Aibu to be this upset?

[Tunnocks34]

Currently miscarrying. Or maybe this is a chemical pregnancy as I am only 5 weeks.

Baby was unplanned due to getting married, and this couldn’t have been a worse time.

But I’m sad, really sad. OH isn’t particularly sad I don’t think, he is more sympathetic towards me I think, he’s really concerned, wants me to rest, wants to know how he can help. But I don’t think he’s actually sad. He tried to make it better by saying ‘at least we can still get married next year as planned, and we’ll have another baby next year’ which made it worse.

I don’t know. I feel stupid being so sad when last week I was willing my period to come.

When I miscarried DH seemed more worried about me, I certainly never saw him cry. He spent the whole time propping me up. But I know he was also devastated. Maybe it's the same for your DH, he's just looking out for you, putting you first.

It's still very recent for you both. Don't let it make you upset. I'm sure he really does care about what's happened.

Sorry for your loss

I'm so sorry for your loss OP

I understand just how you feel, me and DP were planning to have kids but weren’t quite in the right position (mainly that Id just started a new job on a temporary contract) so planned to wait 6-12 months, but then I got pregnant accidentally.

I was like you, wishing my period to come because the timing was so bad, but when I miscarried a few weeks later I was devastated. DP didn’t show how upset he was until a few weeks later, at the time he was focused on making sure I was ok.
Even though it was unplanned you are totally allowed to grieve and it’s not stupid at all.

Sorry for your loss x

Thank you all. Guess I’ll just take it a day at a time. Focus on my two beautiful boys.

With my miscarriage, dh was quite scientific about it, although he obviously looked after and cared for me.
To me, it was a baby, whereas to dh, it was yet to reach that point for him.

for you. The Miscarriage Association is an amazing support for you.

be kind to yourself, time to grieve and heal and as you quite rightly say take each day as it comes.

(When I say, "Don't let it make you upset", I mean DH's current reaction, not the mc. Grieve as much as you need to for the mc x)

°💐 Sorry about your miscarriage. I don’t think it’s unusual for your emotions to surprise you with things like this. Your OH sounds like he really cares for you. I don’t think you should hold it against him that he isn’t as sad as you are about the miscarriage.

wheeee I’m not holding it against him at all, he’s been fantastic and supportive the last day or so. I’m just confused how I feel really. Maybe if OH was more upset I’d feel justified myself being upset? I don’t know, I don’t blame him at all though, he’s been fantastic. Thank you all. Xx

Sorry, I don’t think I said that very well. You hadn’t given the impression you were annoyed with him or anything like that. Sorry! 😌

wheeee it’s fine, my response came across a bit harsher than it sounded in my head! Perils of communicating by text!

My DH was the same.

Amazingly practical and was a godsend dealing with our DS while it was all going on.

In fairness though, I loved his pragmatism. It was exactly what I needed. He was sad but also very hopeful that we’d have another because DS had been conceived very quickly as had the baby I lost.

Sure enough he was right and I’ve now got a six month old who was conceived weeks after my mc.