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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

AIBU to leave my engine running for ten mins at 6.45 each morning (M-F)?

801 replies

ThreeJumpersIsNotEnough · 16/12/2018 17:21

Neighbours have just come to the door with a Christmas card and a polite request to be more quiet in the mornings.

I usually leave at 7am to drop dd at breakfast club and get myself to work at 8am (I work Mon-Fri only - no weekends).

Now it's getting colder, the car is unbearably cold in the mornings so last week I started nipping out 10-15 mins earlier while dd was brushing her teeth so the car would be warm for us getting in and the frost/ice would be mostly melted from the window.

Neighbours have revealed that they are normally woken by me leaving most mornings at 7am but they can put up with it as I leave immediately so they are able to go back to sleep. However, they are not willing to put up with what I've been doing recently as they have found it impossible to go back to sleep having been awake for so long waiting for me to leave with the engine running ... Hmm

They have suggested I park further away from the house.

This is my first winter with these neighbours. They only moved in beginning of the year and we're polite to each other but not any more than 'hello' acquaintances. We live very rurally - just our two houses - in woodland area. Any noise carries and it is mostly silent (why I moved here - now I'm the one being a noise pest, it would appear). No street lights. 5 minute drive down our landlord's private (god awful road) onto the public road where there are other houses.

If I parked further away, that is further for me and DD to walk to the car each morning - in the pitch black - with our bags. Likewise, it is further for us to walk to the house each evening when we get back.

Not sure what the solution is. I told them I wasn't keen to park farther away (due to the above concerns) but they've asked me to give it a try at least for tomorrow. I've agreed to try it.

AIBU to ask for your ideas on what a peaceful resolution to this would be?

OP posts:
lauramaywharton · 17/12/2018 18:50

Try scrapping the ice off the car for 10 mins they soon will see there's only two ways the ice is coming off either engine on and scraping for ten mins which is noisy as hell or just engine for 15. You shouldn't have to park away from your house because they don't like you defrosting your car. They new you had a car and kids when they moved in what did they expect. Its like these people in houses moaning about kids screaming out the back of there house when they back on to a park or school lol 😂 if they want peace go even more rural where your the only house for miles

celticprincess · 17/12/2018 18:52

Well the bin lorries wake me once a week coming down my street just after 7am running their engine and banging the bins about!!
The neighbours standing in their back yards smoking also wake me up at all hours, laughing and giggling, even a conversation at a reasonable volume seems to carry down a narrow terraced street.

One neighbour is picked up by a taxi around 7am many mornings too so that’s usually hear running.
People arriving back from the pub al all hours during the night by taxi and taking ages to crawl out and say goodbye to the people left in the taxi.
I also have to run my car about 5-10 minutes until the inside dentists. I’m usually spraying the outside whilst I do this. Using cloths on the inside makes the windows all streaky and difficult to see out of.
I lived next to a bus station many years ago and eventually became immune to the beeping noise the buses make when they reverse out. These started pretty early most days - from about 6am onwards. Was glad to move from that flat.

JustABetterPlayer · 17/12/2018 18:54

I have a not particularly practical Mustang and my neighbour (who is lovely) did come round and politely mention that when the engine is cold the vibrations make her house vibrate... oops Blush

It takes 10 seconds to use water to help defrost, and away I go 😄

widgie · 17/12/2018 18:54

Glad your not my neighbour it’s a selfish entitled generation who only think of themselves

DioVelazquez · 17/12/2018 18:54

A car idling really isn't that loud.

But then I also think leaving a car running just so you don't get a bit cold for a few minutes is ridiculous too.

#bunchofsnowflakes etc.etc.

tonglong · 17/12/2018 18:56

All those complaining about noise from a car starting should try having children to experience noise that doesn't fit in with there schedule

VernYu · 17/12/2018 18:57

I run a little electric fan heater on an extension into the car. No risk of car getting stolen, and nicely warmed and defrosted.

widgie · 17/12/2018 18:58

give me your number and I’ll wake you up at six forty five every morning or earlier if your already up

JacquesHammer · 17/12/2018 18:58

All those complaining about noise from a car starting should try having children to experience noise that doesn't fit in with there schedule

I have. She’s never disrupted my sleep like the blinged out car the lad has next door. Fortunately neighbours were mortified when they realised how much he was disturbing everyone else and dealt with the issue.

MummyAng · 17/12/2018 19:00

Wow, yes you ABU, are you really unbearably cold? Really? Get a blanket and stick it on the radiator, I always put my kids coats on the radiators before we walk to school.. my neighbours slam their car doors at 6:00 which pisses me off but this is just incredibly selfish, I honestly can’t believe you’ve even asked the question!

Vanna73 · 17/12/2018 19:03

The pollution stats are insane when cars are idling. WE are heading towards climate chaos and you're worried about being cold for a few minutes!? Use a scraper! It's not even been that cold...

R3b3kah · 17/12/2018 19:04

Wow I didn’t think to try a cloth Hmm

If it was that easy would I sit there for the pure hell of it?
I’ve tried cloths and it just smudges all over the windows still making it difficult to see, so still not a solution

MeOldChina · 17/12/2018 19:04

It's not that the car idling isloud, it's just that it's a constant disruptive rumble. Your brain doesn't respond to all noises but something like that will raise your awareness enough to wake you up and keep you awake. Add in the irritation if this is happening regularly and it would become a problem.

Onecutefox · 17/12/2018 19:05

Start your morning with scraping off the ice from your car windscreen. Grin

tonglong · 17/12/2018 19:09

What if the ice scraping noise is also annoying?

Perhaps survey neighbours to find out what time your allowed out, for how long and if your allowed to scrape the screen or run the heater

purityjonesrockedmyworld · 17/12/2018 19:09

Terrible for the environment and bad for your engine so YABVU

Onecutefox · 17/12/2018 19:11

Before 7am is a bit selfish but after 7am is fine. This morning I couldn't find the ice scrapers and had to run the engine (after 8am) for more than 5min. Wasn't happy about it as it's wasting the fuel and the fumes, eewww - you could see and smell them. The kettle wouldn't work for me as the car isn't parked next to the house.

SarfE4sticated · 17/12/2018 19:18

If it's that quiet where you live OP, you would have to park quite a way from your house for them not to be able to hear your engine.

mylifestory · 17/12/2018 19:21

Cars are exceptionally freezing in mid-winter like we have had recently. I leave my car running the same as you to warm it up. It is on my drive though. And we are in the middle of London. Its very quiet and i can barely hear it myself never mind anyone else. I'm pretty sure hardly anyone who has commented here has to get in their car in the morning ..... Xmas Smile

DioVelazquez · 17/12/2018 19:24

I'm pretty sure hardly anyone who has commented here has to get in their car in the morning

I used to leave at 6.30 a.m. year round, in an old banger.

I'm not one to whine over a bit of cold weather.

sunshine11 · 17/12/2018 19:29

You should come and live next to me OP. We leave for school at 7.45am. For the last week or so I have started the car and left the engine running for 5-10 minutes before we leave home so that it gives the car a chance to warm up and the heated seats/steering wheel to get warm.

The kids have blankets to wrap them up too but some mornings it is just so cold. I am sure my neighbours would rather my kids are warm and not at risk of illness through the cold and damp. After all, they are retired and can stay snug and warm at home all day whilst we must venture out.

SarfE4sticated · 17/12/2018 19:29

We have quite a pollution problem in London mylifestory I'm a little concerned that you might be contributing to it...

Tiffinity13 · 17/12/2018 19:30

I'd be pretty fed up if you did that outside my house every morning too tbh.

ggirl · 17/12/2018 19:32

I live life on the edge and use warm water to de-ice. I have done this for about 30 years and have never experienced a cracked screen.

Andromeida59 · 17/12/2018 19:34

We have a neighbour that does this. People that run their cars either early in the morning or late at night are just dicks. YABU.