To call it a day with breastfeeding

[firsttimemaman]

DS is 10 months.
Has always adored breastfeeding, however over the past few weeks he's wanted it less during the day and now only had it to go to sleep and throughout the night (we co sleep).

Went to put him to bed tonight, and he kept biting me hard, I felt so upset and cross.

Totally unreasonable I know!

Frustrated because it's the only way he falls asleep and upset because he doesn't understand what he's doing at that he's hurting me.

I called DH and said I couldn't continue putting him to bed because he had hurt me so much (he must have bit me 10 times).

DH lay in our bed with him and 20 minutes later he's down and we're watching tv!

I feel liberated but sad.

Do I have my evenings back?

Do I let DH do the whole bedtime routine from now on?

Do we now work on getting him out of our bed or one step at a time?

I feel like I'm such a bad mum with no routine x

I do know they say don’t give up on a bad day. If he will take enough milk from elsewhere then you have no need to continue if you don’t want to. My DD bites when she’s not actually hungry. Feeling for you OP.

I only want to say well done for carrying on breast feeding for 10 months.

8 month old here, and I think I'm heading in the same direction. If you don't want to stop now for whatever reason, could you try shifting his last meal so he'll be hungrier (and maybe less inclined to bite) in the evening? Or could you try dream feeding him instead? I've been bitten a couple of times, but that's when he's not that interested or frustrated waiting for letdown. Also, definitely happened when he's teething, and he's stopped again.

I'm really not looking forward to stopping feeding, but I hope this stressful bit will just fade with time like so many other things that have already passed since he was born.

I think I'll try to find routine doing something else, particularly at bedtime, like always being the one to read his bedtime story or something. Good luck.

Of course YANBU! One of the big factors when I gave up actually was that it had started hurting again, I found myself wincing when she was feeding. 10 months is good going as well, and well beyond average. You've done amazingly! Keep telling yourself that when the mum guilt tries to get you.

Now my DH does all bad times and I sit downstairs with Mumsnet (and wine).

Sounds like you are both ready. I got through one round of biting at 11 months but when dd started doing it again at 13 months I called it a day. She was only feeding at night by this stage. I was so tense waiting for the pain of the biting.

Once my DD reached about 11 months BF became only an early hours/morning thing and she started goin in her own bed with a bottle of formula at night then we called it a day when she reached 13months

She's 21 months now and still a booby holder..

My eldest didn't bite and kept on with just the last feed at night until 15 months, my youngest bite me numerous times and I gave up at 9 months. She didn't really need it, it was just for comfort so it wasn't like she was going to suffer. If your dc won't stop biting then yes give up and reclaim your evening.

Call it a day!

You have done a great job.

I fed both of mine for about 13 months, only at night for the last 3 months, but my youngest kept on sucking when my milk was drying up as he obviously needed the comfort aspect but not the milk. Don't feel guilty, nor feel envy if the baton of evening care is falling to your dh. Good parenting is about sharing the burden.

The exact same thing happened to me, also at 10mo. I decided to stop (I realised my supply wasn't that great by then I think) and decided to go out in style with one last sleepy dream feed. She fed really well, despite being basically asleep and just as I was lovingly gazing at her, enjoying our final bf, about to put her back into bed, CHOMP. I'm sure she nearly took my nipple off. So that was it for us!

If you want to give up it might be a good time to. If you want to carry on I found the biting only lasted a couple of weeks around that age, it seems much longer at the time though!

My first born got his first teeth at 4 months so definitely experienced the biting but couldn't give up as he wasn't on food at that point. What I did was just screamed loudly when he did it, and took him off immediately. I'd then try again and repeat everytime he bit me. Even at 4 months he soon learnt so your 10 month old will definitely be able to also quickly learn not to bite. Having said that I also ceased all night feeds cold turkey once my son turned 4 months as I read that at 4 months their stomach is large enough for them to not be hungry during the night. So I'd do one last feed before bed time and then nothing til morning. It was great and he started sleeping through after that. So frankly if the only time your baby feeds is at night and not during the day anymore. ... for sure id stop! Reclaim your nights and rejoice in the liberation!

Apols for the shite grammar - I'm (cluster) breastfeeding my second born so super knackered and very much fantasising about getting my nights back lol

Added info: I breast fed my first born till he was a year. It took about 1 week to 10 days for him to learn not to bite and he never bit again even when the rest of his teeth came in. So have hope your kid can definitely learn to not bite.

I breast fed my first till 2 1/2 and when she started biting just firmly and loudly said "no". She soon stopped.

Give ds some nice warm toast to chomp on. And a drink of warm milk or water instead. You can't be chewed.

No matter how long you've been breastfeeding it always feel a bit sad when you stop. Do what's best for you OP.

Thanks so much everyone and yes the waiting for the bite is the worst!

His two front teeth are just coming through now so I'm sure it's down to that!

It's just made me realise how dependent I AM on breastfeeding in that it's the only way I get him to sleep at night.

I'm letting DH try to put him down tonight (as we speak).

I can hear they're currently on the third run of The Tiger That Came To Tea