I was always the funny one. The one everyone wanted on a night out as I was always laughing and telling jokes. I had loads of friends and was active socially. In reality, although I didn't know it At the time, I was suffering from depression and anxiety and when I had my Son 5 years ago it hit me terribly. I could barely get out of bed and even considered giving my Son up for adoption but thanks to an amazing team of professionals I have fully recovered and I am now on a maintenance dose of anti-depressants.
I've never felt so at peace and contented and have found counselling a lifesaver for me.
Only problem now is that I have become incredibly boring. The 'class clown' image was just an act deep down and in reality I am quite quiet and calm. I no longer feel the need to be the funny one as I am confident in who I am.
But apart from one friend who is amazingly loyal. All my friends have ended contact. I think I've just become incredibly boring!
I went out with my friends a few times before slowly the invites started to dry up and my offers to meet up went ignored. I knew the friendship group was no longer mine when I was invited out for a meal and drinks and then everyone said they were heading home. I got on the train but it was delayed so I sat in the carriage waiting at the platform. My other friends were walking home and I saw them walk into the bar at the station and later saw on facebook they had stayed out hours after I had left. I am sure they just wanted to be without me.
I don't want to change who I am. But I just feel sad that without my funny persona no one seems to want to be friends. I have moved to live nearer family and while my son has made loads of friends I don't seem to really connect with any of their mums so play dates never happen.
I'd love to find someone who is a little boring like me! Whose idea of fun is sitting having a coffee or watching tv with a hot chocolate.
Does anyone else feel like me? It seems to me that everyone else has a group of friends and seems to be able to make friends naturally or those that can't are shy. But I'm not shy at all and have a job that requires constant socialising. So I should be just as good as I used to be.
Anyone else feel the same? AIBU to think my old friends weren't really friends if I'm not too boring to bother with and I'm right to not try and get back in contact? They know I have had depression.