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Original poster

To expect a babysitter to interact?

16 replies

ILikePaperHats · 05/12/2018 23:05

I don't use babysitters v often (can't afford, single mother!) but the last one I had (girl, aged 15) she just parked her bike on my garden, sat herself at the kitchen table and started doing her homework. I showed her round and introduced her to my two kids, and told her what was expected (put youngest (DS4) to bed at 7.30, read him a story, teeth etc; oldest bed by 8.30 no need for story). She did the bare minimum, sat at the table in a different room from the kids and started doing homework straight away. My eldest said the next day he just took himself to bed himself and felt a bit neglected. Is this standard for young babysitters? Am I wrong to expect more? Of course she can do what she likes (within reason!) after they've gone to bed. She was paid £5 an hour.

OP posts:
wowbutter · 05/12/2018 23:07

For a fiver an hour I always assumed they'd arrive once the kids were in bed...

Sweepington · 05/12/2018 23:08

I think maybe set out the expectation you would like her to engage with them until they are in bed.
Did she have much experience babysitting?

HauntedPencil · 05/12/2018 23:09

Ours puts the children to bed and reads them astory.

It's really irrelevant how much you pay they have to look after them!

Klobuchar · 05/12/2018 23:09

Is that the going rate for babysitters these days?

Original poster
ILikePaperHats · 05/12/2018 23:10

Apparently she's done it before and was recommended by my ex childminder.
Don't think it's always feasible to get them all in bed and asleep before you go out, otherwise you wouldn't be able to leave the house until 9pm!

OP posts:
Lemond1fficult · 05/12/2018 23:10

Unless she's an unusual teen who really likes/knows kids, she'll just do the minimum. She probably hasn't got a clue beyond 'stop kid injuring self'. And following your instructions.

AnastasiaVonBeaverhausen · 05/12/2018 23:12

If I pay for nursery/childminder I expect full interaction.
A teenage baby sitter I just expect to keep them safe and make sure there are no disasters.

Sweepington · 05/12/2018 23:13

I used to get a fiver for the whole evening

Walkingdeadfangirl · 05/12/2018 23:13

15 year old baby sitter at £5 is not a nanny or an EYFS childminder. She is just there to make sure the children are safe, you are lucky you have got one that can put 2 young children to bed. For what and who you are paying, your expectations are to high.

MeredithGrey1 · 05/12/2018 23:22

How long before bedtime did she arrive? When I babysat as a teenager, even if the actual bedtime wasn’t for a little while, the kids were in their pyjamas and teeth were brushed so actually putting them to bed didn’t involve a whole lot. A child like your eldest who didn’t need a story, I wouldn’t really have done much beside going up with them, checking all ok, and then keeping an ear out.

arethereanyleftatall · 05/12/2018 23:34

Whenever I babysit, even when I do it for £5 a hour, I'll always interact. I think it was a bit rude of her to instantly get her homework out, she could have waited a little bit.

Purpleartichoke · 05/12/2018 23:36

Her job is to play with the kids, put them to bed, then do her homework. I wouldn’t use her again or recommend her services.

HeddaGarbled · 05/12/2018 23:43

Well, not very proactive of her and I’m sure some other teenagers would have been more interactive, but she’s a babysitter not a childminder. In my babysitting days, the children were usually in bed by the time I arrived, or if an older one was up, we’d probably just watch TV together until their bedtime. I never read a story or supervised tooth brushing. I was really just there to make sure they were safe.

hooveringhamabeads · 05/12/2018 23:50

If she’s 15 she probably has mock exams at the moment or very soon. Maybe she’s snowed under with school work/revision at the moment, but at the same time didn’t want to let down a new client by saying no to babysitting. Might be worth giving her another chance.

bluecanoeforyou · 05/12/2018 23:53

I pay a child minder £8/hour and expect her to play/interact with the kids, but a teenage babysitter I wouldn't expect more than making sure they were safe

BackforGood · 06/12/2018 00:02

It depends on the child(ren)

Both my dds have had regular and 'one off' babysitting jobs. They would expect to interact with the child, but some dc prefer not to. dd1 had a regular slot over about 2 yrs (was only for 1 - 2 hours once a week between the Mum going out and the Dad getting home). The ds was about 7 then 8. He didn't really want to engage. He felt he was "too big" to have "a lady" Grin 'put him to bed' and much preferred to get changed in private, clean his teeth in private, etc. He watched TV when she got there and didn't really want to chat with her or interact, so it became the normfor her to use it as a chance to do homework.
So, if that is what she has been used to with other people she sits for, then it wouldn't seem strange.
dd2 OTOH, would probably sit and play with his lego or whatever even if the dc didn't want to Wink

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