Spending Christmas alone...

[harriet33]

Anyone else?
I'm 32
Feeling a bit blue when I think of Christmas this year.

Yep me too

Me, my sons at his dads. I’m writing a list of nice things that I enjoy doing and devote the day to that....

I appreciate it’s different when it’s by choice, but I have chosen to be aloneness this year. My dad died earlier in the year and I’m breaking away from the big family Christmas that I haven’t enjoyed for a while. I’ll probably do something different next year.
I’m going to have nice food and drink in my pjs and watch tv/read. It’s like a lot of holiday days as a single person.

I'm thrilled to bits to be spending xmas alone, I chose it this year as I'm exhausted after a year of self employment with no holidays and don't feel like trawling about the countryside.
2 weeks off in PJs doing what I want - absolute heaven. I'm not even putting any decorations up.

Social media is quite depressing on Christmas Day.
You see all these huge families and all the fun they have.

I know it might not sound great, but why don't you volunteer somewhere? Lots of places are looking for staff on xmas day. I never thought I'd be into the whole thing but have been doing a lunch club once a week for the elderly, it's so awarding and it makes their day. Think about it, it will make christmas special x

harriet i know.. but i have come to realise there are no families without issues. The advertising and the tinsel in Tesco in September just serves to remind me that DS and I are alone and I start to feel bad. Christmas commercialism is supposed to make us feel like we are missing out and this is why they sell. Its bullshit in reality.

Cheer yourself up by buying something nice for you and all that lovely food to munch. Don't let it get you down too much most people hate Christmas.

Social media is a lie. My in-laws post loads of photos on Facebook and we look like we're having a great time but inwardly I'm screaming about being stuck in a small, hot noisy room with people who shout constantly.

I've done Christmas on my own and it can be lonely. I agree with other posters - plan some nice things for yourself. Get some of your favourite foods in, stay in your pyjamas all day or go for a long walk if that's more your thing, dig out your favourite films and books. Basically treat yourself.

social media is just a snapshot, I mean who is going to post that their kids have smeared chocolate all the way up the stairs, they fell out over whose turn it was to open a present, that so and so had a better present than me, that little johnny whioned it was the wrong colour, the breakfast ws late and sammy spilled milk on the best rug, jimmy chucked his toast at the curtains.. the turkey was dry the gravy cold, the carrots too hard and the sprouts too soft... hte other half has been doing sprout stinky farts all afternoon and the batteries ran out in the remote and they missed the start of their favourite film then the kids wailed through all the best bits...

Social media is the worst to look at if you're feeling down because everyone is posting their life highlights and it's easy to get caught up in the thought that everyone else is having a good time and you're not. I imagine Christmas Day is awful for boasting posts and snap shots of people's "perfect " Christmas.

What it won't show though is people's arguments, resentment/atmosphere amongst relatives, uncle so and so getting too drunk, people making tits of themselves, burnt food, kids throwing tantrums.. I could go on!

No it will be that one odd moment in someone's day where they snap a nice picture and that's all they will post! It's all bullshit.

Our local library run a tea/mince pies/social thing for a couple of hours on Christmas Day for people who would otherwise see nobody that day. Maybe something like that is happening near you? Either for you to attend as a volunteer or as a beneficiary?

When Christmas Eve/Day and Boxing Day arrives its over so quickly for us. Every year I ask myself why was I worried. I spent one Christmas Day at a friends house and even thiugh i was grateful i wished I was at home.

I am used to be alone now. I was such a gregarious outgoing person, I prefer being at home alone now.

I don't envy you. I think I would be tempted to volunteer maybe. I would also consider going to church. I don't really like my own company so I would find it hard.
Have you let friends know that you will be alone?

An old friend of mine chose to spend Christmas Day alone and loved it. She got lots of treats in and binge watched trash on the telly.

Not all social media is bad on Xmas Day. Sarah Millican started #joinin on Twitter a couple of years ago for anyone spending the day alone and wanting some virtual company.

I had Christmas alone last year and I LOVED it, no drama or worry just made my self a nice meal and chilled and pottered about all day.

I was in this situation a few years back. I won't go into details, but it was family issues beyond my control and I just wanted to fuck the whole day off.

I had a bottle of champagne in my drinks cabinet for months, so I stuck it fridge the day before and went and got a beautiful Indian takeaway on the day, which I had with the champagne on Christmas Day evening, whilst watching loads of trashy TV alone. It was very liberating.

Christmas the following year I wasn't bothered about, for similar reasons, so I went and volunteered at a local homeless Christmas meal event. Which was really fulfilling for all involved.

That same evening I had my now DP over, plus a friend who was going to be alone due to a relationship breakdown and not coping well, and we had a lovely meal, very relaxed, not OTT Christmassy.

Last year I didn't put a tree up because of mega work pressures and 14 hour days in the days before and had another chilled day with DP.

As long as you're happy with how you spend it, ignore others or what's supposedly expected / the 'right way' to spend it. It's just another day.

Yup, I was also going to say #joinin. Plus I tend to IM friends who I know will also be alone/hating Christmas.

Definitely make a plan for the day - plan out your telly, your food, what else you're going to do. Get some special treats in, and enjoy not having to share the sofa or the remote with anyone else.

I am too OP x

I'm not on my own this time but spent 5 Christmases alone. I copied by spoiling myself by getting a DVD, food that I liked and that was easy to cook (I hate cooking), I got some gorgeous bath bombs so I could lounge in the bath and pamper myself. I had mixed feelings about it esp as other people react so badly but it is only ONE day of the year. I did things I wanted to do and then realised how many people actually didn't enjoy Christmas because of the pressure to cook and be with people they didn't like, I felt liberated from those expectations. I'm not saying it isn't hard sometimes it made you feel so excluded from the world but remember social media is a lie it's edited. Take care OP.

Most of what is on social media is nonsense! FWIW we are doing a big family lunch at my sisters, there will be lots of happy pics posted on FB, but it will be fraught with stress. I’m dreading it (we were railroaded into it) as I seem to have the job of chief cook and I’ve been awake for hours stressing. Wishing I could cancel the whole thing and spend the day in my PJs with the dog and a box of chocolates. I appreciate not everyone enjoys the thought of spending the day alone even with wine/chocs/trash tv, so if that’s the case definitely find out about volunteering. In our small town there are two Xmas lunches being held for people spending the day alone...Maybe check your local news/social media to see if there’s something you could attend or help at?

Spoil yourself OP. I'm not looking forward to ours at all for reasons I won't go into.. Its not all happy families the way it appears on fb. Its one day... It will pass.

Hey OP just checking in on you today. What did you decide to do in the end? Remember it is just one day.

Hi OP,

How you doing?

I’m not alone but like some PPs would also like a quiet day to do as I please. Hope you’re ok x