I've been trying to arrange a group of 3 of us to go on outing for drinks and entertainment for a couple of months now as a Christmas catchup and it was a pain in the rear to pin down a date for the other two but it was arranged for this week. Two weeks ago I saw my friend who is part of said group who told me that the other person we were going with couldn't come (gave a good reason why although that person has not told me this herself). I was quite disappointed but said since it's been planned a while, let's still do it. This friend was very enthusiastic, said yes to meeting up but wanted it more local than Central London to avoid the faff of getting a train. So we arranged it to go somewhere that was cheaper and more relaxed but 30 minutes away from both our homes.
This week, friend messaged me and said "are we still on, shall we just go to the pub 5 minutes from where you live?" (This is still at least 20 minutes taxi away from her house.) I replied and said the reason I'd arranged it was so we could go somewhere with nice food and drinks at a reasonable price but was happy either way just wanted her to know the place she was suggesting wasn't great for that (we'd be essentially going to Wetherspoons). She said in that case we'll do as we'd planned.
Today she has text saying she's busy as she going away and doesn't want to be rushing me during our drinks so wants to do the week leading up to Christmas. I don't know about others but that's usually mad for me, especially with a child and last minute stuff, the calendar is so booked up I'm trying to slot in things wherever I can but it's just not possible. I'm a bit confused though because she's known about going away all along and never brought that up as an issue. So I said I'd have to leave it until she came back and her response was asking if we could go to a place 5 minutes from her house instead?
We've had this a fair bit over this last year, cancellations for whatever reason and not seeing each other for months, at first it was both of us but it's getting more frequent on her part, especially when it's only 4 times a year I end up seeing her. I'm always laid back about what's planned, where we go, etc., although it's been more difficult since having a child, I try my hardest to get things arranged that work for both of us but lunch suddenly gets rearranged as dinner and drinks at 7 or a pub further away which is harder for me to get home from but I try to oblige wherever possible.
I really needed a glass of wine and a chat with another adult outside of my home but I will be so annoyed if I go nearer her and she's clock watching that I feel like saying no.
AIBU about this?