To be unhappy

[YoucancallmeMasha]

I feel like dps roommate... 2 nights out of 7 if I'm lucky he'll come in to bed, he sits up watching podcasts n footie rubbish all night n when I get up to make ds breakfast I kick him through to the room we are literally like roommates it's horrible we sit on seperate seats on our phones while ds sleeps I watch stuff I like n he listens to stuff on his phone

You guys need a big lifestyle change. There's no need for him to be on his phone all night. With the risk of suggesting you mother him, taken his phone off him. People are addicted to then these days. I went through a phase with my husband and he was addicted a just couldn't put it down. I took it off him, these days he'll play on it for an hour in the evening when I watch emmerdale and put baby to bed but it's not allowed out when the kids are up. If he had no phone and was bored he may consider job hunting

Sorry for typos

I suggest this all the time, I even scroll through looking for something the two of us can watch incase he's fed up of my programs, only so much come dine you can watch in one day haha but nope he just says watch what you want n back to his phone

OP this is no way to live! From your OP it just sounded like you’d both stopped making time for each other and making an effort so from that perspective I thought it could be saved (assuming he also wants it to be saved) by having a serious, open discussion about what you both need from the relationship and then putting some rules in place to achieve that. For example DP and I have a “no phones after 10pm” rule which has dramatically improved our happiness, concentration and closeness.

But your update has really worried me. He has no job?? And just sits and plays on his phone or sleeps?? This is a serious addiction which has affected his life to the point he can’t provide for his family! You have much bigger problems than him not coming to bed with you - he’s leaving you to do everything! Provide financially, look after the baby, do the housework etc, and all in return for absolutely nothing from him, not even basic affection!

You would be better off single as then at least you’d get a break when he was looking after the baby and he’d have to get a job if you were no longer providing for him, so you’d probably get maintenance from him too. Plus you could hope to find a man who would show you affection and be a proper partner to you.

I would turn off the WiFi and say you want a serious discussion about your life as you’re very unhappy with how things are. Tell him he needs to get a job, needs to look after the baby 3 nights a week and needs to agree to turn his phone off at X time each evening, otherwise you’ll be leaving him. See what his reaction is and whether he loves you and his son more than his dear phone!

Agree with ConkerGame, you'd be far better off single. No-one puts up with that sort of 'Cavalier' behaviour nowadays, why should you?

How old are you and DP? Sorry to ask personal question but people sometimes settle - far too early!

You are worth a lot more.