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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To give up masters

26 replies

WishfulSprouts · 12/12/2018 11:32

I’ve only got another 9 months of it but I’m seriously just so fed up I could cry.
Taken 2 days holiday to try and and get these assignments done both due early jan spend hour and hours this morning reading to write a very small section (300 words) and still not bloody done it.
I’m so fed up of constantly feeling stressed about getting the work in, not having time to study, feeling guilty when I am studying instead of spending time with the kids.
It’s just one massive headache 🤕

OP posts:
Duckherding · 12/12/2018 11:33

You can do it. It's the reading that takes time. Keep chipping away and good luck

Duckherding · 12/12/2018 11:34

Oh and don't feel guilty your education will benefit them as well !

BuffaloCauliflower · 12/12/2018 11:37

I feel your pain OP. I’m p/t masters whilst full time work and it’s so hard. But you can do it and it will be worth it, hang in there. Try and find small blocks in the day to get reading down so it’s not all at once. Have you got a partner who can take the kids out for a weekend day to let you focus?

Swipetounlock · 12/12/2018 11:49

Sounds like you are being too conscientious. Skim read ruthlessly. Literally flick through books. I even look on Amazon and read a few well written reviews rather than read a whole book. Find a study partner and split the reading. Find out who is marking the essay and what are their pet theories. Don't laboriously take notes from a book into a word document or onto paper, and then transfer them in your essays - note straight into the essay on your computer, then tidy it up later. Use coloured text in your essays to denote different levels of having edited the text (red for rough notes, orange for edited, green for final). Get a recommendation for a referencing software to do your bibliography (sorry I did mine too long ago to advise).

Original poster
WishfulSprouts · 12/12/2018 11:54

I think maybe I am-the more reading I’ve done this morning the confused I feel now! I just want to get on screen it shouldn’t this hard 😧
My confidence is knocked by last two marks 48% and 50% before that I was getting merit marks as seemed to know what the hell I was doing.

OP posts:
Katiecausesmischief · 12/12/2018 12:01

I’ve been there -am still there but doing my PhD now (why oh why I sometimes ask myself!)
Follow the advice you have been given above - it is all helpful.

If (like me) it’s been a long time since you did any studying it can be a real shock to the system but you will get through it and you can do it.

The other thing to remember is no one ever asked when grade you got for your masters you just got one. It doesn’t matter if you get a pass or a distinction unless you are planning on doing a PhD.

Reading efficiently & effectively is a skill - see if the university has any study skills courses you can do. I know mine do.

Good luck - you can do it Flowers

Swipetounlock · 12/12/2018 12:01

It's very easy to get bogged down. I quit a PhD for the same reason, but at Masters level, it should be doable. You need to be very ruthless. Don't worry about your grades unless you are wanting to stay in academia or do teaching afterwards. You need to pass. I also meant to say, pay attention to the date of what you are reading. The more recent, the more likely the author will have read the previous stuff, so you don't need to read it in such detail.

FairytaleOfWigan · 12/12/2018 12:02

Great advice from swipe to unlock

SpoonBlender · 12/12/2018 12:10

Check with your supervisor on why your marks are down, that's a significant drop and you're probably missing something significant. Perhaps that'll be the key to getting you through the current hurdle.

Original poster
WishfulSprouts · 12/12/2018 12:13

Thank you all you are very encouraging.
Marks down he felt first lower mark was that particular module most people saw a dip in mark just a tough one and the latest due to being too general and not nuanced enough.
I’ve got 2 hours and 30 mins before school run if I can get this bloody section done maybe I will feel like it can be done!

OP posts:
Mummyshark2018 · 12/12/2018 12:22

I feel your pain op. I did a masters whilst working full time and it was hard. I've recently finished a phd. My motto was 'it just needs to be good enough' (to pass). Do you have a plan for your essays? I always found putting headings and subheadings in place helped me focus. I'm also the type of person that just chips away at it as I didn't have full days to commit to writing, so I did and hour here and there. Made it feel more manageable. Good luck

fuelledbystilton · 12/12/2018 12:28

me too, part time phd and full time++ job. Knackered, late on a paper, not doing a very good job and wanting to pack it in.

deadlines, strategies and skim reading are the way forward plus "that'll do!"

have you got classmates in the same boat for moral support?

sallysummer · 12/12/2018 12:31

I am seriously considering the same, I'm doing a combined Masters and teacher training and it's hell on earth.

SoftlyCatchyMonkey1 · 12/12/2018 12:33

Keep going OP
The next 9 months will pass whether you complete your masters or not so you may as well complete it

Original poster
WishfulSprouts · 12/12/2018 13:32

Sadly it’s an online course so no one else to speak to from the course. My friends are supporting in the sense of ‘you’ve not got long left now’.
I really wish I hadn’t started now feels like black cloud over me I wish I could get this done and finished with.

OP posts:
fuelledbystilton · 12/12/2018 14:11

that's a shame. I completely know that feeling. I've got 2.5 years to go Sad and I can't wait. I think the thing is to break it up into smaller chunks, assignment by assignment and see them as percentages off a list perhaps (I do this).

Alternatively PM me if you want a whinge - there's 2 other women I know doing the same thing as me and it's vvv helpful to know that they're behind with their assignments and don't understand stats either! sometimes knowing that it's not just you is helpful.

fuelledbystilton · 12/12/2018 14:12

oh and it's easy to say it's only 9 months but that's a long time if you hate something!

ItsalmostSummer · 12/12/2018 14:14

Keep going. One of my biggest regrets is not finishing mine. Keep going. You will get there.

Prefer · 12/12/2018 14:34

Keep going OP! I was in your shoes two years ago. I had a baby and was pregnant with another one and was so exhausted and dying to pack it in but I kept plodding along getting assignments done and surviving on very little sleep.

When it came to a month before my dissertation was due my mother took my DD to stay in her house for 10 days and I went day and night and got a huge amount of it done which gave me the motivation to keep going. Yes I felt bad about shipping her off but I knew it was worth it in the long run and now I’m so glad I did. Plus seeing you do this will inspire your children to work hard so no need to feel guilt.

Graduation was one of the proudest moments of my life! Yes it’s a shit show at the moment but it’s only a few short months and it’ll all be over. Take little steps every day and I would highly recommend having someone lined up to watch your DC for a week or two towards the end. You won’t regret doing it - keep going, you got this 💪🏼

Original poster
WishfulSprouts · 12/12/2018 19:36

Thank you all today was a bit of a write off I did put effort but seem to get absolutely no where. Tomorrow I need to get started on the other assignment so hopefully I’ll feel more able with that one 🤞
I just need to some words down to give me breathing space.

OP posts:
JesusHChristOnABike · 12/12/2018 19:41

Sounds like me exactly 9 months before I finished my MSc. I even had an email typed up in draft to my supervisor withdrawing from the course.
Persevered in the end, got a pass with merit & now driving myself crazy trying to write s phd proposal.

Just remember if you give up now, you will always regret it!

Toomuchworking · 12/12/2018 19:53

Oh god I remember this! It's like when people say about newborns, "it will all be easier in 3 months." and you want to grab them by the ears and shout, "BUT I'M NOT GOING TO LIVE THAT LONG AT THIS RATE!"
9 months seems like forever but it will all be done so soon, don't give up now - you'll feel shit about it in a couple of years. Make the level of current stress worth something. Crack on with it, you can do it!!!

90mammasophie · 12/12/2018 20:35

Keep going! Don't give up. It's only 9 months and could put you in a better situation for life Smile
You can do it!

Original poster
WishfulSprouts · 13/12/2018 12:07

Thank you all going bit better today 300 words done for my other assignment and tutorial later with my lecturer so I can see where I’m heading with this one.

OP posts:
londonmummy1966 · 13/12/2018 15:26

Keep going - you can do it - I've got 9 months to go too so PM me if you want support.
I can recommend Zotero (which is free) for help with references etc. Just cut and paste the ISBN number of a book or the citation reference for an article into the bibliography for that assignment and it is then really easy to pop in the references etc. It also generates a bibilography for you.