To raise a formal complaint regarding school isolation

[HaudYerWheeshtYaWeeBellend]

Last week a group of 20-30 kids were throwing acorns at each other in the school playing field, a child who also throwing the acorns, got hit in the eye which I've been led to believe required medical treatment, teacher asked who hit the child and DS said he believed it was his acorn, and that he was sorry, and did not mean to cause anyone harm.

He was given a days isolation plus after school detention, however on the day with only 10 mins notice.

His head of year called and said as he admitted it was him, they had no choice to follow the isolation process, however admitted they thought it was harsh, however rules and rules which we will adhere to and support the school with.

DS has NEVER been in isolation.

My AIBU is, Ds was made to sit in a 2 by 4 booth, being made to sit upright and face a white wall for the whole of the school day. NO SCHOOL WORK WAS GIVEN AT ALL

He could not tell the supervisor he had no course work as he isn't allowed to talk while in isolation, and tbh nor should even have to ask for course work, its the supervisors role to ensure DS has course work, which is the policy in DS school.

Only one teacher called the isolation supervisor to ask if DS was present, however did not send course work, not one of his other 4 teachers called to ask if he was present.

The isolation supervisor has confirmed all of the above is true his HOY has advised us that they have passed it on to the isolation manager who will be calling me, however even after chasing it up everyday for the past week and leaving messages for them to call me I am still awaiting the phone call.

My own DS ended up requiring medical treatment as he endured a headache with sickness and sensitivity to light, ds has never had a migraine before isolation, which the A&E doctors advised was the cause.

iaamright - I do mean a formal complaint, what would you suggest otherwise when the head of isolation refuses to engage with me, and DS HOY cannot help as its not her department, she is also very unhappy at DS treatment which has been backed with DS hospital discharge letter

The HOY made her own investigations with the isolation supervisor, who confirmed everything DS had said was true.

I asked to speak to the Head today, however was told I needed to speak to the isolation manager

I guess next time he wont tell the truth.

All of the children potentially could have been the one either injured or doing the injury so if they were going to punish one then they should have punished them all. It looks like they were just making an example of him.

I can't believe this 'isolation' is a normal part of the school punishment system. What do they learn by staring at the wall for the whole school day? In this instance it seems like a good way to teach children to avoid punishment by lying next times something like this happens..... which no doubt it will because kids have been playing these sorts of games forever. When I was a kid we used to do it with the overripe apricots on our tree. I am sure someone being hit in the eye with one of those would have been hurt too.

My Dad still talks about how he was beaten at school (he is 66). It absolutely petrified him, he hated school and he left school at 14.
I don't know, but to me, you put a child in time out for every age of their life. So 12 minutes would have done for this guy. At playtime/recess. 12 minutes isolation while your peers are having fun is enough torture. 8 hours staring at a white wall is criminal.

Hopefully dukes where schools are properly funded, where teachers are not expected to be nose wipers, social workers, disciplinarians, mental health experts, child minders and very lastly teachers. Where parental expectations of an over-worked, under paid teacher are not totally unreasonable. Where disrespect from students and parents is not tolerated. Where is this amazing place?.

This is really annoying me. We have a world where too many adults tell unnecessary lies and cannot own up to their mistakes, while we have children being taught at school that owning up to your mistakes will bring draconian punishment down on them.

Why would I want any child of mine to learn that?

Isolation?? I think this is a horrendous form of punishment, we are not in the 1950's. I agree he should of been punished but this is not a suitable form of punishment. Schools are not supposed to be prisons. They are not thinking about children's mental health or any health having that as a form of punishment. Not being allowed to ask to go to the toilet,some how I doubt prisoners are even treated that way. I think I would report the school to the police and social services for cruelty to children.

I agree though this isolation stuff is very concerning.

Also, if a parent did this to their own child and the school found out about it, they'd be calling it a safeguarding issue I bet.

How is this any different?

OP
I would email the headteacher stating that you want to support the schools policies but are disappointed that you have not had a response from the isolation manager and therefore you would like to request a meeting with the hoy, isolation manager and the headteacher.
If not, you’ll have no alternative to raise the issue with the governor.
However, at this time of year many staff are absent with colds/flu etc. Maybe the staff memeber you wanted to speak to has not been in school and therefore unable to reply?

YANBU OP.

Everyone going on out how OP's son has learned his lesson, do you think children always need punishing to learn? I imagine that as soon as the other child was hurt he learnt his lesson.

The school should have punished everyone who was throwing acorns if they were going to punish anyone.

Sitting staring at a wall for 5 hours (or however long it was) with nothing to do would be massively frowned upon by teachers if it happened at home. I can guarantee you that if a parent came on and asked if this was an appropriate punishment for their child most of MN would be up in arms about it. It makes no difference that this happened in school.

If you put a child in isolation then they need something to do and if teachers can't organise that then they need to come up with something else.

I have always backed the school but if this was me I wouldn't be backing them on this one. Isolation all day with nothing to do except looking at a wall is not acceptable. Especially not for being the one to admit their flying acorn hit someone when a bunch of them were pissing around with them.

Shame your son was honest really OP. I am sure he will think twice before owning up to something again. The school did a really shit job here.

They'd probably be calling it a safeguarding concern actually !

OP YNBU to complain and you're right in that nothing changes otherwise. I would expect the person supervising isolation to take a common sense approach so that other resources were available in the room and that pupils were directed to these. Your DC was a bit silly and isolation in itself is a fair punishment but that doesn't mean just accepting everything that the school do without question. That's a terrible thing to teach children. I would also be unimpressed if i had to spend my evening in a&e with a poorly child as a result of a punishments. A child shouldn't be harmed at school by a punishment.

Email the head and say you wish to discuss a safeguarding issue. That should do the trick. If not try the Head of Governors.

Can I thank you all for those who think Ds has been treated unfairly in terms of his isolation treatment, on first reading I thought I was going insane, being made to feel as if I was causing some sort of school drama, and that I was raising a bully and a rule breaking child.

He is not, hes a lovely sports mad, straight A pupil (well a C in Design Tech, as cooking is boring) who today on his school report scored 116 KS2 start points.

Hes honestly not a bad kid, just a silly one, I mean he has his moments at home, but I wouldn't have him any other way. I do believe he has learnt from this tho.

They'd probably be calling it a safeguarding concern actually

I'm sure they would, or at the very least it would raise questions and judgment. Can you imagine what they would think if a child admitted to being stuck in a room for hours , staring at a wall which resulted in a migraine and an A&E visit.

But hey, teachers are overworked so not their fault the child was left to stare at the wall with nothing to do!

That punishment would be torture for me.

HaudYerWheeshtYaWeeBellend Poor kid has probably learned not to own up!

He also won't look at an acorn the same way again .

Also, whike your son did not get work, as it’s his first time in the isolation room, do you know if this is a regularly occurrence? Maybe it was a one off and schools make mistakes

Oh, the irony!

From what OP has said it is NOT their policy.

So it would appear that they did make a mistake. In this case, a pretty big one as I would be extremely unimpressed if my child was put in isolation on what was slightly spurious basis (by the school's own admission- OP said the teacher who called said they thought it was a bit much but as rules are rules, he had to go to isolation) and then made to sit straight, looking at a wall with no work to do all day. Especially if the teacher managed to notice he had put his head on the desk when he felt unwell- so managed to notice that and tell he had to sit up straight but but had not managed to notice that he had no work to do. Either teacher was not paying attention or did not know what school policy was. Neither is acceptable.

Nor is it acceptable for the staff member with responsibility for isolation not contacting OP as promised and not responding to calls/messages. Again, could be an error that they keep forgetting rather than deliberately avoiding having to deal with the fall out from their own mistake: either way- again, very ironic.

So school make a mistake (or could be seen as breaking their own rules)- "oh well, schools get it wrong sometimes. Don't make too much of a fuss, we all make mistakes". Teacher makes a mistake- well, they're very busy and sometimes they make mistakes- so again, this can be used as an excuse for not doing as they promised/getting it wrong. But a child breaks a rule/makes a mistake- well, not acceptable and significant punishment out in place (and poorly executed at that). How is that logical?

Agree, OPs DS and his friends/peers needed to be told off for their silly behaviour. They ALL deserved to have some form of punishment.

The school also need to be taken to task for not following their own policies, for instituting a ridiculous and OTT policy and also for not responding to OP as promised.

In OPs position, I would be raising my concerns about what happened. If I did not receive a call as promised in the next working day, as I had already waited for a week and left several messages, then I would be taking it above the head of the isolation supervisor and to the head. More than a week is really sufficient time to respond to concerns of this nature. It is also unprofessional to not act as promised and to ignore messaged left for you.

OP this is horrendous. It sounds like psychological torture, not the results of an accident and some low level misbehaviour at school. I cannot believe so many people think this is ok and that you are overreacting.
I live in a bit of a bubble I’ll admit but my children’s schools would never treat them like this. What is wrong with admonishment by a senior staff member and a detention? I just simply can’t believe that we are treating children this way; it is beyond appalling and I can’t believe it is legal. Your poor DS I hope he is recovering.

If you look at the shower of cunts running the country at present, you will see why we need a lot more undermining of authority and resistance to it. The problems with the education system mainly stem from lack of funding combined with letting fucking idiots with unhealthy wank fantasies about schoolgirls in short skirts and not an atom of a clue about how young people learn take charge of it. So there are a lot of teens with MH problems and SEN which are either undiagnosed or not being treated, stuck in mainstream education which isn't working for them, because there's no money for the support they need, no chance of an appointment with CAHMs unless they're self-harming in the middle of lessons or suicidal. There are kids coming to school cold and hungry because their parents' benefits have been cut off for some bullshit reason or other, and the parents' misery and fear about whether they are going to lose their home, or have their DC taken away, affects these kids.

And the current attitude, imposed from the top down by people who have never missed a meal or worried about whether the electricity will run out before they've finished their homework, is to bully and terrorize these kids, with humiliating or stress-inducing punishment for tiny misdemeanours or mistakes, subject them to repeated tests with warnings that low marks will mean further punishment or a life of 'failure'... Contempt for 'authority' is a fairly healthy response in these circumstances.

OP I bet he instantly regretted what he did and would never have done it again and didn't need punishing to drive that lesson home.

I know my children learn a hell of a lot when they mess up with just thinking about what they did.

Your son sounds lovely and you sound very level headed. I am sorry your son had such a shit time.

@Haudyer no reasonable person would think he was a bad kid for one moment, throwing games like this are perfectly normal and lots of fun.... until someone gets hurt. That's why water bombs exist..... even adults like to join in the fun.

I agree with the above poster that the accident would have been punishment enough for most children, no one wants to hurt their friends and I am sure he will think twice before doing it again.

I really don't see the point of this thread OP. If you think you should complain about the school "not following the isolation procedure"- and you clearly do- then complain.

This boy has learnt a valuable lesson here: never admit fault.

And why are people going on about headaches when the OP has said it was a migraine? They are totally TOTALLY different things. I regularly have migraines but with no headache symptoms at all. The blindness, face/arm numbness and confusion could easily send me to A&E if I didn't know what was going on.

I think it's ludicrous to put a child in isolation without work when schools bang on about the detrimental effect of missed days, but I'm also aware that Ofsted pleasing school policies are often ignored in favour of shaming and 'making a point'. I'd tell my child off for acting like a five-year-old, ask for clarification of school policies (without telling my child), then hope I never have to refer to them again.

Sitting staring at a wall for 5 hours (or however long it was) with nothing to do would be massively frowned upon by teachers if it happened at home. I can guarantee you that if a parent came on and asked if this was an appropriate punishment for their child most of MN would be up in arms about it. It makes no difference that this happened in school

Also agree with this. And am usually one who says you need to support school disciplinary procedures, even if you don't 100% agree, as children cannot learn that they can play school and parents off against one another. Nor would I categorically believe everything a child told me about a particular event- they may misinterpret, misunderstand or even lie about something. Again, OP has spoken to school who have confirmed what OP DS reported her was accurate.

I think many teachers who heard a child had been punished at home by being "put in isolation" and made to sit (straight, no slumping or wriggling about) and stare at the wall in silence for most of the day would raise safeguarding concerns. I know as a HCP, I would certainly be questioning the judgement of parent who took this form of approach and would definitely discuss it with others with a view to report to safeguarding.

I don't think children being made to sit in silence doing work and not being allowed to chat or fidget is in any way comparable. I can see that for some children, this is an appropriate punishment- e.g. if they are noisy or disruptive in class.

Well you said he’s never had a migraine before he was put in isolation which heavily implies he’d had a migraine.
But whatever. Like a lot of parents you’d rather focus on the punishment than the fact that your son can avoid any punishment by not doing things like throwing acorns at peoples heads. And you’d rather believe that your son couldn’t have possibly asked for any work when that’s clearly ludicrous so good luck with that.