AIBU to just feel bluerghhh about no one offering to come today

[Alwaysbekind2014]

My DD is due in to hospital today for a procedure ( albeit in the grand scheme of her life not major )
This will be her 28th time under general anesthetic so not something we are new to but to me every time feels the same now.
Her dad hasn’t messaged mine you I’m not sure why that suprise me and I know absolutely no will message ( my mum and sister etc ) to see if she is ok this evening.
They do love her but I feel because she has a serious chronic condition people just think it’s our normal. I have sooken to this about it but nothing seems to change.
My mum does visit if we are in ( she works in the hospital haha )
sisyer very local and tbh most of the time barely messages to see if she is ok.
( she will visit maybe once a fortnight in hospital )
But is great when she is home and doing well.
My friends no longer visit when we are in.
There is no more offers of do you need anything bought up or a hot meal !
( we were in hospital for 20 months straight ) and mutiple admissions since.
I just feel like it’s become so normal to everyone but me.

I hope it all goes well for your daughter OP

People can be very thoughtless at times, I'm sorry.

Where are you op?

If you are near me (north-west) I might be able to nip in with a few bits for you?

I'm so sorry you're going through this, but yes a lot of people do seem to see being hospitalised with a chronic condition as just that person's normal. It never is though is it?

When I was a child I was very close to my cousin who is around my age, he probably spent more time in hospital than out of it and the constant worry is exhausting. The offers of help come in thick and fast to start with but then people get tired of helping and it all tails off just as you're getting to the end of your tether when you need the help the most.

I hope your daughter is alright tonight and that the operation is a success and she's not in too much pain etc.

Best of luck op

I’m sorry for both how abandoned you feel and your DD’s 28 operations, poor little love🌷

Please try not to take it personally. Humans are very good at ‘normalising’ situations & once something becomes ‘the norm’, not ‘seeing’ it.

It’s hard to ‘ask for what you need’ when actually, what you need is for people to SHOW they care.

It’s lonely and isolating and immrealky sorry you’re going through this alone.

(I’m pretty disgusted by your Mum and sister though, they at least should be more caring about you both. No words for her father. We’ll, even a few, but none that will help. I do have space under my patio though!).

What’s time is she due back from theatre and are you expecting to take her home today?

That is difficult, I think you're right everyone just assumes it's your normal and you're coping fine. I would keep mentioning to friends and family that it's difficult when DD is in hospital and you never get used to it. X

Hope it all goes well op!

How’s it going op? X