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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Am I being ungrateful

8 replies

NotMyOriginalName1 · 09/12/2018 13:18

My father is an avid buyer on amazon and gets %99 percent of things he needs online, except food etc. As Christmas is coming up he's been buying for me and DS and the parcels are delivered to my door. We don't live close so it's convenient this way.

My problem is aside DS's presents which we now have, he's ordering us bits and bats like wrapping paper, present labels, little niggly things like a pack tinsel for the tree or window decorations. Things I don't need and can pick up myself from the local shops for a couple of quid or less, he has no need to buy them for us and I've said as much but he insists.

They all come individually and he let's me know on the morning which is due to arrive but of course they don't give a time, it just says before 9pm. I'm then expected to sit indoors and wait for the deliveries whether I have things to do or not.

If me and DP are out or he's sleeping (night worker) my dad then moans and gets the hump if the delivery isn't received. I don't like to upset him because I can't be arsed with his moods.

I'm stuck indoors again today waiting for a delivery that we don't need, DS is bored shitless, I'm getting irritable as I need to get to the supermarket before it closes early with it being Sunday but being in for a delivery is more important to him.

The majority of these deliveries could fit through the letterbox if amazon didn't insist on packing them in square cardboard boxes. Neighbours don't accept parcels on our behalf.

Am I being ungrateful or would this drive you up the wall too?

OP posts:
NoFucksImAQueen · 09/12/2018 13:19

add a safe space so they can leave them if you aren't in?

NotMyOriginalName1 · 09/12/2018 13:21

Our flat is on a main road so unfortunately we don't have anywhere safe they can be left.

OP posts:
Chesneyhawkes1 · 09/12/2018 13:21

I have a plastic chest outside mr front door with my wellies etc in. Amazon always leave them in there. I'm rarely in for a delivery

TripTrapTripTrapOverTheBridge · 09/12/2018 13:22

Ask him to send them to an Amazon Locker? Or just go out and rearrange delivery. If you explain to him and show actual appreciation instead of telling him you can get it yourself then he'll probably be ok.

sirmione16 · 09/12/2018 13:25

Have you told him you don't need decorations, paper etc? Say you're not being mean - you'd just rather him save him money!

daisypond · 09/12/2018 13:25

Why don't you explain more clearly to your dad? He thinks he's helping you and being nice by paying for the wrapping paper and accessories? You need to explain that while you're grateful for the thought, it actually causes you extra hassle and inconvenience.

IamSusan · 09/12/2018 13:35

Its sounds ridiculous, I never stay home for a delivery unless I bought a washing machine or a new computer - anything big and expensive that needs to be delivered inside. Anything else from Amazon is either left at the door - they can be quite creative, and the bins are hidden away past a locked gate, so no risk of parcels ending there. Otherwise the courier can come back, who can stay home all day waiting for random parcels?

If they can't leave item safely, they'll just have to come back - amazon lockers are great too.

NotMyOriginalName1 · 09/12/2018 13:41

I don't know anything about amazon lockers so I'll look into that.

Whenever we've missed a delivery before they go back to depot and he gets an email saying the item couldn't be delivered and then he has a go at me on the phone.

I've been very honest and polite about it not being necessary and have thanked him for everything he sends but explained I can't really be stuck indoors all day on any given day if I have things to do. He insists.

I've told him I can't stay in today as I have shopping to do and he said well you'll have to stay in tomorrow then incase they try to redeliver, I have a scan tomorrow at 12:00pm so that's not an option.

He can be lovely but he's the type to have a go at me if I prioritised something else above waiting for the delivery.

I've been careful not to sound ungrateful to him, but it's driving me up the wall

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