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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To think this is an absurd party request?

151 replies

MerryMax · 18/12/2018 09:18

DD is invited to a 7th birthday party today. The birthday girl's mum has given clear instruction that all parents need to stay and be present on the climbing frame. I've had a cold and don't feel like traipsing around a climbing frame trying to follow a bunch of 7 year olds. Surely at 7 they can be in there on their own?

OP posts:
SnuggyBuggy · 19/12/2018 11:22

You aren't a twat. It was still a ridiculous request. She didn't have to do a soft play if the climbing frame made her anxious.

BackforGood · 19/12/2018 11:45

What SnuggyBuggy said.

Wooooooooaaaaaaaahhhhhhh · 19/12/2018 13:08

You’re not a twat, you weren’t to know. Hope all the children had a great time.

Thentherewascake · 19/12/2018 14:04

Here you go.

May it be a lesson to some of the posters who judged without knowing anything and were ready to attend the party exclusively to spite the host. (as opposed to the posters who thought that was weird but were not spiteful).

let's hope you remember that next time you are ready to attack other parents.

StroppyWoman · 19/12/2018 14:20

Ah bless her, she must have so many anxieties and fears we can't imagine. I'm glad the children could have a good time (and I admit I'm giggling at the idea of a bunch of parents strewn across a climbing frame like delinquent teens)

Molakai · 19/12/2018 14:38

Thanks for the very honest update!
I hope some pps read and take note. There's so much about other people we may not know and too often people are quick to pass judgement.

Good on you OP . Your acknowkedgement demonstrates you are not a twat. Flowers

Pashal2 · 19/12/2018 18:01

Does she actually mean you must be behind the child with your arms outstretched and hands cupped behind their backsides in case their child slips and falls? Or does she mean to keep an eye on your own kid as if you were having a pool party? Is this woman afraid of a lawsuit of some kind if a child is injured on her property?

Ated · 19/12/2018 18:21

Who is responsible for the party and who owns the equipment. If it is you then check your insurance as 7-year-olds can be boisterous and get hurt.

WaxOnFeckOff · 19/12/2018 18:29

That's bonkers, most parents would ask a few of the parents they know best if they wouldn't mind hanging about to help or if they didn't really know any, maybe ask if anyone was intending staying and could they help you out in exchange for a cup of tea. Not on the play frame though, just to help keep an eye on everyone.

manicmij · 19/12/2018 18:31

At 7 years old and in a softplay area each child doesn't need to be escorted on a climbing frame. Has the parent perhaps had a nasty experience with her own child/ren and wants parents to be able to deal with such an incident. The staff will just love having all the adults inside the area and the children will be absolutely livid not being able to play and do their own thing.

Wheresthebeach · 19/12/2018 18:41

Ah OP - you're not a twat. Live and learn.

3out · 19/12/2018 18:49

Not a twat. Poor lady. It’s rather an unusual thing to be worried about, even with their history. I wonder if someone has commented in passing about how their DC got hurt there once/near miss and it’s frightened her.
Also, it’s hard enough to get 7 year olds to listen to you at the best of times. If English isn’t your first language then I’m guessing it’s rather more of a daunting prospect.

underneaththeash · 19/12/2018 18:58

Not a twat at all.

I still wouldn't have gone on the frame, I have a 7yo, but my shoulder's too buggered to climb into a soft play and I know she's well behaved and a little risk averse too. I would have been surprised at being asked to stay though, but I would have done if the parent insisted.

Raindancer411 · 19/12/2018 19:04

Where I hold my son’s party is a soft play and they request parents to watch their kids

acegod · 19/12/2018 19:09

Don't go if you can't honur the invite stay home and lazy around. Simple. When will you learn to respect other people's wishes if your invited to their party their rules. Don't like don't go. How hard is that???

Cachailleacha · 19/12/2018 19:14

I would expect a party like that to be drop and run at 7. I would stay as requested and supervise the same as I usually would if taking my child to soft play, within the rules of the centre. So if that is sitting with a coffee, then that is what I would do.

She has the right to say she doesn't want to be responsible for other people's children, but not dictate what other parents do as they are present and supervising as required by the centre.

suzy2b · 19/12/2018 20:16

I don't follow my 3yr granddaughter around she just goes off on her own

QuackPorridgeBacon · 19/12/2018 23:20

I shall dutifully crouch in the play frame until told otherwise because I'm not rude but I just had to get it off my chest before I jam my knees into it for a few hours!

Don’t be so bloody stupid. Grow up a bit.. did she actually say all parents had to be in the space at once? How fucking small is it that you will jam your knees?

QuackPorridgeBacon · 19/12/2018 23:22

Posted before I read the ops last post. Still not understanding everyone being in the frame though?

OlennasWimple · 19/12/2018 23:23

Isn't this just her way of saying that it isn't a drop and run party? Confused

OlennasWimple · 19/12/2018 23:25

Oh sorry, OP, I missed your update there Blush

You're not a twat, simple misunderstanding. Hope everyone had a great time

Original poster
MerryMax · 19/12/2018 23:33

@QuackPorridgeBacon You are what's wrong with Mumsnet. Your unpleasantness is uncalled for. Calling people stupid and telling them to grow up? Nice. Do you feel big? Important? You couldn't even be arsed to read the whole thread before spewing out your bullshit. I don't give a hot damn but it does put people off posting and that sucks. Don't be what sucks.

OP posts:
QuackPorridgeBacon · 19/12/2018 23:36

Okay. I think you need to calm down a bit. Only a stupid person would cram themselves inside somewhere, making themselves uncomfortable because some people on mumsnet, said what? Because as far as I can see people couldn’t believe that someone would suggest something like that. So yeah, I used the word stupid. And I’m what’s wrong with mumsnet? Okay, fine. No need for the dramatics though.

ABoozedMoose · 19/12/2018 23:38

Not a twat, but maybe you & some of the other mums could arrange a play date or even just have the other mum over for a relaxed cuppa. If she's anxious and lived in fear then I hope you will all make her feel welcome and reassured

onegiftedgal · 20/12/2018 08:34

I never understand why parents are obliged or asked to stay at parties. The invite is for the child and the organiser should be responsible for the children. If she can't cope then she shouldn't invite so many or she should organise her own help.
Preston school children maybe, but 7 years? She seriously needs to get a grip or have her DC party in her own home or something.
A party invite is my 2 hour window to get stuff done!

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