Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. A phone that grows with your child.

Meet the Other Phone.
A phone that grows with your child.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To ask would you do it all again?

28 replies

WhoKnewBeefStew · 05/12/2018 16:10

Having a tough time at the mo with the dc and was takking to a friend about this. We have differing opinions Smile

So imagine you’ve just been transported back to when you were in your late teens (before you had dc). Your dc are all grown up and happy living their lives and you can still see them and be in their lives. Would you, have children again? Obviously you won’t get ‘the same dc again’ as they are adults, but new dc with all that goes with them?

OP posts:
Exhaustedmummy1811 · 05/12/2018 16:13

I am currently expecting number 5.if I could go back I would do it all the same, I wouldn't want different children and I wouldn't want to be without them. They test me beyond my limits some days haha but I love them. The only thing I might want to be different is I wish I'd had some savings behind me

KateGrey · 05/12/2018 16:16

If I could go back I’d know about the type of children I’d have? I’m not sure i would have my kids. I adore them. But two have autism and it can be very hard going. I knew I’d worry about my children but it’s a whole massive level of worry. I often panic about if I die early or something happens to me and what will happen to my children.

BorisAndDoris · 05/12/2018 16:18

I would, definitely. I LOVE being a mum. It's everything I was meant to be. (And wife of course)

BarbaraRoyale · 05/12/2018 16:18

yes , in a heart beat

Original poster
WhoKnewBeefStew · 05/12/2018 16:18

@exhaustedmummy1811 wow 5 hats off to you... Flowers

The question was, not would you do it all again, as in the same kids. Your kids have now grown into adults and are carrying on. It’s more around would you have dc again in this life?

OP posts:
ArtisanPopcorn · 05/12/2018 16:21

So a bit like having an extra 20 years of being fertile? I only had one this time so obviously not! I'd travel and study and read and exercise etc, etc.

Original poster
WhoKnewBeefStew · 05/12/2018 16:22

Sorry I’m crap at explaining Grin you can see your kids as adults, spend time with them etc? You’ve just been transported back to being 19 again (with your dh/dp), in 2018, would you have more dc?

OP posts:
Busybusybust · 05/12/2018 16:24

In a heartbeat!

Original poster
WhoKnewBeefStew · 05/12/2018 16:24

@ArtisanPopcorn yes, put far more eloquently than I did

OP posts:
Myusername101z · 05/12/2018 16:25

I understand your question and in that case I wouldn’t do it again as then I would have experience both a life raising children and a life without them

allthgoodusernamesaretaken · 05/12/2018 16:27

I don't understand your question !

Do I regret having children? Not at all. If DP and I had met younger, then we might had a larger family, but I'm happy with what we have

GooodMythicalMorning · 05/12/2018 16:28

No

Original poster
WhoKnewBeefStew · 05/12/2018 16:31

It’s not asking about regretting having dc.

If you’re fertility and life expectancy suddenly increased by 50%, would you have more dc if your current dc were adults?

OP posts:
AnastasiaVonBeaverhausen · 05/12/2018 16:33

I don't really understand. I'd definitely go back to being 18 again and live through the next 5 years, they were amazing. I think even more so being the person I am now. But I'd want to do everything the same ie meeting DH and have the DC because I really like my life now. I wouldn't have any more Children, because if I wanted more, I would have had them. So I don't really understand that bit.

AnastasiaVonBeaverhausen · 05/12/2018 16:33

If you’re fertility and life expectancy suddenly increased by 50%, would you have more dc if your current dc were adults?

God no! I'd spend the extra time travelling and doing all the things I have no time for now.

IveHitPeakTumeric · 05/12/2018 16:34

Yes I think I would. As long as I was financially comfortable enough. I do love having babies. The newborn years were some of the best of my life. Even though I had PND with DC2, they were an absolute joy and delight and falling in love with them more everyday was what kept me going when everything else was really bleak.

scarfhatglove · 05/12/2018 16:34

Your question is basically asking if all the benefits of your life having had your dc stayed the same would you put in the hard work?

Your life wouldn't be what it is though, without your dc.

I'm so glad my dc are in my life and I'd do it all again. My dc keep my life and myself in check. I don't let myself get down because it impacts on my kids.

scarfhatglove · 05/12/2018 16:36

Would I have more kids? Don't know yet. My dts are 9 months

CantWaitToRetire · 05/12/2018 16:40

Yes, absolutely would have children again, but with a different man, not the selfish git of a husband I have now.

OneStepMoreFun · 05/12/2018 16:41

You mean would I do it a second time over, having already done it once? No way. I adore my DC and they are the best thing in my life but two is enough for me, There are other things I want to do once DC are adult.

LavenderBush · 05/12/2018 16:43

No, no, a million times no!!!

Redgreencoverplant · 05/12/2018 16:44

No I wouldn't. I adore my DS and wouldn't change him for the world but have no desire for more DC. Certainly wouldn't want to go back to the baby stage when we had reached adulthood with DS. I would be off travelling etc.

Strokethefurrywall · 05/12/2018 16:52

Fuck no, not at all.

I love my babies, they are the light of my life and we're wonderfully easy babies. But there is so much more to life than parenting for me.

I'd travel again in a heartbeat, write more, study more, learn languages, sing and learn instruments again. Basically all the things I'm doing again once I hit my 40's.

My babies are 7&4 now and I can't wait to show them all the really amazing and exciting things life has to offer.

Idontbelieveinthemoon · 05/12/2018 17:00

No, I feel very much that I'm done at two and wouldn't ever want any more.

A friends Mum did that when we were in our early twenties - she had three more DC with her new (younger) DP. It looked exhausting and it's not something I'd be willing to do.

BlueThesaurusRex · 05/12/2018 17:02

I’d travel, travel, travel!

I like how you’ve worded this though- once you have kids you wouldn’t wish them out of your life so I like that your question incorporates this!

Swipe left for the next trending thread