over!